Writing The Worst of the Worst - Teapot's LeafGreen Playthrough - Finished. Please give me feedback!!

RE: The Worst of the Worst - Teapot's LeafGreen Playthrough - Chapter 5!

I had a ton of fun making it :3 I just hope it's good ;D
 
RE: The Worst of the Worst - Teapot's LeafGreen Playthrough - Chapter 5!

CHAPTER 6 Part 1: Button-Mashing Grindfest
Chapter 6

6:30 AM. LET’S GET READY FOR SOME POKEMOOOOOOOOOOOON

After along week of break, exams, TCG regionals, and other things, I was happy to be able to pick my DS up again. Then I realized what point of the game I was at. The point where you go make the big loop between Lavender, Fuchsia, and Celadon, in which you are assaulted by more than 50 trainers. If this doesn’t raise your team’s levels up, then I don’t know what will. Anyways, this is going to be a grueling day of A-button mashing, so I jumped right in by going down Cycling Road first. It was quicker, and I wanted to have my 6th pokemon on my team before I started the grueling path between Fuschia and Lavender.

*Teapot has joined #CyclingRoad
<PDC> Man I feel really mean
<PDC> I really need a punching bag
<@Teapot> lol are you still salty that you lost to me back by Pewter
<PDC> Shut up and fight me
*PDC sent out Muk!
<@Teapot> oooh he’s leveled up
<@Teapot> that’s pretty good for a 12-year-old
<PDC> I’M 15
*Teapot sent out Rocket (Ratticate)!
<Rocket> SWEET JESUS
<Rocket> YOU SMELL LIKE LITERAL GARBAGE
<Muk> …that’s because I am literally garbage
<Rocket> lol
<Muk> …you suck
<@Teapot> Rocket, use dig!
*Rocket dug a hole!
<PDC> Muk, use minimize!
*Muk used minimize! Muk’s evasiveness rose!
<@Teapot> BS
<@Teapot> EVASION CLAUSE ISN’T A THING?
<PDC> on a scale of 1 to me raging
<PDC> how mad are you
<@Teapot> somewhere in the middle
<@Teapot> probably about Hyperbeem level
<PDC> top kek
*Ratticate used Dig! It’s super effective!
<@Teapot> didn’t even kill, smh
*Muk used Sludge! Rocket was poisoned!
<Rocket> wow rude
*Rocket used Quick Attack! Muk fainted!
<PDC> UGH THIS GAME IS SO *censored* I CAN’T *censored* BELIEVE THIS *censored*
<PDC> IF I HAD GOOD *censored* POKEMON, I’D
*Teapot has kicked PDC out of #CyclingRoad (calm down breh)
<Rocket> man that guy’s always so salty when he loses
<@Teapot> I know right. Worse than Plato
<@Teapot> so we should probably head out now, right?
<MountainDrew> Nice bike
<@Teapot> thanks
<MountainDrew> hand it over, quick
<@Teapot> what no, gtfo
<@Teapot> Rocket, get ‘em
*MountainDrew sent out Mankey!
<@Teapot> nevermind
<@Teapot> Killer Bee, get ‘em
*Teapot sent out Killer Bee (Beedrill)
*Killer Bee used Fury Attack! Hit 4 time(s)!
<@Teapot> Man, I’m really starting to regret teaching Aerial Ace to Parasect instead….
*Mankey used focus energy! Mankey’s got pumped!
<Mankey> AWW YEAH HYYYYYYYYYPE
<Mankey> WHO ELSE IS HYPED? ANYBODY HYYYPED?
<Mankey> BATTLE HYPE!
*Killer Bee used Fury Attack! Hit 4 time(s)! Mankey fainted!
<@Teapot> I hope mankey gives attack EVs because you really need them
*MountainDrew sent out Primeape!
*Teapot withdrew Killer Bee!
*Teapot sent out Shrooms (Parasect)!
<Primeape> wait are you high?
<Shrooms> WHY DOES EVERYBODY HAVE TO ASK
*Shrooms used Aerial Ace! Primeape fainted!
<@Teapot> GG
<MountainDrew> GG​

I continued my leisure bicycle ride down Cycling Road, and demolished a few more trainers along the way. It was nice to go for a ride right next to the sea, with the breeze flowing through my luscious brown locks. Yeah. Luscious. Also the ride was all downhill so it was literally no work, that’s the best part!!!

*Teapot has joined #FuchsiaCity
Upon my arrival, I immediately went and picked up the good rod. Of course, the man was nice enough to let me fish in his backyard for my very own water-type pokemon!

<@Teapot> hey thanks for the good rod man
<@Teapot> can I catch something out of the pond in your backyard?
<Kronar> I WILL END YOU
<@Teapot> ok thanks!
*Teapot casts line out
*A pokemon’s on the hook!
*Wild Goldeen appeared!
<@Teapot> I mean this CLEARLY has to be my water-type
*Teapot sends out Hungrybox (Jigglypuff)!
<@Teapot> Hungrybox, use sing!
<Hungrybox> you’re insecure
<Hungrybox> don’t know what for
<Hungrybox> turnin’ heads when you walk in the do-o-ooor
<Goldeen> zzzzzzz
<@Teapot> ………….
<Hungrybox> what?
<@Teapot> We’ll talk about this later
*Teapot chucks a PokeBall
<@Teapot> Gotcha! Wild Goldeen was caught!
*Goldeen is now known as Pinky
<Pinky> …really? Pinky? THAT’S the best you can do?
<Shrooms> you’re telling me
<@Teapot> what? I had a goldfish named pinky once
<@Teapot> my sister named it not me
<Pinky> So why would you name me after it?
<@Teapot> the fish was strong af
<Pinky> whatever dude​

Yes, I really did used to have a goldfish named Pinky, which my younger sister named. That sucker lived for FIVE YEARS. Clearly it was a strong goldfish, just like this one is bound to be. Goldeen is a Hardy nature, which I’m not even mad about. I’ve had stupidly good luck on natures for everything minus Ratticate, so I’ll take a neutral. Anyways, I troll around next door, and my interest is piqued

<~omahanime> halph
<~omahanime> halph
<@Teapot> …how the *censored* did you get a boulder into your house?
<~omahanime> nof imforfanf
<~omahanime> I woft mah teef
<~omahanime> an I neet you to ge fem back!
<@Teapot> stop spitting on me
<@Teapot> it’s quite rude
<~omahanime> I CANF
<omahanime> I DON HAF MAH TEEF
<@Teapot> Im forry I fanf unferftanf you when u talf lik dif
<~omahanime> JUST GE ME MAH TEEF
<@Teapot> what?
<~omahanime> MAH TEEF
<~omahanime> TEEF
*omahanime points at mouth
<@Teapot> dude I know I need to get your gold teeth
<@Teapot> I’m just messing with you
*Omahanime has kicked Teapot out of #WardensHouse

*Teapot has joined #SafariZoneGate
<~DNA> o/
<@Teapot> …well poop
<@Teapot> PMJ probably hired you to make sure I didn’t catch anything good did he
<~DNA> actually no, because you need the pokedex filled
<~DNA> to advance to the sevii islands later
<~DNA> I’m just here for the money
<@Teapot> what money?
<@Teapot> …
<@Teapot> SONOFA-
*DNA swipes $500
*DNA gives Teapot 30 safari balls
*DNA has kicked Teapot out of #SafariZoneGate
*Teapot has joined #SafariZone​

I immediately bolt into the tall grass and catch as many pokemon as I possibly can. All of them. ALL. OF. THEM. I finally have the freedom to catch whatever I want. I know that I will never be able to use these pokemon, but it was satisfying nonetheless. Here’s a quick list of all the pokemon I caught and their nicknames:
Nidorino - Giant Rat
Exeggcute - Attraction
Nidoran-Female - Bertha
Rhyhorn - Ralph
Rhyhorn - Gimli
And that’s it because I ran out of steps!!! Anyways, I made it to the far end and found omahanime’s teeth, as well as the HM for surf.

<~Drohn> oh thank goodness
<~Drohn> I was worried you weren’t gonna make it
<@Teapot> bruuuuuh
*Drohn gives Teapot HM03 Surf
*Teapot teaches Surf to Pinky
<~Drohn> Aight cool, I think we’re done here.
*Drohn has kicked Teapot out of #SafariZone
*Teapot has joined #WardensHouse
*Teapot gave the Gold Teeth to omahanime!
<~omahanime> Thank you lassie! You’re a real lifesaver!
<@Teapot> …lassie?
<~omahanime> your character is still a girl you know
<~omahanime> anyways, I guess I should probably give you this
<~omahanime> since you’ve now saved me from Team Rocket
<~omahanime> as well as public humiliation
*omahanime gives Teapot HM04 Strength!
<~omahanime> oh yeah there’s a rare candy behind that boulder
<~omahanime> now get out of my house
<@Teapot> aight o/
*Teapot Teaches Strength to Rocket!
*Teapot grabs Rare Candy
*Teapot has left #WardensHouse​

118.png
Pinky, Lv. 14
[animate]raticate[/animate] Rocket, Lv. 32
[animate]parasect[/animate] Shrooms, Lv. 31
[animate]farfetchd[/animate] Lv. 35
[animate]beedrill[/animate] Killer Bee, Lv. 32
[animate]jigglypuff[/animate] Hungrybox, Lv. 35

And at last the time has come. The extreme button-mashing fest commences in 3, 2, 1…

*Teapot has joined #Route15
<Gale> SURPRISE!
<gamercal> SURPRISE!
<PDC> SURPRISE!
<Bam> SURPRISE!
<Pulse> SURPRISE!
<AugustRush> SURPRISE!
<GODZILLA> SURPRISE!
<@Teapot> wat​

I walk in and am surprised to find several of PB’s old members there greeting me with a massive yell of “SURPRISE!” Instead of several trainers, I find my old friends. This made me truly happy.

<gamercal> we know how long and grueling this part is
<gamercal> so we figured we’d at least join the room to make it easier for you to get through
<@Teapot> wow guys. I really appreciate that.
*gamercal has quit
*Gale has quit
*PDC has quit
*Bam has quit
*Pulse has quit
*AugustRush has quit
*GODZILLA has quit
<@Teapot> …netsplit?
*PBGuest01 has joined #Route15
*PBGuest02 has joined #Route15
*PBGuest03 has joined #Route15
*PBGuest04 has joined #Route15
*PBGuest05 has joined #Route15
*PBGuest06 has joined #Route15
<@Teapot> well it was good while it lasted
<PBGuest01> HEY MY FRIEND CODE IS 99999999999999999999999999993​

So it begins. I wage war on routes 12-15, in an effort that requires my entire team. I start out on route 15 by sending out my freshly caught Goldeen and switching it out immediately so it can gain experience points. Most of these trainers carry either Grass or Flying-types, which means that Parasect, Beedrill, and Jigglypuff get a lot of EXP points. This is good, because they are probably the 3 I will be using the least when I make it to the gym, so they’ll have to get their training in now. (Especially the two Bug-types.) The training is slow and time-consuming, but Pinky the Goldeen makes very steady (albeit slow) progress. By the end of Route 15, it’s up to level 22, and almost ready to hold its own. I also finally used my Moon Stone on Hunbrybox to evolve it into a Wigglytuff. Body Slam is the best move it learns via level-up, so I figured I’d take the extra stats. (Hyper Voice is stronger but I like being able to paralyze stuff.) Then I turned my game off to work on my Music History essay, and forgot to save, so I did this entire route again lol! Afterwards, I flew back to the PokeCenter for the 3rd (6th…..) time, healed up, and pushed north. (After saving my game, of course.)

From here, I push north (finally), where there are multiple birdkeepers and bikers. Wigglytuff makes work of the bird keepers by using Shock Wave, while I use a combination of Goldeen and Ratticate to take out the bikers. Since Goldeen is leveled up, I can use Rain Dance to make her more powerful, just enough to stand up to the weaker poison-types. Further on we come to a maze of fences, the pathways guarded by more birdkeepers and bikers. Lather, rinse, repeat everything I did on the previous route, and I finally make it to the long line of wooden decks (after flying back to the PokeCenter for at least the 5th time after my restart.) Pinky is up to level 27 at this point, but it still can’t even OHKO Koffings with Rain-boosted Surf. (I plucked the Rain Dance TM from route 15.)
On the decks the are surrounded by water in all directions, we obviously find multiple fisherman. Therefore, Parasect with the Giga Drain TM I used on him after getting Celadon’s Gym Badge did some good work here. (Unfortunately, Giga Drain only has 5 PP, but at least Shrooms still carries a water resistance!)There’s also a couple of dudes playing anti-meta with some Electric-types, but Parasect resists that too. GG no re. Drohn also meets me about 80% through to give me a Super Rod, which is cool I guess. And after just a few more fights, I finally make it through the very tiring day of training.

