Writing Pheonix Legend: Zedrathol's Destruction (Fanfic, please comment)

Lenny

its back boys and girls
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This is a fanfic. You will find out what it is about in my first chapter! Zedrathol is a dictator that forcefully took over earth. Him and his army dreadfully killed off everyone who opposed them. Chrono, was part of the royal family before Zedrathol's ruling. His family was murdered and he was thrown out on the street. A family of the Lazermon's took him, and cared for him. The Lazermon's had a big tribe, but then the Zedrathol army killed off thousandths of them. Only few remain today. Lazer is one of the youngest living. He is the actual son of the family who took Chrono. They grew up as brothers, but not always agreeing on things.

Ch. 1: The Plan

Lazer headed out if his room in his pajamas. He went up to his mom, and kissed her on the cheek. "Rice again!?" shouted Lazer. This was the third time they had rice for breakfast. "I'm sorry, but you know that we can't leave our house too far, they might find us! You don't want to end up like your dad and make stupid decisions" said Lazer's mom. "Don't talk about dad like that! Dad was brave! He almost killed Zedrathol if it wasn't for you who stopped him. We could have all been free if it wasn't for you!" shouted Lazer. "Good morning mom! Oh, rice again!" shouted Chrono. "Chrono's right, i am going out to get some food! I can't stand this rice crap you make!" shouted Lazer. "Ya, i am coming with you, too!" shouted Chrono. "Alright, but here are too weapons, one for each of you, for protection. Lazer, you get the Pheonix Blade, it was your fathers, he used it when he "almost" killed Zedrathol. And Chrono, here is the Legend Blade, it was an artifact that Lazer's dad found when he was an architect. "Thanks, we will only go for food, nothing else, right Lazer?" said Chrono. But Lazer had already run out of the cave. "Lazer!" shouted Chrono. Lazer was standing outside. He could feel the wind hit his face and he shivered. "Chrono, I had a boomerang, remember? With it, I practiced, and I learned how to move everything like a boomerang, come right back. Well, watch this!" shouted Lazer. Lazer threw his sword. It flew over the mountain, stabbed a guard in the heart and then the sword sliced the chest. The sword landing on the floor, right under Lazer. The blade was covered in blood. Lazer picked it up, and examined it. "But how did you do that?" asked Chrono.

"We should run away. I can't live like this. With my strength and your strength, we are unstoppable. And these swords have amazing strength. It's a perfect plan!" shouted Lazer. "Speaking about my blade, i still haven't looked at it" said Chrono. He took it out of its case. The clouds moved away from the sun, the trees became even greener and flowers stood up happily. "Now I know why they call it the legend blade" said Chrono. "So, what do you think about the plan?" asked Lazer. "I don't know. There is a huge chance we can die. We have to train first, we can't just run off like that, its dumb!" said Chrono. Lazermon found some apples on the tree and picked them. "Looks like we found a new breakfast, for now. I do plan to run away, i am not spending the next 50 years rotting in a cave! We have to kill Zedrathol!" shouted Lazer. "You think we can kill Zedrathol?" asked Chrono. "With these swords, we can do anything" said Lazer. "What do you mean?" asked Chrono. But Lazer already ran into the cave and started to munch on his apple. For now, they would live peacefully in their cave.
 
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