Writing Mystery Island

[DuffCreeper]

Hello This is my Introduction to my story! (i suck at introductions and describing)

As I wake up on this mysterious island i see strange shadows in the distance wondering if they are freindly. As I take a look at my surroundings I found out that I crashed on a beach " this is serious déjà vu" I thought to myself while walking to the ocean. I crouched down to drink some salty water only to realize that i'm a.... Dewott!

And thats it for the intro!
i made a poll about turning this in into a story where people join in the story as Pokemon (more info in this later!)

 

[Incinermyn]

First off, welcome to PokeBeach and the Writer's Corner! I'm the resident fiction mod, Incinermyn. I have to ask if you'd mind making your introduction/prologue longer than it currently is. We had an issue with people posting super-short chapters in the past that were spammy, so it became the rule of thumb that all installments have to be at least 1,000 words (or somewhat close to that minimum anyways). Also your grammar and spelling could use touching up. For instance, you should have capitalized "I" more than you did, and you misspelled "realize." If you can overcome those starting hurdles, your story-writing skills should improve.

 

[DuffCreeper]

First off, welcome to PokeBeach and the Writer's Corner! I'm the resident fiction mod, Incinermyn. I have to ask if you'd mind making your introduction/prologue longer than it currently is. We had an issue with people posting super-short chapters in the past that were spammy, so it became the rule of thumb that all installments have to be at least 1,000 words (or somewhat close to that minimum anyways). Also your grammar and spelling could use touching up. For instance, you should have capitalized "I" more than you did, and you misspelled "realize." If you can overcome those starting hurdles, your story-writing skills should improve.

The Intro was small but.... I really did not get much time do do this since I had to take my kids to the movies. we got home and I had to download some stuff for a game (which had taken hours) then I went to bed. Yeah I do hope I can improve the story!

 

[Incinermyn]

Fair enough. I'll leave it open per your request and see how this turns out.

 

[Zyflair]

(i suck at introductions and describing)

As much as it's fine to admit your own shortcomings, throwing something like that as a start is a bit akin to apologizing to something bad that you're going to do anyway. I'm not suggesting that you not write, but if you realize your weaknesses, you should simply keep it to yourself and try to improve on them. That way, your story is more enjoyable for both you and the reader.

Besides, if you already know your weaknesses, then what's the point of critiquing?