<@Teapot> puff…puff….puff…
<@Teapot> use…horn…attack…plz…win…
*Pinky used Horn Attack! Enemy Horsea fainted!
*Teapot wins the battle!
<PBguest53> aww shucks. GG man, good luck on your journey ahead!
<@Teapot> thanks…man…gasp…
<@Teapot> duck…get…us…out….zzzzzz
*Noble Duck used fly!​

seaking.png
Pinky, Lv. 33, +18
[animate]raticate[/animate] Rocket, lv. 35, +3
[animate]parasect[/animate] Shrooms, Lv. 34, +3
[animate]farfetchd[/animate] Noble Duck Lv. 37, +2
[animate]beedrill[/animate] Killer Bee, Lv. 34, +2
[animate]wigglytuff[/animate] Hungrybox, Lv. 38, +3 and Evolution

Grind-fest completed, I dozed for couple hours (but not before saving !!!!) and then, after Shining Raikou healed me up at the PokeCenter, we are ready for our Gym Challenge!

PART 2: THE GYM
*Teapot has joined #Gym
<@Heavenly_Spoon> well hello there
<@Teapot> oh good, my ban on AlphaNinja lasted
<@Heavenly_Spoon> it did
<@Heavenly_Spoon> I wrote a haikou. *ahem*
<@Heavenly_Spoon> The Leader’s Koga
<@Heavenly_Spoon> He uses the poison-type
<@Heavenly_Spoon> Counter with Psychic
*Heavenly_Spoon bows
<@Teapot> advice guy gives good gym leader advice
<@Teapot> is this real life?
<@Heavenly_Spoon> Ground-types work well too
<@Heavenly_Spoon> but watch out for pesky Levitators
<@Heavenly_Spoon> Mew would be a good choice if you use Psychic-types
<@Teapot> if only I was so lucky
<@Chaos_Jackal> Welcome to Fuschia City Gym!
<@Teapot> you may have killed me in werewolf
<@Teapot> but you will have NO SUCH SUCCESS HERE!
<@Chaos_Jackal> We shall see!
<@Chaos_Jackal> Hey, are you ready with the live stream?
<Spammy> ALMOST!
<@Teapot> there’s a live stream?
<@Chaos_Jackal> Yeah, like they do for upper-level TCG Events
<@Chaos_Jackal> they stream games from the 5th gym and higher
<@Chaos_Jackal> You’re drawing a lot of interest because of your lower-level team
<Rocket> WHO YOU CALLING LOW-LEVEL?
<Rocket> JUST BECAUSE YOU DRESS UP IN A DAMN CAPE DOESN’T ACTUALLY MAKE YOU A NINJA
<Rocket> JUST A DNA WANNABE
<@Chaos_Jackal> rude
<@Chaos_Jackal> anyways, I WILL SHOW YOU THE TECHNIQUES OF A TRUE NINJA MASTER!
<@Chaos_Jackal> Poison bring ssteady doom.
<@Chaos_Jackal> Sleep renders foes helpless
<@Chaos_Jackal> and there’s NO SLEEP CLAUSE!!
<@Teapot> wtf
<@Chaos_Jackal> Despair to the horror of Poison-type Pokemon!


*Teapot sent out Pinky (Seaking)!
*Chaos_Jackal sent out Koffing!
<Spammy> AAAAAND WE ARE LIVE
<Spammy> Whattup twitch
<Spammy> Whattup chat?
<Spammy> Spammy here with the commentary on this 5th-level gym match
<Spammy> Unfortunately, they stuck me with the always-slow Internet Explorer
<Spammy> so I apologize if I’m late on the commentary
<@IE> It’s Ice Espeon. The IE stands for Ice Espeon you turd
<Spammy> Espeon isn’t even an Ice-type though
<@IE> ...ANYWAYS Looks like Teapot is going to get off with that strong
<@IE> ...err…is that a Seaking?
<Spammy> Welp. Teapot off to the not-so strong Seaking lead
<Spammy> Chaos isn’t really doing much better with that Koffing though

<@Teapot> PINKY, USE RAIN DANCE!
<@Chaos_Jackal> *censored* weather
<@Chaos_Jackal> we out
*Koffing used SELFESTRUCT! SEAKING FAINTED!

<Spammy> that’s a bold strategy cotton
<Spammy> let’s see if it pays off for him
<@IE> I guess Chaos thought that Seaking was a legit threat, decided to blow it up right away
<Spammy> I mean I guess he didn’t want a Swift Swimmer to potentially sweep his team
<Spammy> unfortunately, now it’s raining, and I’M GETTING WET
*Teapot sent out Rocket (Ratticate)!
*Chaos_Jackal sent out Muk!
<@IE> uh this guy does know that there are SE types against poison?
<Spammy> damn Spoon, what did you tell this guy when you gave him advice?
<@Heavenly_Spoon> I told him to use Mew!
<Spammy> Well that clearly isn't happening

*Ratticate used Hyper Fang!
*Ratticate's attack missed!
<@Teapot> bs
*Muk used Minimize!
<@Teapot> WTF EVASION CLAUSE ISN’T A THING EITHER?
*Ratticate used Strength! Ratticate’s attack missed!

<Spammy> Teapot, you actually have to HIT to win the battle you know
<@Teapot> working on it
*Ratticate dug a hole!
<@IE> you know when you leave your game lying on your kitchen table
<@IE> and your little brother picks it up and starts clicking random moves
<Spammy> Yeah
<@IE> that’s what Teapot looks like right now
<@IE> clicking his 5th different move in 5 turns
<@IE> “well that one didn’t kill him, let’s try this one!”

*Rocket used Dig! It’s super-effective!
<@Teapot> wtf it’s only a 4HKO

<Spammy> LOL WEAK
<@IE> man big damage coming from the ratticate right now
<@IE> lololol
*Muk used toxic! Ratticate was badly poisoned!
<Spammy> what is this guy doing
<Spammy> That Ratticate could have guts
<@IE> that’s a bold strategy cotton
<Spammy> bruh you’re like 4 days late on that one
*The rain stopped!
<Spammy> THANK GOD THE RAIN STOPPED

*Rocket dug a hole!
*Muk used Minimize!
<@Teapot> gtfo
<@Chaos_Jackal> trololololoolol
*Rocket used Dig! A critical hit!
<Chaos_Jackal> o

<Spammy> Ahh yes, Ratticate getting the critical hit, gonna put in some ACTUAL big damage right now
<@IE> unfortunately, that Ratticate is eating heavy Toxic damage and is low on health
*Teapot used Full Restore!
<@IE> You can get those this early in the game?
<Spammy> ITEM META

*Muk used Sludge! Ratticate lost 50% health!
*Rocket dug a hole!
*Muk used minimize
<@Teapot> NO! I WILL NOT DIE FIGHTING TO A FREAKING EVASION-CLAUSE BREAKER!
*Rocket used dig! It’s super effective!
*Muk fainted!

<Spammy> And there it is, the Ratticate with Dig gets through the evasion boosts
<Spammy> and it gets the kill on Chaos’s Muk
<@IE> Chaos looks a bit flustered in the corner, I think he expected his Muk to do a lot more work
*Chaos_jackal sent out Koffing!
<@IE> bruh
<@IE> if it didn’t work the 1st time
<@IE> It probably won't work the sec-
<@IE> well I guess we didn’t see if it worked the 1st time or not
<@IE> it just blew up

*Rocket used Hyper Fang! Koffing lost 40% health!
*Koffing used Sludge! Ratticate lost 30% health!
<Spammy> Teapot has to think of something, this trade does not favor Ratticate
<Spammy> who’s only left with about 20% health
*Rocket used Hyper Fang! Koffing flinched!
<Spammy> And that will about do it for the Koffing, I think
*Chaos_Jackal used a Hyper Potion!
<Spammy> NOPE JUST KIDDING
<@IE> ITEM META
<Spammy> IE once again with the slow comment
<@IE> shut up

*Rocket used Hyper fang! Koffing lost 35% health!
*Koffing used Sludge! Rocket fainted!
<Spammy> And down goes the Ratticate
<@IE> but not before nearly irreperable damage was done to CJ’s team
<Spammy> Please don’t say that, you’re making me think of CardSlingerJ
<@IE> oh my bad
*Teapot sent out Noble Duck (Farfetch’d)
<Spammy> LOL HE HAS A FARFETCH’D
<@IE> THIS GUY IS GREAT
<Spammy> HEY TEAPOT
<Spammy> IF YOU WIN THIS WITH FARFETCH’D,
<Spammy> I’LL WEAR AN “I <3 ONE DIRECTION” SHIRT NEXT LIVE STREAM

*Noble Duck used Swords Dance!
<@Teapot> Challenge accept-
*Koffing used Selfdestruct!
<@Tepaot> damnit

<@IE> …you lucky son of a bitch
<Spammy> Thank God
<Spammy> my heart LITERALLY stopped for a solid 0.4 seconds
<@IE> AND IT ALL COMES DOWN TO THIS!
<@IE> the 4 on 4 gym battle comes down to the last 1 on either side!
<Spammy> props to that Koffing for finishing off the Ratticate, and blowing up to prevent the +2 sweep
<Spammy> some major strategy from Chaos Jackal there
*Chaos Jackal sent out Weezing!
*Teapot sent out Hungrybox (Wigglytuff)!
<@IE> well this is interesting
<Spammy> I don’t know that I’ve ever seen this matchup before
<Spammy> let’s see how it plays out

*Hungrybox used Sing! Hungrybox’s attack missed!
<@Teapot> how the *censored* do you miss by singing?
<@Chaos_Jackal> poorly trained Wigglytuff IMO
*Weezing used Sludge! Wigglytuff was poisoned!
<@Teapot> welp that sucks
*Hungrybox used Sing! Hungrybox’s Attack missed!
<@Teapot> welp… GG Chaos
<@Chaos_Jackal> GG
<@Teapot> /forfeit

<Spammy> and there you have it! After 2 sing misses in a row, Chaos_Jackal walks away with the victory!
<@IE> man, poor luck on Teapot’s part though, 1 sing hit could have easily won him this game
<Spammy> It looks like Chaos is the victor this time around by a score of 1-0 in this 4-on-4 match
<Spammy> Teapot is resilient though, and he learns fast
<@IE> this is true. He’ll be back with a fresh challenge tomorrow
<@IE> with some better timed Swords Dances or Rain Dances, he might be able to set up a sweep
<Spammy> Until then, I’m Spammy
<@IE> and I’m Ice Espeon
<Spammy> And we are signing off. See you tomorrow Twitch!​
 
RE: The Worst of the Worst - Teapot's LeafGreen Playthrough - Chapter 6 is up!

Just caught up with this.
Worst Best run ever by far. Keep up the good (bad?) work!
 
RE: The Worst of the Worst - Teapot's LeafGreen Playthrough - Chapter 6 is up!

LOL. The twitch streaming thing.... dear god.
 
RE: The Worst of the Worst - Teapot's LeafGreen Playthrough - Chapter 6 is up!

And I'm apparently your co slow-host :0
 
RE: The Worst of the Worst - Teapot's LeafGreen Playthrough - Chapter 6 is up!

CHAPTER 7

Chapter 7

<Spammy> WHAT UP CHAT
<Spammy> We’re getting right into the action today
<Spammy> Teapot’s decided to jump right in after yesterday’s loss
<Spammy> He has wasted no time grinding, talking to Spoon or anything
<Spammy> He is eager to get right back in and avenge his loss
<Spammy> I’m Spammy, and as always, my sidekick Ice Espeon
<Spammy> Who has opted for a much less confusing username today
<Spammy> Congratulations on your recent promotion to Moderator, by the way
<@Ice_Espeon> Sidekick? Plz. But thank you n_n
<@Ice_Espeon> Anyways, it looks like Teapot has jumped right in with the Farfetch’d lead this time
<Spammy> Opting to save his Seaking from getting blown up this time around, I see
<@Ice_Espeon> Looks like Chaos has stuck with the good ol’ Koffing lead

<@Teapot> Noble Duck, power up! You’re going to need it!
*Noble Duck used Swords Dance!
<@Chaos_Jackal> Koffing, use Smokescreen! They can’t hit us if they’re blind!
*Koffing used Smokescreen!
*Noble Duck’s Keen Eye prevented accuracy loss!

