So I don't know really but recently I have really been wanting a boyfriend. I generally feel very lonely and just want some romance and for the first time not a forced relationship. I go to an all boys school and I don't know anyone thats gay like me. Please help!
Tips on Getting a Boyfriend (For a Guy)
- Thread starter ShinyPhanpy
- Start date
I came on here for the second time to read up about some new releases and saw this on the way and since gay / went to a UK all boys school I thought i'd reply lol
It's probably harder in an all boys school to get a boyfriend than any other (even though most people wouldn't think that) no one in my 5 years at my school came out until right at the end, probably out of fear of other guys or something idk
Are you out? If you are that'd probably help, if not you might just have to watch out of generally hint and hope to get a catch
Though I would have to say your best chances are probably going to be outside of your school, through mutual friends or social media
Being a gay is tough even moreso when you want to find romance, just stick it out and you'll find someone!
It's probably harder in an all boys school to get a boyfriend than any other (even though most people wouldn't think that) no one in my 5 years at my school came out until right at the end, probably out of fear of other guys or something idk
Are you out? If you are that'd probably help, if not you might just have to watch out of generally hint and hope to get a catch
Though I would have to say your best chances are probably going to be outside of your school, through mutual friends or social media
Being a gay is tough even moreso when you want to find romance, just stick it out and you'll find someone!
I feel your pain </3 I go to a mixed school, and I'm in the same boat as you in-school; there are a few gay girls out of the closet, but I'm the only guy, so there was no chance of me finding love there. However, I'll mostly echo @HarlemThorne here, because if there's no one you want to date in-school, you'll have to find someone out of school if you'd like a partner. Just go to a few parties and socialise a bit; usually the hosts of the party invite friends they know from places besides school, or siblings are brought along etc.. You don't necessarily even need to go to a proper extra-curricular organisation.
I will also agree with Harlem that it will be easier to find a date if you come out yourself, because people feel like they can talk to you better if you do. When I first came out I had two guys talk to me about them possibly being bi. They weren't in the end, but somehow it just makes you more approachable.
No matter what you do, I wish you the best of luck!
I will also agree with Harlem that it will be easier to find a date if you come out yourself, because people feel like they can talk to you better if you do. When I first came out I had two guys talk to me about them possibly being bi. They weren't in the end, but somehow it just makes you more approachable.
No matter what you do, I wish you the best of luck!
Last edited:
Mhmm you'd be really surprised at how much of a homing beacon you become once you're out. I came out around the end of school and so many guys that were still closeted would text me / talk to me about being gay, dating etc all that stuff because they obviously weren't out and none of us really knew anyone who was out, I don't think many people would've really cared but I guess we all have the worry that people might. Now that i'm 20 and most people from my class are, it seems to be the time when most have people come out - though of course I wish more people had when I was in my early teens, felt a little left out everyone had boyfriends and girlsfriends and I had my copy of Pokemon Diamond on DS lol (Not that he was ever a bad lover )
Also, with technology nowadays you might end up finding someone on a forum, facebook group, etc - you'd be surprised at how often you're close to someone, the amount of friends i'd end up meeting online through groups / forums to do with my interests in music, video games, etc that also ended up living in London like I did was strange
Never limit yourself to the norms of finding someone at school
) Also, with technology nowadays you might end up finding someone on a forum, facebook group, etc - you'd be surprised at how often you're close to someone, the amount of friends i'd end up meeting online through groups / forums to do with my interests in music, video games, etc that also ended up living in London like I did was strange
Never limit yourself to the norms of finding someone at school
Okay thankyou everyone!
Yes I have come out to my class, which should make this process a little easier.
So far no one else has come out in my class and it isn't looking like anyone will, but hopefully I will be able to get one through my friends friend.
Yes I have come out to my class, which should make this process a little easier.
So far no one else has come out in my class and it isn't looking like anyone will, but hopefully I will be able to get one through my friends friend.
I'm not gay, but I know that there's some dating apps/websites, so maybe you could try them. If your not willing to try dating websites, then maybe just try to meet new people. Good luck!
Aww, This is super sweet!
All I can say,is do YOU. Maybe talk to your school about creating a GSA (gay/straight alliance) . Not only would you be helping yourself,but you'd be helping others who are potentially in the same situation as you. There's a fair bit on the interwebs about how to go about creating a solid GSA and it's benefits. I donno,just something to mull over.
Best of luck
All I can say,is do YOU. Maybe talk to your school about creating a GSA (gay/straight alliance) . Not only would you be helping yourself,but you'd be helping others who are potentially in the same situation as you. There's a fair bit on the interwebs about how to go about creating a solid GSA and it's benefits. I donno,just something to mull over.