<Spammy> Looks like the bird’s accuracy can’t be lowered
<Spammy> I guess you could say that’s
*Spammy shades
<Spammy> Hawkward
<@Spammy> YYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH

*Noble Duck used Secret Power! Koffing lost 95% health!
<@Chaos_Jackal> yeah. No. Sorry.
*Koffing used Selfdestruct! Noble Duck Fainted!
<@Teapot> ugh.

<Spammy> The explosion is here once more
<Spammy> Chaos Jackal doing a great job of showing us why they nerfed this move in gen 5
<@Ice_Espeon> I guess you could say he got
*Ice_Espeon shades
<@Ice_Espeon> Farf-Rekt
<@Ice_Espeon> YYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH
*Spammy bricks Ice_Espeon
<Spammy> Teapot sends out his loyal Ratticate
<Spammy> I think he predicted the- yup! Chaos comes out with Muk!
<Spammy> He probably wants to abuse Dig like he did last time around
<@Ice_Espeon> It will be difficult if it gets the evasion boosts up, though

*Rocket used Dig!
<@Chaos_Jackal> BRUH
<@Chaos_Jackal> I just put new floors in
<@Teapot> Sucks2suck
<@Chaos_Jackal> I guess I’ll just return the rude the.
*Muk used Minimize!
<@Teapot> God why have you forsaken me
*Rocket used Dig! It’s super effective! Muk lost 35% health!
*Muk used Toxic! Rocket was badly poisoned!

<Spammy> Ratticate coming out with the ever-so strong Dig attack for a 4HKO
<@Ice_Espeon> Man Chaos must be REALLY convinced that Ratticate doesn’t have guts
<@Ice_Espeon> he just keeps poisoning it
<Spammy> I think he wants to be able to damage it on the turns it digs down
<@Ice_Espeon> ah, yes.

*Rocket dug a hole!
*Muk used Minimize!
*Rocket used Dig! Muk lost 35% health!
<@Chaos_Jackal> CAN YOU MISS PLZ
<@Teapot> too well-trained imo
*Muk used Sludge! Rocket lost 65% health! Rocket is hurt by poison!
<Rocket> THIS THING’S GOD MORE ROIDS THAN LANCE ARMSTRONG
<Muk> or you’re just weak
*Rocket used Hyper Fang! Muk has 1% remaining!
<Muk> so close and yet so far
<Rocket> BS HAX
*Muk used Sludge! Rocket fainted!

<Spammy> and down goes the Ratticate!
<@Ice_Espeon> You know you’ve got him when he stops smack talking
<@Ice_Espeon> What will Teapot do next, I wonder?
*Teapot sent out Hungrybox!
<Spammy> looks like Wigglytuff is up next
<Spammy> Saving the Seaking, it would appear
<@Ice_Espeon> Yeah, Muk’s got a very solid Special Defense
<@Ice_Espeon> Looks like he wants to get it from the physical side

*Chaos_Jackal used a Hyper Potion! Muk restored health!
*Hungrybox used Body Slam! Muk lost 35% health! Muk became Paralyzed!
<@Teapot> …is it just me
<@Teapot> or is it sad that that did more damage than Ratticate’s super effective attack
<@Chaos_Jackal> and it got the paralysis too
<@Teapot> had I known /that/
*Hungrybox used Body Slam! Muk lost 35% health!
*Muk used Sludge! Hungrybox! lost 25% health! Wigglytuff became poisoned!
<@Teapot> EVERY TIME
*Hungrybox used Body Slam! Muk fainted!
<@Teapot> …finally…
*Hungrybox grew to level 39!
<@Teapot> Ok. We take those here. I’ll take those extra 5 HP
*Chaos_Jackal sent out Koffing!

<Spammy> Looks like Chaos has the second Koffing in play now
<Spammy> do you think he’ll blow it up, or try to save it for the Seaking?
<@Ice_Espeon> Tough call. It would be safer to blow it up now
<@Ice_Espeon> Weezing boasts such a level advantage on the Seaking
<@Ice_Espeon> but if he saves it, he can get a guaranteed win
<@Ice_Espeon> we’ll have to wait and see

<@Teapot> PLEASE HIT PLEASE
<@Teapot> PLEASE BASED GOT LET ME HIT
*Hungrybox used Sing!
<Hungrybox> wake up in the morning feeling like P-diddy
<@Teapot> NOPE NOPE NOPE
<@Teapot> YOU’RE DONE SINGING, I DON’T CARE IF HE STAYS AWAKE
<Koffing> zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
*Teapot used Full heal!
*Chaos_Jackal used Full heal!
<@Teapot> oh
<@Chaos_Jackal> welp
*Hungrybox used Body slam! Koffing lost 50% health! Koffing was Paralyzed!
*Koffing used Sludge! Hungrybox lost 15% health!
<@Teapot> 2ez

<Spammy> looks like the decision to not selfdestruct is not paying off for Chaos here
<Spammy> He’ll be able to finish the koffing off and go into the weezing up 2 to 1
<Spammy> With a pokemon that can cause sleep
<@Ice_Espeon> that’s a great position for Teapot to be in
*Teapot used a Hyper Potion!
<@Ice_Espeon> …the greed though?
*Koffing used Sludge! Hungrybox lost 15% health!
<@Ice_Espeon> oh, ok. Was worth.
<Spammy> Lucky he didn’t selfdestruct

*Hungrybox used Body Slam! Koffing fainted!
<@Teapot> NICE JOB HUNGRYBOX
<@Teapot> Just one left, you’re doing phenomenally
*Chaos_Jackal sent out Weezing!
<@Teapot> no more risks
*Hungrybox used Body Slam! Weezing lost 25% Health! Weezing became Paralyzed!
*Hungrybox was fully paralyzed!
<@Chaos_Jackal> *censored*

<@Ice_Espeon> ooooh Teapot opts to not go for the sleep this time around
<@Ice_Espeon> and his advantage just gets better and better
<Spammy> That Weezing’s got to overcome the paralysis if Chaos wants to win this
<Spammy> Right now he’s looking as weak as PDC out there
<@Ice_Espeon> oof, Spammy with the shots

*Hungrybox used Body Slam! Weezing lost 25% health!
*Weezing used Sludge! Hungrybox lost 40% health!
*Hungrybox used Body Slam! Weezing lost 27% health!
*Weezing was fully paralyzed!
<@Chaos_Jackal> well damn. GG Teapot
<@Teapot> GG
*Chaos_Jackal used Hyper Potion!
<@Chaos_Jackal> PSYCH
<@Teapot> you can use 2 of those?
<@Ice_Espeon> #ItemMeta
<Spammy> #ItemMeta
*Hungrybox used Body Slam! Weezing lost 25% health!
*Muk used Sludge! Hungrybox lost 35% Health! Hungrybox became Poisoned!
<@Teapot> LIVE
<@Teapot> BY ALL THE WILL I CAN GIVE YOU
<@Teapot> LIIIIIIIIIVE
*Hungrybox was hurt by poison! Hungrybox has 5 HP left!
<@Teapot> THAT LEVEL UP HP BOOST THOUGH
<@Chaos_Jackal> laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaame
*Teapot used Hyper Potion! Hungryboxrestored health!

<Spammy> ooooof Chaos came so close to clutching out the Wigglytuff
<@Ice_Espeon> Despite the paralysis even
<Spammy> That +5 HP Level up boost ended up being the difference maker
<Spammy> And now Teapot gets to heal himself up
<@Ice_Espeon> Wow, this game is intense
*Weezing used Tackle!
<Spammy> …um…lolwhat? Is he out of Sludge pps?
*Hungrybox’s Cute Charm infatuated Weezing!
<@Ice_Espeon> LOLOLOL GET TROLLED CHAOS
<Spammy> [X] SHREKT [ ] NOT SHREKT

<@Teapot> THAT’S FOR BREAKING THE EVASION CLAUSE YOU *censored*
*Hungrybox used Body Slam! Weezing lost 25% health!
*Weezing used Sludge! Hungrybox lost 37% health! Hungrybox is hurt by poison!
<@Teapot> FINISH HIIIIM
*Hungrybox used Body Slam! Weezing lost 24.9% health!
<@Teapot> …………
<@Chaos_Jackal> YES
*Weezing was fully paralyzed!
<@Chaos_Jackal> o
<@Teapot> NOW ACTUALLY FINISH HIM
*Hungrybox used Body Slam! Weezing fainted!
<@Chaos_Jackal> GG, for real this time man.
<@Teapot> Yeah, GG. Great game.
*Hungrybox grew to level 40!
<@Chaos_Jackal> OK, now you’re taunting me
<@Teapot> sry
<@Chaos_Jackal> anyways, Soulbadge raises the DEFENSE of your pokemon
<@Chaos_Jackal> and it also lets you use Surf outside of battle
<@Teapot> neato
<@Chaos_Jackal> and here’s a gift from me to you
*Chaos_Jackal gives Teapot TM06 Toxic
<@Chaos_Jackal> good luck on the rest of your quest man
<@Teapot> thanks, see you around!
*Teapot has left #Gym

<Spammy> Welp, there you have it folks! Teapot takes the victory with a solid 2-0 victory
<@Ice_Espeon> That Wigglytuff was definitely the MVP, taking out 3 of Chaos’s 4 pokemon
<@Ice_Espeon> I can’t wait until we se it in action next at the Saffron City Gym!
<Spammy> Same here! Until then, this is Spammy
<@Ice_Espeon> and Ice Espeon, signing off! See you next time Twitch!​

Soulbadge in hand, I head straight to the PokeCenter where SR, graciously as always, heals my team right up to full health. Then, before heading to Saffron, I head right back to the Safari Zone. I caught only 3 different kinds of pokemon last time, and I want another chance. I do need 60ish kinds to get to the islands post game, afterall.

*Teapot has joined #SafariZone
<@Teapot> yeah yeah, DNA. Here’s your 500 bucks
<~DNA> thanks, breh.
*DNA gives Teapot 30 Safari Balls
<~DNA> gl;hf
<@Teapot> CHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGE​

This time around, I take some more time to loiter around and enjoy the terrain. I also pick up most of the items that I wasn’t able to get on the first attempt, and there’s quite a few of them (including an ever-so-important Max Revive!) Here’s a list of what I caught on this time around:

Ra (Venonat, lv. 22)
Twinsies!! (Doduo, lv. 26)
Kokoloko (Nidorina, lv. 30)
Patrick (Slowpoke, lv. 30)
Big Ears (Nidoran Male, lv. 30)

I head to Saffron immediately thereafter, and make the same first stop I always do.

*Teapot has joined #MrPsychich’sHouse
<~DNA> here’s your TM29 Psychic
<@Teapot> Hey can I have th-
<@Teapot> ahposdifjapsdoij
*DNA has kicked Teapot out of #MrPsychic’sHouse​

Afterwards, I was planning on just chilling, but then somebody told me there was a fighting Dohjo in town. Now me, being a 2nd degree black belt, could not pass the opportunity to check it out.

*Teapot has joined #NotAGym
<@Teapot> …nice channel name
<Afro-G> Shut up :’(
<Afro-G> I was once the shining and glorious gym leader of this city
<Afro-G> but then it was all TAKEN FROM ME
<@Teapot> sorry to hear that man
<@Teapot> what happened?
<Afro-G> I was leading the gym like any other day
<Afro-G> but then Keeper of Night and his crew of Psychics came in
<Afro-G> they absolutely demolished me at pokemon
<Afro-G> now nobody will even battle with me
<@Teapot> I’ll battle with you
<Afro-G> you will?
<Afro-G> well then, LET’S GET IT as they say!​

To be honest, Afro-G tried his hardest. Unfortunatley, I have a quad resistance in Beedrill, a regular resistance and a Super-effective move in Parasect, and another pokemon carrying super-effective STAB in Farfetch’d. It just wasn’t a fair fight. My team overpowers his Hitmonlee and Hitmonchan in just a few short Aerial Ace attacks, but he was glad for the fight anyways.

<Afro-G> hey, GG man. Thanks a bunch for the game.
<@Teapot> yeah, GG. No problem.
<Afro-G> I’d like you to take one of my prized fighting pokemon
<Afro-G> As a token of my appreciation
<Afro-G> and so you can always remember the game we had
<Afro-G> Choose whichever one you like!
<@Teapot> Wow, thanks man.
*Teapot picks Hitmonlee
<Afro-G> Good luck on you quest
<Afro-G> And be sure to give Keeper of Night a good beating for me
<@Teapot> Will do!
*Teapot has left #NotAGym​

I nicknamed my Hitmonlee “John” after one of the teachers at my studio. He was at one time the #3 rated point sparer in the world, and his kicks were absolutely absurd and stupidly hard to deal with, so a fitting name for the kicking pokemon. Had I picked Hitmonchan, I would have nicknamed him “Craig” after my studio’s master, because of his extensive boxing background. I digress. I claim Hitmonlee, who ends up being a Brave nature (not that it matters, because I won’t be using him), and heal up at the PokeCenter. I then go to the PokeMart in town, and stock up on Hyper Potions and Revives because next episode is extreme A-button mashing fest episode 2: Silph Co. I will catch you all next time, have a good Halloween PokeBeach!
 
RE: The Worst of the Worst - Teapot's LeafGreen Playthrough - Chapter 7 up for Halloween!

<Afro-G> And be sure to give Keeper of Night a good beating for me
<@Teapot> Will do!
*Teapot has left #NotAGym

soon_honey_beer_bottle.jpg
 
RE: The Worst of the Worst - Teapot's LeafGreen Playthrough - Chapter 7 up for Halloween!

^Lol'd. We'll see, though, it probably won't be a beating. Sabrina has historically been the hardest gym leader for me to beat, even with a normal, powered-up team. There's really no moves that hit her supereffectively this early in the game aside from like Bite. (and twinneedle, assuming Beedrill doesn't get wrecked by Psychic, lol!)
 
RE: The Worst of the Worst - Teapot's LeafGreen Playthrough - Chapter 6 is up!

One Approved said:
<Spammy> Looks like the bird’s accuracy can’t be lowered
<Spammy> I guess you could say that’s
*Spammy shades
<Spammy> Hawkward
<@Spammy> YYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH
It's funny because that's something I'd actually say. Lol.
 
RE: The Worst of the Worst - Teapot's LeafGreen Playthrough - Chapter 7 up for Halloween!

I call bs hax. Who cares to break the Evasion Clause when this guy seems to not give a crap? Also, hack, since Wigglytuff doesn't get Serene Grace.

And I don't break the Evasion Clause anyway. I'm an Ubers player, Ubers has no Evasion Clause. Teapot is a liar.

...I still love him though.
 
RE: The Worst of the Worst - Teapot's LeafGreen Playthrough - Chapter 7 up for Halloween!

Lol you should call out a trainer using a gameshark in one of your episodes.

This is a great read. Maybe I should finish my X run?
 
RE: The Worst of the Worst - Teapot's LeafGreen Playthrough - Chapter 7 up for Halloween!

CHAPTER 8


1:00 AM. Extra early because I need to use the dead of night in order to sneak into Silph Co. Upon arriving, I sized up the building I was dealing with. Glass windows lined up all the way to the top on all sides, eleven floors to the top. Then, I began to plan, along with my Ratticate who is so ironically named “Rocket”. I’m literally plotting to take down the Rockets with Rocket.

*Teapot has joined #SaffronCity
<@Teapot> ok so how can I get into Silph without being noticed
<Rocket> I HAVE A PLAN
<Rocket> in order for it to succeed, I’m going to need a few things
<Rocket> Pepper Spray
<Rocket> Microwaveable Popcorn
<Rocket> half-ops
<Rocket> And omahanime’s gold teeth
<@Teapot> …
<@Teapot> …counter-proposal…
<Rocket> I’m listening
<@Teapot> Shrooms, use Spore on that guard over there!
*Shrooms used spore!
<RocketGuard> zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
<@Teapot> well that was easy
<@Teapot> let’s get it, guys​

Upon my entrance, I survey my surroundings. Big, open space, it should be pretty easy for my team of pokemon to maneuver around in here. This is good. I whip out the schematics of the building that I stole (read as: googled) and locate the Card Key on the 5th floor. Goal in mind, I head out.

*Teapot has joined #SilphCo
<@Tepaot> …you’d think that a criminal mastermind like Juliacoolo
<@Teapot> would put guards by the ONLY ENTRANCE in the ENTIRE BUILDING
<@Teapot> but nah, Anthony’s to cool for that I guess
*Teapot goes up a floor
<@Teapot> Jesus, PMJ, what’s with the creepy music e__e
<Blah237> wtf dude how did you get in
<@Teapot> don’t worry about it
*Blah237 sent out Golbat!
<Blah237> GET HIM!
*Teapot sent out Pinky (Seaking)!
*Pinky used Surf! Golbat fainted!
<@Teapot> zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz​

5 Surfs later, Blah’s team was dismantled yet again. I troll around the early floors for a while and destroy some more noobs. Zubat is all the rage for the rocket grunts, but I begin to appreciate how Nintendo PMJ threw some trainers with other pokemon into this game. I notice that when I play games like Emerald, it’s literally the same 3 pokemon over and over and over again. (Poochyena, Zubat, and Carvanha/Numel.) In this game we at least get Scientists (who mostly use Electric-types) Jugglers (who favor Psychic-types) and some Grunts even who use Fighting-types or Psychic-types. You actually get a surprisingly well-balanced opposition so you can raise your entire team instead of just the same 2 guys. I’m jarred from my thoughts by another familiar face.

<DarkVoid> INTRUDER SPOTTED
*Teapot clap
*Teapot clap
<@Teapot> gj DV, now what are you going to do about it?
*DarkVoid sent out Ekans
*Teapot sent out Pinky!
<Ekans> GRRRRRR GRRRRRR I AM SCARY GRRRRRR
*Ekans’s intimidate cuts Pinky’s attack!
<DarkVoid> your pokemon is scared. What are YOU going to do?
*Pinky used Surf! Ekans fainted!
<@Teapot> zzzzzzzzzzzzz​

3 Surf’s later, DarkVoid’s team was defeated. I continued to troll around the floors, picking up items as I went. Looting team Rocket is quite fun, they just leave a lot of good crap lying around. Unfortunately, there’s a lot of grunts, so looting is a slow and laborious process.

<Lugia123> TEAM ROCKET HAS INFILTRATED SILPH CO.!
<@Teapot> …did you figure that one out all by yourself?
<Lugia123> shut up, it’s the script
<Lugia123> PMJ made me say it >:[
<@Teapot> Consider yourself lucky
<@Tepaot> he made me wear a skirt. :/
*Lugia123 sent out Machop!
*Teapot sent out Pinky!
*Pinky used Surf! Machop fainted!
<@Teapot> zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
*Lugia123 sent out Drowzee!
<@Teapot> PINKY, USE SURF!
*that move is out of PP
<@Teapot> ...umm
<@Teapot> …horn attack?
*Pinky used Horn Attack! Drowzee fainted!
<@Teapot> ok cool
<@Teapot> gg
<Lugia123> sigh, gg​

Trolled around a little while more and got some more stuff. Also the warp panels are fun to take. They make trippy noises when you step on them and then you get zapped to a different floor. I have to flood my team with Hyper Potions to keep them healthy, the little grunts are everywhere, sometimes it seems like they’re coming out of the walls. Then, one in particular caught my attention.

<MichaelXD> I AM ONE OF THE FOUR ROCKET BROTHERS
<@Teapot> …ok dude, you have to watch it with the caps
<MichaelXD> I AM ONE OF THE FOUR ROCKET BROTHERS
<@Teapot> dude what did I just say
<MichaelXD> I AM ONE OF THE FOUR ROCKET BROTHERS
<@Teapot> ok.
<@Teapot> I’m going to ban you for spamming now.
<MichaelXD> NO! I won’t let you ban me!
*MichaelXD sent out Machop!
*Teapot sent out Rocket (Ratticate)!
*Rocket used Strength! Machop fainted!
<@Teapot> type “disadvantage” lel
*MichaelXD sent out Machoke!
<@Teapot> oh, nope, we out
*Teapot withdrew Rocket! Teapot sent out Shrooms!
*Shrooms used Aerial Ace! Machoke fainted!
*Teapot sets mode +b MichaelXD
*Teapot has kicked MichaelXD out of #SilphCo​

I putz around for a little while more, and use the Card Key for maximum trolling. The 3-item sets you get are pretty nifty. The Thunder Wave tutor is also accessible, but I don’t have anybody on my team that I want to teach it to right now. (I think the only one who can learn Twave is Wigglytuff?) Anyways, I could just go right back down to 3rd floor and just do the rival battle + boss battle right now, but where’s the fun in taking the card key, and dipping? Figured I’d take down the entire organization because this is FOR GLORY MODE! Oh, wrong game. We’re gonna take down the entire organization because Team Rocket sucks. And for justice. Or something. Anyways, my putzing around eventually gets me to the 7th floor where suddenly

<MichaelXD2> I AM ONE OF THE FOUR ROCKET BROTHERS
<@Teapot> wtf
<@Teapot> …didn’t Ijust…?
<MichaelXD2> no
<MichaelXD2> I think you have mistaken me for my brother?
<@Teapot> …
<@Teapot> yeah. “brother.” What’s your IP, buddy?
*MichaelXD2 sent out Cubone!
*Teapot sent out Shrooms (Parasect)!
*Shrooms used Giga Drain! Cubone fainted!
<@Teapot> rip
*MichaelXD2 sent out Cubone!
*Shrooms used Giga Drain! Cubone fainted!
<Shrooms> your tears
<Shrooms> are delicious
<@Teapot> ok that’s a little creepy
*Teapot sets mode +b 9184.19391.222222222222.1
<@Teapot> ….the *censored* kind of an IP is that
<@Teapot> whatevs
*Teapot has kicked MichaelXD2 out of #SilphCo​

Surprise surprise, I trolled around some more after this. Found a couple of useful items: TM08 Bulk Up, TM01 Focus Punch, and not just 1, but TWO Max Revives! (not that I can use them in battles like I usually do, but they’re cool!) Then I went up a floor and surprise!

<CyclingRoad> I AM ONE OF THE FOUR ROCKET BROTHERS
<@Teapot> ………
<@Teapot> jesus, you’re worse than Waterboy.
*CyclingRoad sent out Weezing!
*Teapot sent out Shrooms!
*Shrooms used Spore!
*Shrooms used Aerial Ace!
<Weezing> zzzzzzzzzzzzz
*Shrooms used Aerial Ace!
*Weezing woke up! Weezing used Smog!
<@Teapot> lol is that the best you can do
*Parasect became poisoned!
<@Teapot> damnit
*Shrooms used Aerial Ace! Weezing fainted!
<@Teapot> ugh, 9 levels lower and it’s still a 3hko
<@Teapot> what a fat pokemon
*Cycling Road sent out Koffing!
*Teapot withdrew Shrooms and sent out Noble Duck (Farfetch’d)!​

Uh, yeah. Farfetch’d proceeded to use Swords Dance and obliterate the opposition. And I re-IP Banned CyclingRoad/MichaelXD. Dude used a proxy like a champ. No rest for me, though. Went up one floor where I was attacked yet again by none other than:

<CyclingRoad2> I AM ONE OF THE FOUR ROCKET BRO-
<@Teapot> NO
<@Teapot> NO
<@Teapot> NO
<@Teapot> NO
<@Teapot> GO HOME
*CyclingRoad2 Sent out Golbat!
*Teapot sent out Hungrybox (Wigglytuff)!
*Wigglytuff used Shock Wave! Golbat fainted!
*CyclingRoad2 sent out Drowzee!
*Hungrybox used Body Slam! Drowzee fainted!
*CyclingRoad2 sent out Hypno!
*Hungrybox used Body Slam! Hypno fainted!
*CyclingRoad2 was defeated!
<CyclingRoad2> well shoot
<@Teapot> wow this Wigglytuff is strong
<@Teapot> anyways, looks like I’m going to need some special help for this one
<@Teapot> DNA
*DNA has joined #SilphCo
<!DNA> sup
<!DNA> oh, this guy. Figures he’s on Juliacoolo’s team.
<!DNA> been trying to get back at him for like 7 years
*CyclingRoad2 has quit (g-line by DNA: GO HOME AND STAY HOME)
<@Teapot> thx
<!DNA> no prob
*DNA has left #SilphCo​

With that little pest FINALLY taken care of, I can continue pillaging Team Rocket as I go around slaughtering their trainers. I’m up at the 9th floor, so it just took a couple of minutes to run through the top. Also another one of those nifty three-item groups was op. Found a Carbos, a Rare Candy, and an Ultra Ball all in the same spot. I’m pretty sure on different floors I found one of every stat-raising vitamin. After collecting the Zinc on the 11th floor, I head back down to the 9th floor and have my pokemon healed because apparently ShiningRaikou was able to infiltrate Silph too. Not complaining. Then I take the teleportation panel back to the 3rd floor, where I warp again up to the 7th, expecting to make my way to the leader. Instead I get ambushed.