Best of luck
Another radicool thing if you have any of them around you is LGBT youth clubs, you can generally meat some cool people there and at the least make some new friends. One thing I don't recommend is LGBT Facebook groups if you turn down that road, there's a surprising amount of people who are not who they say they are on there (heads up).
I understand how it feels though, but having had a look about most people are total carrots so at the end of the day the best thing (IMO) is to be OK with yourself and to have the knowledge that the most fantabulous person will find their way to you if you keep being yourself.
I understand how it feels though, but having had a look about most people are total carrots so at the end of the day the best thing (IMO) is to be OK with yourself and to have the knowledge that the most fantabulous person will find their way to you if you keep being yourself.
Tip do not look in the US competitive TCG pokemon community, everyone is straight, ALWAYS. I've been playing the TCG actively for 6-7 years and have only heard of 4 other LGBT pokemon players second hand, and the only one I saw IRL was 7 years older than me. Seriously if you play the VGC competitively it might be different, but otherwise DO NOT LOOK in the competitive pokemon area for LGBT people, they are basically like booster boxes being thrown to whoever says "me" first, THEY ARE NEARLY IMPOSSIBLE TO FIND, at least in the US, idk how it is in the UK.
Funny you should say that, because the VG competitive community actually has a lot of gays. It seems like a quarter to a third of the senior staff on Smogon are gay, and there's probably a similar amount here for the VG community in general, which is admittedly very small
.We do, however, have more than 4 LGBT+ TCG players on this site alone that I know about, and I don't play the TCG. I don't think you've been looking in the right place. :L
Last edited:
It MUST be the TCG community, because the first instance I even heard of there being LGBT players was the one regionals I went to years ago, and my parents said that there were two guys holding hands. Player beware the north eastern pokemon TCG community is straight land.Funny you should say that, because the VG competitive community actually has a lot of gays. It seems like a quarter to a third of the senior staff on Smogon are gay, and there's probably a similar amount here (though our VG competitive community is very small)
We do, however, have more than 4 LGBT+ TCG players on this site alone that I know about, and I don't play the TCG. I don't think you've been looking in the right place. :L
Sweeping generalizations get you nowhere. Also, not confirmed gay =/= straight, because you're not accounting for the amount of LGBT+ players who aren't out yet/don't tell anyone. For instance, I haven't told anyone I know in real life that attends events that I'm bi so does that make me straight?
Soo many generalisations that there's only gay/straight, I agree. People generally assume I'm gay as I prefer guys romantically but really I'm asexual and there's a whopping difference in there. I must admit I'm one to automatically assume people are straight generally (as a rule they seem to be in general public?) but in a minority like TCGs I wouldn't assume there's a low LGBT percentage personally as it seems otherwise from my experience (I've seen one or two transgender folk in my local shop/s and some of my LGBT friends hang in them sometimes).
And that's the thing, it honestly all boils down to assumptions. People are already usually making assumptions of a person by simply looking at them. You don't know if their straight, gay, bisexual, asexual, pansexual, or even trans sometimes. I know quite a few people that are gay and play the TCG quite frequently. In truth, most people would never know someone is gay until they get to know them. This whole thing about people saying that they've never seen or talked to a someone that's either gay or transsexual is most likely not true. Most people have talked or seen someone that has and will never know it because they are just average people just like you and me.
I know this a bit late too but, just this is for anyone, not just for him. Just be honest and you know don't rush things with anyone. Honesty and someone's friendship should always come first. If a relationship comes to because of it then so be it. But if not, then nothing is loss because you'll still have them as a friend.
First of all, congrats on coming out. It take courage.
Secondly, don't feel the need to rush, but don't be afraid of saying yes either. Just make sure it feels right. I think the number one thing people get wrong about relationships is they expect it all to work out perfect the first time. It can, but remember that it is hard to see certain things without experience, and you or the other person will likely change with time. Be honest, open, and go with your feelings and see where it takes you. Just know you aren't alone, not everyone is as open about what they like or who they love. If you ever want to talk more, feel free to inbox. Best of luck!
Secondly, don't feel the need to rush, but don't be afraid of saying yes either. Just make sure it feels right. I think the number one thing people get wrong about relationships is they expect it all to work out perfect the first time. It can, but remember that it is hard to see certain things without experience, and you or the other person will likely change with time. Be honest, open, and go with your feelings and see where it takes you. Just know you aren't alone, not everyone is as open about what they like or who they love. If you ever want to talk more, feel free to inbox. Best of luck!