<@PG24> Sup
<@Teapot> You’ve come to take down Team Rocket too?
<@PG24> nah, I’m just here to see if you’re ready to take them down yourself
<@Teapot> …
<@PG24> $1500 I beat you in a battle
<@PG24> and I’m not drunk this time
<@Teapot> man I can’t say no to free money
<@Teapot> even if it is in the middle of an important mission
<@Teapot> all right, lets fight
*PG24 sent out Pidgeot!
<@Teapot> ALL HAIL BIRD JESUS
<@PG24> ALL HAIL
*Teapot sent out Hungrybox (Wigglytuff)!
*Pidgeot used Wing Attack! Hungrybox’s cute charm infatuated Pidgeot!
*Hungrybox used Shock Wave! It’s super effective!
*Pidgeot is immobilized by love!
<@PG24> really? He’s zapping the crap out of you, and you’re just going to stand there?
*Hungrybox used Shock Wave! Pidgeot fainted!
<@Teapot> so since he’s bird Jesus, does he get to rise again, or no?
<@PG24> that would be great
<@PG24> but unfortunately, no.

*PG24 sent out Growlithe!
<@Teapot> lok
*Hungrybox used Water Pulse! It’s super effective!
*Growlithe used Flame Wheel! Hungrybox’s cute charm infatuated Growlithe!
<@PG24> wtf
<@Teapot> damn my Wigglytuff is cute
*Hungrybox used Water Pulse! Growlithe fainted!
<@PG24> all right, let’s try this.
*PG24 sent out Exeggcute!
*Teapot withdrew Hungrybox! Teapot sent out Noble Duck!
<@PG24> wait you actually have a farfetch’d
<@PG24> I thought I was just drunk last time we fought
<@Teapot> you were. But I still have a Farfetch’d
<@PG24> lol I am so sorry
*Exeggcute used Stun Spore! Noble Duck became Paralyzed!
*Exeggcute used Leech Seed!
<@Teapot> oh. This could get annoying.
*Noble Duck flew up high!
*Exeggcute used Reflect!
<@Teapot> laaaaaaaaaaaaaaame. Crit imo
*Noble Duck used Fly! Exeggcute has 2% left
*Noble Duck’s health is sapped by Leech Seed
<@Teapot> laaaaaaaaaaaaame
*Exeggcute used Confusion!
*Noble Duck used Secret Power! Exeggcute fainted!

<@Teapot> OK, nice job! Now we just need to get by the kadabra
*PG24 sent out Alakazam!
<@Teapot> ...good luck; have fun
<@Teapot> rip in peace Noble Duck
<Noble_Duck> wat
<Noble_Duck> wait TAG ME OUT COACH
<Noble_Duck> TAG ME OUT
*Alakazam used Future Sight! Noble Duck is fully paralyzed!
*Alakazam used Future Sight!
<@Teapot> …
<@PG24> misclick
*Noble Duck used Secret Power! Alakazam lost 65% health!
*Alakazam used Future Sight!
<Noble_Duck> nvm we good
<@Teapot> are you specs or something lol
<@PG24> …NO. <_<
*Noble Duck is fully paralyzed! Noble Duck’s health is sapped by Leech Seed!
*Noble Duck fainted!
<@Teapot> oh well, he tried.

*Teapot sent out Killer Bee!
<Killer_Bee> what’s crackin’
<Killer_Bee> I am ready for some act- BLAM
*Killer Bee took the future sight attack!
<Killer_Bee> ow
*Killer Bee used Twinneedle!
<@PG24> wtf he outspeeds?
<@Teapot> Mega Beedrill imo
<@PG24> whatevs
*PG24 sent out Blastoise!
<@Teapot> oh right, you have that.
*Killer Bee used Twinneedle! Blastoise became poisoned!
<@Teapot> EXCELLENT!
*Blastoise used Water Gun!
<@Teapot> wait, is that seriously the only STAB move you have
<Killer_Bee> OH NOOOOOOOOO NOT WATER GUN
<Killer_Bee> Teapot help! Whatever shall I do?
*Blastoise used Protect! Blastoise is hurt by poison!
*Blastoise used Protect! Blastoise is hurt by poison!
<@Teapot> …you know that you’re just taking damage from poison every time that works, right?
<@PG24> shut up I’m trying to think
*Blastoise used Bite!
*Killer Bee used Twinneedle! Blastoise fainted!
<@PG24> ugh
<@Teapot> GG
<@PG24> at least there wasn’t any hax this time really.
<@PG24> gg
<@PG24> good luck against boss rocket!
<@Teapot> thx
<~Drohn> here, have a Lapras!
<@Teapot> …how did you get in here?
<~Drohn> not important
<~Drohn> good luck against JC, I believe in you!
*Lapras is now known as Lap Dance
<LapDance> ……….
<Shrooms> I no longer have any complaints about my nickname!​

After defeating TDL once more, I head back through the warp panel maze to the 9th floor where I heal my pokemon up, and then come all the way back through to the 11th floor where Giovanni aka Juliacoolo awaits. There’s a pesky guard waiting at the door, but I dispose of him rather easily. Farfetch’d > ground-types. I take the revive hidden in the middle plant at the end of the hallway, and then I move forward. Inside the room I see an old man, his wife, and Juliacoolo, who is surrounded by no less than 9 scantily clad women. I had to wait a moment, before we started however

<@Juliacoolo> Ah, Teapot! So we meet again!
<@Juliacoolo> Brave Vesparia and I are discussing a business proposi-
*Phone rings*
<@Juliacoolo> err… I don’t know this number. Give me 1 sec will you?
<@Teapot> yeah, sure.
<@Juliacoolo> Hello?
<@Juliacoolo> Yes, this is he. Who is this?
<@Juliacoolo> You’re MichaelXD’s mom?
<@Teapot> lolwtf
<@Juliacoolo> No, I’m sorry, I can’t unban your son, he created four multiple accounts
<@Juliacoolo> That’s explicitly against the rules
<@Juliacoolo> I don’t care if he’s only 12, he should know to follow the rules.
<@Juliacoolo> don’t yell at me, this isn’t going to get you anywhere.
<@Juliacoolo> No, I don’t want your son to apologize, I want him to leave me alone
<@Juliacoolo> I’m sorry, you……breaking up…..can’t hear you……….can’t…..
*Juliacoolo hangs up
<@Juliacoolo> Sorry about that. Where was I?
<@Teapot> Vital business proposition?
<@Juliacoolo> AH YES
<@Juliacoolo> we’re discussing a vital business proposition. Keep your nose out of grown-up affairs
<@Teapot> bruh I’m older than you are
<@Juliacoolo> whatever just fight me​

Juliacoolo led with his Nidorino, which was an easy 2HKO for my Farfetch’d. I Swords Danced in an attempt to sweep, and promptly KO’d his Nidorino. Unfortunately, he had a Rhyhorn, so the sweep was not meant to be. But because I’m dumb and also absurdly lucky, I decide to stay in and get a crit. I do, but it still only does like 60%. Rhyhorn proceeds to Rock Blast my Farfetch’d in the face for the KO.

Wigglytuff comes out next, an djust Water Pulses for the easy KO. JC Follows up with a Nidoqueen. I figure Water Pulse should do work but it’s not even a 4hko o___o. Nidoqueen tail whips. Fearing Double Kick, I put it to sleep with Sing, and then switch out to Seaking. Seaking hits it with the much more powerful Surf attack, which swiftly 2HKOs the fiend. Juliacoolo’s last pokemon is his patented Kangaskhan. He buys a turn with fake out, but then I set up Rain Dance with Seaking, activating Swift Swim. TBH I’m not sure why I didn’t do this against the sleeping Nidoqueen but whatever. I proceed to repeatedly click surf, and barely manage to take the Kangaskhan out. For some reason, JC thought it was a better idea to use Tail Whip than to KO my Seaking with 10% left. Oh well.

<@Teapot> GG
<@Juliacoolo> ugh bs misclick at the end
<@Juliacoolo> but GG. I will leave, but we WILL MEET AGAIN
*Juliacoolo and TeamRocket have left #SilphCo
<@BraveVesperia> Oh my dear girl!
<@Teapot> bruh, I’m a guy.
<@BraveVesperia> …then why are you dressed in a skirt
<@Teapot> PMJ MADE ME DO IT OK
<@BraveVesperia> Anyways! Thank you so much for saving Silph Co!
<@BraveVesperia> I will never forget that you saved us in our moment of peril
<@Teapot> pff it was nothing. Beating Juliacoolo and PG24 in one mission?
<@Teapot> I’d do it again in a heartbeat
<@BraveVesperia> Here, take this, as a token of our appreciation
*BraveVesperia gives Teapot the Master Ball!
<@BraveVesperia> You can’t buy that anywhere, it’s our secret prototype.
<@BraveVesperia> It will catch any pokemon without fail
<@BraveVesperia> assuming PMJ lets you have it
<@BraveVesperia> That should help you fill the pokedex quicker, I think n_n
<@BraveVesperia> anyways, thanks again for saving us!
<@BraveVesperia> Good luck on your quest!
<@Teapot> Thanks!
*Teapot has left #SilphCo​
 
RE: The Worst of the Worst - Teapot's LeafGreen Playthrough - Chapter 8 up!

> i always lose
> not drunk in /every/ chapter
> not talking about bodacious babes 24/7

unrealistic/10

good read so far though

edit: ctrl+f "dolo" and no results. what the hell sean? >[
 
RE: The Worst of the Worst - Teapot's LeafGreen Playthrough - Chapter 8 up!

Saving it for a special occasion. We can't use up all the tricks too early ;)
 
RE: The Worst of the Worst - Teapot's LeafGreen Playthrough - Chapter 8 up!

CHAPTER 9

After a long day of catching up on sleep, which was refreshing after taking down an entire criminal organization, I was ready to make my next gym challenge. I headed off to the psychic gym, hoping to keep my promise to Afro-G.

*Teapot has joined #gym
<@Teapot> o/
<@HeavenlySpoon> o/
<@HeavenlySpoon> Sabrina’s the leader here, and she uses Psychic-types.
<@HeavenlySpoon> Psychic resists psychic, so Mew would be good.
<@Teapot> rly
<@HeavenlySpoon> Bug-types are also a good option.
<@HevaenlySpoon> Beedrill might actually come in handy here
<@Teapot> oh ok, thanks a bunch!
<@KoN> WELCOME TO SAFFRON CITY GYM!
<@KoN> oh excuse me, the script. Ahem.
<@KoN> read in extremely monotonous voice
<@KoN> oh. I get it.
<@KoN> I had a vision of your arrival
<@Teapot> that’s a bit creepy
<@KoN> I’ve had psychic powers ever since I was a kid
<@KoN> it started with a spoon, carelessly tossed aside, bent.
<@KoN> I dislike battling, but if you wish, I will show you my powers
<@KoN> man, what a lame script. Ready when you are Teapot. Gl;hf
<@Teapot> LETS GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

*ChanServ starts Gym Leader Music!
<Spammy> AND WE’RE LIVE
<@IceEspeon> What’s up twitch? Spammy and Ice Espeon here
<@IceEspeon> commentating this 6th level gym match between Keeper of Night and Teapot
<Spammy> Looks like Keeper is going to lead off with his Kadabra
<Spammy> Teapot’s come out with a Beedrill
<Spammy> Man I really hope that outspeeds, because if it doesn’t, it will g-
*Beedrill used Twinneedle! Hit 1 time(s)! It’s super effective!
*Kadabra fainted!
<Spammy> well that was fast
<@IceEspeon> rip

<@KoN> bs counterteaming imo
<@Teapot> mad
*KoN sent out Mr. Mime!
*Beedrill used Twinneedle! A critical hit! Hit 1 time(s)! It’s super effective!
*Mr. Mime fainted!
<@KoN> BS COUNTERTEAMING IMO

<@IceEspeon> looks like Keeper has his work cut out for him
<@IceEspeon> he’s down to 2 pokemon while Teapot’s got all four remaining
<Spammy> Yeah, he’s also not familiar with Teapot’s team like we are
<Spammy> Teapot could have 3 more Beedrills for all he knows
<Spammy> He must really be feeling the pressure

*KoN sent out Alakapimp (Alakazam)!
<@Teapot> OK, 10/10 solid nickname
<@KoN> please please please please for the love of god outspeed
*Alakazam used Psychic! It’s super effective! Killer Bee fainted!

<@IceEspeon> That, ladies and gentlemen, is a dead Beedrill.
<Spammy> rip
<Spammy> in
<Spammy> pieces
<Spammy> literally multiple pieces

*Teapot sent out Hungrybox (Wigglytuff)!
<@Teapot> good thing Alakazam can’t have Focus Blast this gen
*Alakazam used Calm Mind!
*Hungrybox used Body Slam! Alakazam lost 80% health! Alakazam became paralyzed!
<@Teapot> YES!
*Alakazam’s synchronize paralyzed Wigglytuff!
<@Teapot> oh right. Whatever, wigglytuf is slow anyways
*KoN used Full Heal!
*Hungrybox used Body Slam! Alakazam fainted!
<@KoN> lame

<@IceEspeon> KoN, of all the things you could have done, you went with the full heal option?
<@IceEspeon> is this real life right now?
<KoN> I WAS HOPING FOR A FULL PARA
<Spammy> and how is that working out for you
*KeeperofNight sent out Venomoth!
<Spammy> WAIT YOU HAVE A VENOMOTH
<Spammy> So you have a mon that resists twineedle
<Spammy> and you sent out Mr. Mime instead
<@IceEspeon> and then you risked Alakazam getting outsped
<Spammy> please tell me it doesn’t know a psychic move and that’s the reason why
*Venomoth used Psybeam! Hungrybox lost 15% health
<@IceEspeon> ….
<Spammy> I quit. I literally quit.
*Spammy has left #Gym
<@IceEspeon> well there you have it folks
<@IceEspeon> KoN is going to go down in epic flames to Teapot with what looks like a solid 3-0
<@IceEspeon> I’ll try to find my compatriot before the next gym match and we’ll see you next time
<@IceEspeon> Until next time, this is Ice Espeon and Spammy, signing off!

<@KoN> This loss shocks me
<@IceEspeon> DOES IT REALLY, THOUGH?
<@KoN> I’ll admit I didn’t work hard enough to win
<@IceEspeon> YEAH NO KIDDING
<@KoN> here is the Marshbadge
<@KoN> It makes all pokemon up to level 70 obey without question
<@KoN> take this too
*KoN gives teapot TM04 Calm Mind!
<@IceEspeon> YOU DIDN’T EVEN USE ESPEON
<@IceEspeon> WHAT KIND OF PSYCHIC LEADER ARE YOU
<@IceEspeon> WHY I OUGHTA-
*Teapot has kicked IceEspeon out of #Gym (give the poor guy a break lol)
<@KoN> thanks
<@KoN> anyways, Calm Mind boosts Special Attack and Defense, very good for sweeping.
<@KoN> good luck on your quest Teapot!
<@Teapot> thanks man​

Just in case anybody was wondering, yes, I did win. My Wigglytuff obliterated the Venomoth in 2 Body Slams to take out KoN’s last 2 pokemon. That’s probably the easiest time I’ve ever had against Sabrina in literally my entire history as a pokemon trainer. With the Marsh Badge in hand, I have 0 reason to stick around, so I fly straight home to Pallet Town, and head south to Cinnabar. Oh, I also catch a Tangela in the route directly south of Pallet town to add another page to my pokedex. I nickname it “Devil’s Snare” after the plant in the Harry Potter series.

*Teapot has joined #Route21
<PBGuest623> I got a big haul, wanna go for it!
<@Teapot> sure I’ll fite
*PBGuest623 sent out Magikarp!
<@Teapot> on second thought, I have to be at Cinnabar, and it’s getting late, soooo
<PBGuest623> NOPE IT’S TOO LATE IT’S ALREADY DONE
<@Teapot> *censored*​

I battle the fisherman who, as expected, uses a team of 6 Magikarp. There’s all swimmers and fisherman on this route, so Shrooms gains a lot of levels, which is a good thing considering the next gym-leader is Blaine, the Fire-type user. Parasect isn’t exactly going to be first in line to battle at that gym. When Parasect is out of PP, I switch over to Ratticate. He’s the lowest leveled on my team, and the attack EVs from Goldeen, Seaking, and Gyarados are all good for him. A couple of battles later I was at Cinnabar Island, wherethe tropical weather was refreshing. (At least I think it would be? IDK what the weather is in this game ever.) Almost immediately I’m greeted by the hospitality of one of the locals.

*Teapot has joined #Cinnabar
<GadjetJax> Hiya!
<GadjetJax> I’m an important doctor
<GadjetJax> I can revive pokemon from fossils
<@Teapot> can you revive my Helix Fossil?
<GadjetJax> yes of course
<GadjetJax> ALL HAIL LORD HELIX
<@Teapot> HAIL
*Teapot hands Helix Fossil over to GadjetJax
*Machine makes trippy noises
*GadjetJax hands Omanyte back to Teapot
*Omanyte is now known as LORD HELIX​

I stocked up on Hyper Potions and Revives at the PokeMart, but what I needed most were Full Heals. I nearly ran out of those suckers every time one of my pokemon got poisoned in Silph Co. Next stop was of course the PokeCenter.

<~ShiningRaikou> hey Teapot, glad to see you made it
<~ShiningRaikou> need your pokemon healed?
<@Teapot> yeah, thanks a bunch!
<~ShiningRaikou> So you’re headed off to Pokemon Mansion next I take it?
<@Teapot> yeah, gotta get the key to fight the gym leader.
<~ShiningRaikou> hey, I’m not supposed to tell you who the gym leader is
<~ShiningRaikou> but I can tell you that he’ll probably make a gamble with you.
<@Teapot> will he?
<~ShiningRaikou> yes. DON’T TAKE THE GAMBLE
<~ShiningRaikou> This gym leader is smarter than you are. Heed my warning.
<@Teapot> will do, sir. Now, off to the mansion!
<~ShiningRaikou> good luck + have fun
*Teapot has joined #PokemonMansion​

I remember that when I was in elementary school, this was always my absolute least favorite part of the game, both in the original and in the remakes of these games. Now, I can’t really figure out why. The puzzle isn’t really that difficult, there’s some great items lying around, the burglars give you LEGIT money when you beat them, and the soundtrack is pretty solid. I continue on catch a Grimer. Nicknamed it Al Gore. #ShotsFired. Further along I entertained myself with a battle.

<PBGuest98> w-w-w-w-wah! You startled me!
<PBGuest98> I thought you were a ghost!
*PBGuest98 sent out Ekans
*Teapot sent out Rocket (Ratticate)!
<Ekans> GRRRRRR GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
*Rocket used Dig! Ekans fainted!
*PBGuest98 sent out Ekans!
<Ekans> GRRRRRR GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
*Rocket used Dig! Ekans fainted!
<PBGuest98> even at -2? Wow strong.
<Rocket> YOU KNOW IT
*PBGuest98 sent out Ratticate!
*Teapot withdrew Rocket and sent out Killer Bee (Beedrill)!
*Killer Bee used Brick Break! Ratticate fainted!
<KillerBee> rip
<@Teapot> gg
<PBGuest98> gg​

Deeper into the mansion I press, running away from all the wild pokemon. (Thank god Ratticate has the Run Away ability.) Pretty soon ChanServ started prompting me with some commands. “A secret switch, press it?” uh, duh, hello? Up the stairs I go, where I find a couple of burglars and a scientist waiting for me. I use Rocket and thrash all of them around easily. Caught a Vulpix and nicknamed him Mozilla. I’m funny, hurrrrrr. Caught a Muk and also nicknamed him Al Gore. Then, out of nowhere:

*Wild Koffing appears!
*Teapot sent out Rocket!
*Rocket used Strength!
*Koffing used Selfdestruct! Rocket fainted!
<@Teapot> oh yeah. That’s why I hate this area so much.
*Teapot uses Revive
<PBGuest95> My mentor once lived here
<@Teapot> Cool story bro.
*PBGuest95 sent out Magnemite!
<@Teapot> oh, I see.
*Teapot sent out Rocket!
Tl;dr: Rocket uses dig 3 times and wins
<PBGuest95> Try jumping off one of those ledges there
<@Teapot> …seems legit
<@Teapot> WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
*Thud*
<Rocket> AHH YOU STUPID *censored
<Rocket> YOU LANDED RIGHT ON TOP OF ME
<@Teapot> sry Rocket, but sacrifices must be made
*Rocket grumbles
<@Teapot> now, continuing on…
<@Teapot> wait
<@Teapot> …did I jump down the wrong ledge
<Rocket> .
<@Teapot> I did. I guess I have to do it again lol!
<Rocket> SONOFA
<@Teapot> WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
*Thud*
<Rocket> MY SPLEEN
<PBGuest96> Who are you? There shouldn’t be anybody here.
<@Teapot> SURPRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIISE​

Rocket used his adrenaline rush up on the dude and straight wrecked his team. I kept Rocket in his pokeball for the remainder of my journey through the mansion, for fear of the lives of the other pokemon. I patrolled through the basement and found a Full Restore, as well as a few more trainers. Also, some scientist literally sniped me from OFF THE SCREEN for the battle. Can’t avoid that PBGuet, I guess. Just wanted to tell me that this basement would be a good place for a lab. Okay.jpg. Trolled along and found the Secret Key along with TM14 Blizzard and TM22 Solarbeam. Then I head out and straight to the gym!

*Teapot has joined #Gym
<@HeavenlySpoon> Hey Tepaot
<@Teapot> sup
<@HeavenlySpoon> The gym here is a fire-type gym
<@HeavenlySpoon> Mew can learn any TM, including Earhtquake, so it’s not a bad choice.
<@Teapot> of course it isn’t
<@HeavenlySpoon> Water-types, Rock-types, and Ground-types work as well.
<@HeavenlySpoon> Also, the gym trainers here like riddles
<@HeavenlySpoon> If you answer them correctly, you don’t have to fight
<@Teapot> Wait, there’s gym trainers now?
<GymTrainer01> Stop. Who would cross the Gym of Fire must answer me these questions three, ere the other side he see.
<@Teapot> What is this, Monty Python?
<Gymtrainer01> You could just battle me if you want
<@Teapot> …yeah, I like that option tbh
*Teapot sends out Pinky (Seaking)!​

Seaking clicks the surf button and slaughters every last gym trainer in the building. Didn’t take me more than 10 minutes before I reached the leader.

<@Bacon> Welcome to the Cinnabar Island Gym!
<@Teapot> sup man, how’ve you been
<@Bacon> School keeps my busy, but you know. Been pulling through
<@Bacon> Anyways, as you can imagine, I have some riddles for you, Teapot.
<@Bacon> and I have a little bet to go with them
<@Teapot> I just battled all your gym trainers, but I’ll hear you out.
<@Bacon> If you can answer all 3 of my riddles correctly
<@Bacon> you may fight me without any of PMJ’s silly clauses.
<@Bacon> 6 on 4, evasion clause + sleep clause on, full use of items, etc.
<@Teapot> …I’m listening
<@Bacon> But answer any wrong, and you must abide by normal rules
<@Bacon> in addition, you will not be allowed to use that Water-type that you have.
<@Teapot> seems like a deal to me
<@Bacon> excellent! First question:
<@Bacon> Aside from the webmaster WPM himself, which member lasted on staff the longest?
<@Teapot> easy, PMJ. Dude was staff since like day 1. Even SR hasn’t been here as long as he has
<@Bacon> CORRECT! Question 2:
<@Bacon> In the Smogon Invitational, PokeBeach lost to Pokemon Online forums 3-5.
<@Bacon> Which members won their games against Pokemon Online forums?
<@Teapot> uhh… gamercal?
<@Bacon> that’s one!
<@Teapot> hmm…Pride definitely won. He used team torTERROR against user: kokoloko
<@Bacon> Correct again! TEAM TORTERROR
<@Teapot> the 3rd member… it wasn’t DJ, nor PDC. Nor Steadfast. And Limitles got upset. That means it must have been CClou NO WAIT! It was Alakapimp, wasn’t it?
<@Bacon> dang, thought I had you there. Alakapimp is correct, Steadfast did not make the forum team, and CCloud lost in a very exciting game.
<@Teapot> I thought these were gonna be legit riddles, but these are just trivia questions
<@Bacon> RIDDLE NUMBER 3: YOU ASKED FOR IT!
<@Teapot> oh god

<@Bacon> A prison guard has 3 prisoners, one with two eyes, one with one eye, and one who is blind. This guard also has 5 hats: 3 white and 2 red. He blindfolds the prisoners, puts 1 hat on each of them, un-blindfolds them, and says “if you can guess what color hat you are wearing, you can go free. However, to prevent any lucky guesses I warn you, if you guess wrong, I will execute you here and now.” First he asks the man with 2 eyes. The man, not wanting to risk his life to a guess, says he does not know. The guard then turns to the man with one eye. He also does not want to risk his life on the guess, so he says he does not know.

<@Teapot> Jesus Christ how long is this riddle

<@Bacon> The guard doesn’t bother to offer the terms to the blind man, because he cannot see. However, the blind man asks for a chance to guess. So in the spirit of fairness, the prison guard gives him the opportunity all the same. The blind man replies: “I do not need my eyes to see, the hat on my head is clearly _______.” What color hat is the blind man wearing, and how did he know?

<@Teapot> ………*censored* you I can’t believe I let myself get talked into not using my water-type
<@Teapot> ShiningRaikou even warned me.
<@Teapot> I do not know the answer to this riddle.
<@Bacon> I’m Blaine so I have to do this.
<@Bacon> HAH! YOU BETTER HAVE BURN HEAL!
<@Bacon> BATTLE IT IS, NO WATER-TYPE POKEMON FOR TEAPOT!
<@Bacon> good luck and have fun!
<@Teapot> same to you, friend!
<Spammy> AAAAAND WE’RE LIFE FROM CINNABAR ISLAND
<Spammy> Spammy here, Ice Espeon commentating by my side as always
<Spammy> Hopefully we’ll see a better match here than we did in Saffron city
<@IceEspeon> I don’t even want to talk about that match right now.
<Spammy> LOL RIGHT? Anyways, looks like Teapot leads with Farfetch’d
<Spammy> He probably wants to get the boosts up before the heavy hitters are out
<@IceEspeon> Bacon on the other hand leads with Growlithe
<@IceEspeon> Smart lead, he figured Teapot, being down a Water-type
<@IceEspeon> would probably lead some kind of physical pokemon, so he gets the attack drop in immediately.

<Growlithe> GRRRRRR GRRRRRRRRRRRR
*Noble Duck’s attack was cut by Growlithe’s intimidate!
<@Teapot> We know how to counteract that, right Duck?
*Noble Duck used Swords Dance! Noble Duck’s attack sharply rose!
*Growlithe used Fire Blast! Noble Duck lost 60% health!
*Noble Duck used Secret Power! Growlithe fainted!

<@IceEspeon> First Blood to Teapot, the +1 STAB Secret Power doing work on that Growlithe!
<Spammy> Looks like Bacon comes out to Ponyta, hoping to outspeed without getting his big hitters in
*Noble Duck used Secret Power! Ponyta lost 95% health!
<Spammy> Welp, it doesn’t outspeed, but it did survive the hit! That’s just as good, I think!
*Ponyta used Fire Blast! Noble Duck fainted!
<@IceEspeon> yep, that would be a roasted duck now. Good meat for dinner.
*Teapot sent out Killer Bee!
<@IceEspeon> Oh, that’s actually a very smart move by teapot!
<@IceEspeon> He knows that without his Water-type, he’ll have to use a bug eventually
<@IceEspeon> So he sends bedrill in to get the quick revenge kill on Ponyta!
*Bacon used a Hyper Potion! Ponyta restored health!
*Killer Bee used Brick Break! Ponyta lost 45% health!
<@Teapot> fuuuuu
<Spammy> THERE IT IS CHAT! PRESS 1 FOR ITEM META
*Killer Bee used Brick Break! Ponyta lost 49% health!
*Ponyta sprung up high!
<Spammy> …eh?
*Killer Bee used Agility! Killer Bee’s speed sharply rose!
*Ponyta used Bounce! Killer Bee lost 95% health!
<@Bacon> oh poop, it didn’t kill
<@Teapot> FINISH HIM
*Bacon used a Hyper PotioN!
<@Teapot> gdi
*Killer Bee used Brick Break! Ponyta lost 55% health!
<@IceEspeon> the damage roll though.
<@Bacon> oh. Dangit.
*Killer Bee used Brick Break! Ponyta fainted!
<Spammy> all that for that
<Spammy> Killer Bee gets the KO on Ponyta as expected. What will bacon use next?

<@Bacon> IT’S NOT OVER YET TEAPOT
*Bacon sent out Rapidash!
*Killer Bee used Brick Break! Rapidash lost 35% health!
*Rapidash used Stomp! Killer Bee fainted!
<@Teapot> hmmmm

<Spammy> Rapidash gets the revenge kill on Beedrill, and Teapot is still in quite the dilemma.
<@IceEspeon> Yes he is. So seaking can’t be used.
<@IceEspeon> And teapot definitely doesn’t want to use Parasect. That leaves Ratticate and Wigglytuff.
<@IceEspeon> Wigglytuff has Water Pulse, but it has a poor physical defense
<@IceEspeon> Which means it would take heavy damage from Take Down, and then ExtremeSpeed
<@IceEspeon> Ratticate on the other hand will probably outspeed, but even Dig probably won’t KO the Rapidash
<@IceEspeon> Which leaves Wigglytuff potentially alone to take on 2 pokemon that both outspeed
<Spammy> Let’s see what Teapot goes for.

*Teapot sent out Rocket!
*Rocket dug a hole!
*Rapidash used Fire Blast! Rapidash’s attack missed!
*Rocket used Dig! Rapidash lost 60% health!
*Rapidash used Fire Blast! Rocket lost 65% health!
<Spammy> AMAZING! Teapot’s Ratticate lived the Fire Blast, and is in a perfect position to nab the KO!
*Rocket used Quick Attack! Rapidash fainted!
<@IceEspeon> Looks like no item meta for Bacon this time around
<@IceEspeon> But it’s not over yet folks
*Bacon sent out Arcanine!
<Arcanine> …
<Arcanine> >:]
*Arcanine lets out a mighty roar
<Rocket> SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT
*Arcanine’s Intimidate cuts Ratticate’s attack!
<@Teapot> Yeah, just use Quick Attack, only thing that gets by Espeed. Ur done rip in pieces.
*Ratticate used Quick Attack! Arcanine lost 5% health!
*Arcanine used Take Down! Ratticate fainted!
*Teapot sent out Hungrybox (Wigglytuff)!

<Spammy> And it all comes down to this, once again! 1 on 1 in the 4 on 4 challenge!
<Spammy> Hungrybox the slayer of dreams vs Arcanine the mighty beast
<Spammy> It doesn’t get any better than this, chat!

*Arcanine used Fire Blast! Wigglytuff lost 60% health!
*Wigglytuff used Water Pulse! Arcanine lost 40% health!
<@Teapot> oh. Shit.
<@Teapot> miss plz
<Spammy> HERE COME THE ITEMS
*Teapot used a Hyper Potion! Wigglytuff restored health!
*Arcanine used Fire Blast! Wigglytuff lost 60% health!
<@Teapot> MISS PLEASE
*Teapot used a Hyper Potion! Wigglytuff restored health!
*Arcanine used Fire Blast! Wigglytuff lost 60% health!
<@Teapot> last chance, PLEASE MISS!
*Arcanine used Fire Blast! Wigglytuff fainted!
<@Teapot> damn, rip me. GG bacon.
<@Bacon> GG, I assume I will see you again soon, man!

<@IceEspeon> Well, there it is chat! Teapot suffers his second defeat of the game at the hands of one of PB’s finest, Bacon!
<@IceEspeon> He won’t stay down long, though. That Seaking will be back for revenge next time around, I’m sure of it.
<Spammy> We will see you next time, chat! Until then, Spammy and Ice Espeon, singing off!
<Spammy> Good night from Cinnabar!​
 
RE: The Worst of the Worst - Teapot's LeafGreen Playthrough - Chapter 99999!

The awnser to that riddle is clearly black because it's DNA undercover trying to troll you.
 
RE: The Worst of the Worst - Teapot's LeafGreen Playthrough - Chapter 99999!

bacon is the only one tough enough to beat this hax king... truly one of PB's finest.

About the riddle...

Since the two-eyed prisoner took no guess, it means either the one-eyed or the blind prisoner have a white hat (or both), otherwise, with two red hats in sight, the two-eyed prisoner would win. The one-eyed prisoner won't take a guess as well, however. This means that, again, he sees at least one white hat.
The blind man's hat is white. Why? If the blind man's hat was red, it fits with the two-eyed man's reluctance to guess, since it's still possible that the one-eyed man has a white hat and as such the two-eyed man didn't want to risk a guess. However, in this case, the one-eyed prisoner would have been able to realize that his hat was white, since he also sees the blind man's red hat and concludes that the reason the prisoner before him didn't guess was the one-eyed man's hat color being different than the blind man's red. As we all know, the one-eyed man didn't take a guess. The only way for both the two-eyed and one-eyed prisoner to have everything depend on luck and therefore do not guess is for the blind man's hat to be white.
 
RE: The Worst of the Worst - Teapot's LeafGreen Playthrough - Chapter 99999!

CHAPTER 10

*Teapot has joined #Gym
<@Bacon> Welcome back, Teapot!
<@Teapot> Thx
<@Teapot> Where’s the livestream?
<@Bacon> something about TDL challenging the 8th gym
<@Bacon> Higher level takes precedence
<@Teapot> BS no way he’s there already
<@Bacon> Anyways, I have 3 more riddles for you, and-
*Teapot send out Pinky (Seaking)!
<@Teapot> *censored* you and *censored* your fire-types
<@Bacon> oh well at least I tried
*Bacon sent out Growlithe!
<Growlithe> grrrr grrrr
*Seaking’s attack was cut by- oh let’s just cut to the chase shall we
*Seaking used Rain Dance!
*Seaking used Surf! Growlithe fainted!
*Seaking used Surf! Ponyta fainted!
*Seaking used Surf! Rapidash fainted!
*Seaking used Surf! Arcanine lost 95% health!
<@Bacon> LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE
*Arcanine used Take Down! Arcanine’s attack missed!
<@Bacon> welp gg
<@Teapot> gg
*Seaking used Surf! Arcanine fainted!
<@Bacon> I have burned down, not even ashes remain, blah blah blah
*Bacon gives Teapot the Volacnobadge
*Bacon gives Teapot TM38 Fire Blast
<@Bacon> Volcanobadge heightens your pokemon’s special stats
<@Bacon> Also Fire Blast works best on Fire-types
<@Bacon> Or pokemon that need some help beating grass
<@Bacon> I don’t understand why my script says to not waste it on a water-type
<@Bacon> If your water-type can learn fire blast, teach it fire blast.
<@Bacon> Anyways, good luck on your quest Teapot! I wish you the very best!
<@Teapot> Thanks, Bacon! I’ll see you around!
*Teapot has left #Gym

<!WPM> Hey, if it isn’t Teapot!
<@Teapot> oh hey WPM. What’s up?
<!WPM> Long time no see!
<!WPM> My friend invited me out to One Island
<!WPM> since you happen to be here, how would you like to come with?
<@Teapot> Tropical paradise free of charge with the webmaster
<@Teapot> yes plz
<!WPM> All right then, let’s go!​

The boat ride is luxurious. There is no expense spared for the webmaster’s cruise ship. It speeds across the water very smoothly, and there’s food of all kinds on board. I devour a very large amount because I don’t think my character has eaten since I set out from Pallet Town. Soon enough, the boat slows and pulls into the harbor of One Island.

*Teapot and WPM have joined #OneIsland
<!WPM> This is One Island
<!WPM> There are several islands around here and this is One of them
<!WPM> …gettit
<!WPM> ONE of them
<!WPM> because it’s ONE Island
<!WPM> huehuehue
*Teapot facedesk
<!WPM> anyways, my friend peer sent the boat to pick me up
<!WPM> he’s in charge of the island’s PC System out here
<@Teapot> who’s bright idea was that?
<!WPM> let’s go see him!
<@Teapot> k
*Teapot and WPM stroll over to the PokeCenter
<!WPM> hey man
<!peer> WPM! I can’t believe you came all the way out here
<!WPM> No distance to far to get the site running properly
<!WPM> How’s it going along out here?
<!peer> Mostly fine, I just can’t seem to get the chat room to work
<!peer>Every time I try something setting it up, it crashes
<@Teapot> peer broke the network
<@Teapot> what a surprise.
<!peer> what was that?
<@Teapot> Hm? What? I didn’t say anything.
<!WPM> I bet I can get the chat room up and running
<!WPM> Teapot, can I get you to wait around a while?
<!WPM> Actually, can I get you to run to Two Island and deliver this to my friend?
<!WPM> kthxbye
*WPM hands Teapot a Meteorite
*Peer hands Teapot a Tri-pass
*WPM has kicked Teapot out of #OneIsland



*Teapot has joined #TwoIsland
<BreakfastCereal> Now where’s Lostelle gotten to today?
<BreakfastCereal> She always brings me lunch about now
<BreakfastCereal> Hm? Are you a friend of Lostelle’s?
<@Teapot> who the hell is Lostelle?
<BreakfastCereal> Will you search Three Island for me?
<@Teapot> …sure?
*Sonicmoj has joined #TwoIsland
<@Teapot> wtf
<Sonicmoj> YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET! I’M BACK
<Sonicmoj> AND THIS TIME I BROUGHT MY ENTIRE XENTEEN CLUB WITH ME
<Sonicmoj> WE’RE TAKING OVER THIS PATHETIC THREE ISLAND
<BreakfastCereal> Bruh this is Two Island gtfo
<Sonicmoj> IM SORRY THESE ISLANDS ARE CONFUSING OK 
*Sonicmoj has left #TwoIsland
<@Teapot> ...well shit
<@Teapot> guess I'm off to Three Island
*Teapot has left #TwoIsland​

Not exactly how I expected to spend my vacation in the tropical islands. First I’m booted off of One Island to be a delivery boy, then I have to go chase down a troll that somehow unbanned himself and is now loose on the islands. Also I apparently need to find Lostelle. I dipped and headed out for Three Island immediately, anxious to see what the Xenten club was all about. My worst fears were realized. The island had troll bikers everywhere, and I was going to have to ban every one of them.

*Teapot has joined #ThreeIsland
<@Teapot> …oh you’ve got to be kidding me
<Sonicmoj> FREEEEEEDOM
<SonicmojXD> SWEET SWEET FREEEEEEEDOM
<@Teapot> how the *censored*
<@Teapot> you know what? Nope, I don’t want to know.
<gamercal> get out of our islands man
<GODZILLA> Yeah. We didn’t do anything to you.
<Sonicmoj> I just got here pal. I’m not going anywhere just yet.
<@Teapot> HEY! LEAVE GAMERCAL AND GODZILLA ALONE
<@Teapot> 1V1 ME IRL
<Sonicmoj> seems legit
*Sonicmoj sent out Koffing!
*Teapot sent out Noble Duck!​

Over the course of the next 3 matches, I take care of Sonicmoj’s 3 troll accounts: Sonicmoj, Sonicmoj2, and SonicmojXD “WHICH STANDS FOR NEXT GENERATION!” They weren’t hard matches, but 3 in a row without being able to use any items is brutal on any team (especially one without Ground or Psychic-types!!) My Farfetch’d is left with under 30% health, and it’s poisoned. To make matters worse, the big bad boss decided it was his time to step in.

<@Sonicmod> I’ve been watching you and I’d say you’d done enough
<@Teapot> …wait is your username-
<@Sonicmod> THAT’S RIGHT YOU FOOL! No longer am I sonicmoj
<@Sonicmod> but sonicMOD!
<@Sonicmod> When we moved into a new home and got a new IP, it was the perfect time for me to create a new account
<@Sonicmod> one with MODERATOR POWERS
<@Sonicmod> and when I’m finally done with this island
<@Sonicmod> I will unleash all of my alternate accounts onto the PokeBeach forums
<@Sonicmod> and WE WILL RULE
<@Teapot> Not if I have anything to say about it.
*Teapot sent out Noble Duck!
*Sonicmod sent out Weezing!
*Noble Duck used Secret Power! Weezing lost 25% health!
*Weezing used Sludge! Noble Duck fainted!
<@Sonicmod> YOUR TEAM WILL PERISH TEAPOT
<@Sonicmod> unless you wish to join me
<@Sonicmod> the offer I gave you back on Nugget Bridge still stands
<@Sonicmod> Join me and we will rule the forums!
<@Teapot> I WILL NEVER JOIN YOU
<@Teapot> Partially because the game’s programming won’t allow me to
<@Teapot> But also because I stand with the forums. With WPM and SR and Drohn
<@Teapot> With the Chillax Zone and the Werewolf games
<@Teapot> with JUSTICE
<@Teapot> and other stuff
<@Teapot> idk man let’s just fight
*Teapot sent out Hungrybox (Wigglytuff)!
*Hungrybox used Body Slam! Weezing lost 40% Health!
*Weezing used Sludge! Wigglytuff lost 25% health!
*Hungrybox used Body Slam! Weezing fainted!
*Sonicmod sent out Muk!
<@Sonicmod> Now, we crush them.
*Wigglytuff used Body Slam! Muk lost 45% health!
*Muk used Minimize! Muk’s evasiveness rose!
<@Teapot> DARK STRATEGY WILL NOT AVAIL YOU
<@Teapot> GO BACK TO THE ABYSS
<@Sonicmod> k gandalf
*Hungrybox used Body Slam! Muk lost 45% health! Muk became Paralyzed!
<@Sonicmod> uh-oh
*Muk used Sludge! Wigglytuff lost 25% health!
<@Sonicmod> MISS PLZ
<@Teapot> plz, you think I’m not prepared for your evasion gimmicks?
*Wigglytuff used Shock Wave! Muk fainted!

<@Sonicmod> So uh, I think I'm gonna just go-
<@Teapot> I CALL UPON THE POWER OF THE WEBMASTER
*Teapot has invited WPM to join #ThreeIsland
*WPM has joined #ThreeIsland
<@Teapot> Webmaster WPM, these fiends have threatened the forums
<@Teapot> I only ask that you smite them so that we might be rid of these fools forever
*WPM cracks knuckles
<!WPM> avert your eyes and cover your ears.​

The ensuing scene was so terrible and horrifying that I dare not relive it. I opened my eyes against WPM’s command for one brief moment and I was nearly blinded. The picture will forever be burned into my head, as for a brief moment I glimpsed upon the awesome power of WPM smiting the lowly member into the abyss, never to be seen again. Rip in pieces, Sonicmod. Rip in pieces. When it was over, I opened my eyes, and there was naught left but ash and smoke. Thus I learned: do not anger WPM.

<!WPM> well that was fun.
<!WPM> Good luck with whatever it is you’re doing here!
*WPM has left #ThreeIsland​

Onwards I go, towards Berry Forest, which has several pokemon pages that I add to my pokedex. The trainers are pretty strong here too, which is great for leveling my team up. With the elite four on the horizon, I want to grind as much as possible. Also just a side note, at this point in the game, the PC is fixed. I wonder if I could just leave the islands right now and leave Lostelle to fend for herself. I’ve never actually tried it. Anyways, moving forward, I wind my way through berry forest, and find Lostelle in a patch of grass. Here’s a list of the pokemon I catch before I reach her:
Pika’s Bane (Bellsprout)
Pedophile (Hypno)
Valiant (Pidgey)
Bird Jesus (Pidgeotto, which gets Rare Candied to a Pidgeot)
Adm. Ackbar (Weebinbell, leaf stoned into Victreebell)

*Teapot has joined #BerryForest
<PDC> why the hell am I cast as a little girl
<@Teapot> Probably because you’re like 12 years old
<PDC> 15 YOU LITTLE *censored*
<PDC> Anhyways save me from the pedophile pokemon
<PDC> It’s scary
<PDC> The walls are closing in
<PDC> blah blah blah
<@Teapot> ok I got dis
*Wild Hypno appears!
*Teapot sends out Hungrybox (Wigglytuff)!
*Wigglytuff used Body Slam! Wild Hypno fainted!
<@Teapot> Staples. That was easy
<PDC> strong af
<@Teapot> y
<@Teapot> all right let’s blow this popcorn stand
*Teapot and PDC have left #ThreeIsland
*Teapot and PDC have joined #TwoIsland
<BreakfastCereal> YOU RESCUED MY LOSTELLE
*BreakfastCereal wraps PDC up in a massive hug
<PDC> HEY LEGGO
<PDC> I’m not your daughter
<PDC> gtfo
<@Teapot> this is for you too
*Teapot hands Meteorite over to BreakfastCereal
<BreakfastCereal> gee thanks, you really know how to make a guy happy
<BreakfastCereal> here, have this in return
*BreakfastCereal gives Teapot a Moon Stone
<BreakfastCereal> All right, I’ll get the game corner up and running, come back soon with a friend!
<@Teapot> k
*Teapot has left #TwoIsland​

I head back to One Island and before leaving, troll the living Jesus out of the trainers here. There’s lots of fighting-types, so I stick to Beedrill and Shrooms most of the time, the attack EVs being very nice to have. I also caught some new pokemon:
‘Murica (Fearow)
Paco (Ponyta)
is rock (Geodude)
Friend (Tentacool)
Taylor (Meowth)
Secretariat (Rapidash)
is rug (Persian)
Eugene (Krabby)
Dmaster (Gyarados)
Hey! Hey! (Kingler)

I found Drohn in the Ember Spa. My pokemon were refreshed by the spring water, and Drohn had some breaking news for me.

<~Drohn> Well, first things first.
*Drohn gives Teapot HM06 Rock Smash!
<~Drohn> That shatters boulders as if they were crackers.
<~Drohn> Anyways, there’s been some trouble just a little bit to the north of here.
<~Drohn> It seems some kind of fiery pokemon is re-activating the volcano
<~Drohn> and we need a trainer to stop it
<@Teapot> So you want me to catch Moltres?
<~Drohn> No, silly! The rules in the OP of this playthrough state you have to kill it!
<@Teapot> …wat
<~Drohn> “The object is to triumph over all hardships with your team. Therefore all legendaries must die.”
<@Teapot> …laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaame
<~Drohn> While you’re at it you should probably knock off the pesky birds in the Power Plant and Seafoam Islands too!
<~Drohn> See you later teapot!
<@Teapot> sigh. o/​

Depressing news that I can’t use the awesome nicknames I had planned for the 3 legendary birds (PK Fire, PK Thunder, and PK Freeze for the birds, and eventually PK Flash for mewtwo, refrencing the Explosion set that was popular in a Nintendo format, Journey Across America.) But, rules are rules. The legendaries must die. Anyways, I use the Rock Smash HM on my newly-caught Geodude, and pick up all of the items lying about behind the boulders (a Carbos and an Ether.) Afterwards, I figure I better get some rest before I set out on my challenge, so I save the game and will resume from here next week! Until next time, Pokebeach!

EDIT: Just in case anybody's wondering, I only updated the tag to PG-13 because of the language. I'm not sure how the requirements work here in the Writer's Cafe, so I just wanted to be safe.
 
Back
Top