Writing The Prophecy of Zetroh

~Magma King~

~Magma King~

Nettle Carrier
Member
Hello all. Just a quick note, I won't be quiting on my other story, but I'll be doing both as the two are very different storys in very different writing styles.
Anyhow, this is my latest one. This will be partially based off my Fan-Game.

Prologue
"When The ultimate darkness and Ultimate light are seperated,
The world shall remain in order.
If the two shall be combined however.
Only the Ultimate chaos shall reign.
When evil combines the power of two,
The world will pay a terrible price."...

Standing alone in the silent moonlight, Angrail looked up into the sky. The rain was streaming down his face, he had been there for hours, but he did not care about any of this. Angrail gazed sharply into the sky. There was nothing in sight. He adjusted his bow tie. He glared one last time, this time fixated on a certain spot. But there was nothing. Wiping the rain from his forehead, he started to trudge slowly home.
"Angrail sir! Wait!" It was another man, wearing a notable Deep crimson cape, black suit, visor, and shining blue hair.
"Scarlet, how good of you to join me", Said Angrail. He waited a moment, then continued. "You do have something to say?"
"Yes sir. The fusion system is ready, all equipment are online and in best condition". Angrail grinned. "Excellent!! I admire your works Scarlet"
"Thank you sir!" Said Scarlet running off into the deep black mist. Angrail slowly followed. The night sky hovered Magnificently over the area. Night fell quiet again.
 
Nice, ~Magma king~! Your style of writing is very good, I like your word choice. There are a few punctuation issues, but grammer is fine. However, many people won't understand anything because they don't know about Flint.
 
Thanks Asuran! This is a new style and I did type quiet quickly, I'll try and fix them.


Chapter 1
The following day, a young boy named Will Harrend had been trecking across the region of Zetroh. Of course, a days treck was relatively normal for him, as an aspiring pokemon master. Will had many friends before he left to go on his journey, but had fortunately learned to cope on himself. He would talk to his pokemon: A feirce grass pokemon called Terraptor(His starting pokemon), an electric type bunny called Bunnite, a fire type bird like pokemon known as Flaruption, Ninja-like beatle pokemon called Shogutle, Vespiquen and a huge purple blob, Swalot. Will had travelled far and wide, searching for many pokemon at a time. He'd never had a certain destination and had always just gone where he felt like. This time was different however. Because of a rumoured legendary pokemon, Will was heading to Dustair city, filled with thugs and dirt. Will was tired. He wiped his forehead and Kept on walking through the desert sands. But then he stopped. He gasped. His eyes filled with tears of joy. Obviously to a normal person this would be normal, but to him, the signpost ment alot: "You are now entering Dustair city"
Will crept through the city. It was bustling with people, but seemed silent in the raging sandstorm. He sharply dashed across the city until finding a cave. "This, is why I am here", He said, smiling at the time. Creeping down the ladder, he silently tiptoed towards a small gem in the middle of a circle of stone pillars. His small hand reached out to touch the gem. As he was about to touch it, another hand quickly slammed down onto it too! "Sorry child, this is mine!" The hand was from a tall man, wearing a brown ruxedo and Flares, a Bowtie, and Black boots. He had sharp brown eyes and long Black hair. "I am Angrail and I demand the Gem!"
"You can't just claim it as if it is yours!" Shouted Will, his eyes burning with fury.
"OK then", Said Angrail, his calmness starting to annoy Will, "We shall have a battle! 4v4! I'll start!", Said Angrail throwing his Pokeball into the air. Out of the pokeball exploded a Magnificent, robed Purple pokemon with an ant like head. It hovered over the battlefield. "OK then, I choose Bunnite!" His cute white electric rabbit was released. "Use Volt tackle!"Shouted Will. Bunnite dashed as fast as it could towards Geisen. "Geisen! Hover beam!"Commanded Angrail. Just as Bunnite was about to jump, Geisen fired a pink lazer at Bunnite. It lifted Bunnite up. Bunnite stammered, alarmed at the height, span it in the air, until it plunged to the ground sprawled on the floor. "Now use Sky attack!" Geisen hovered over Bunnite, then flew up, through the roof of the cave. Will commanded a Thunderbolt, and, with all its Might, Bunnite summoned a huge bolt of electricity, crashing down on Geisen. " Volt tackle again!" Bunnite charged for a second time, but with similar consequences. Will pondered. "Volt tackle!"
"Hover beam!"
"Stop and use Thunderbolt!" Bunnite sped to a hault, then got ready to use Thunderbolt. This was a Tight situation for Angrail. "Mirror coat!"He finally called, and as the lightning hit Geisen, it reflected back onto bunnite. "Now, psychic!" Geisen used a full powered Mental blast on Bunnite, sending it crashing through the cave wall. "Agh! Bunnite!", Said Will. Quickly he regained his determination, and recalled Bunnite to use a second pokemon. "Flaruption!" He called, releasing a large red and orange bird pokemon with a large flame on its head and wings. "Agility, then flare blitz!" Flaruption circled Geisen, confusing it, until finally ramming into it with all of its power. "Now lift it up and use sky dive!" Flaruption grabbed Geisen, flew out of the hole in the cave, then came crashing back down knocking out Geisen. Angrail recalled his Pokemon. Out of his next pokeball burst out Hippowdon, a huge ground type hippo. "Use another flare blitz-
"Crunch!" Called Angrail, and as Flaruption charged into Hippowdon, it crunched its huge jaws down on it. "Now, use roar!" And Hippowdon let loose a huge booming roar, forcing Will to switch out. "Terraptor, its you!" Cried Will, "Now use Night slash!" The grass type dinosaur quickly slashed Hippowdon multiple times.
"Earthquake Hippowdon!" Hippowdon jumped into the air, then body slammed making a huge quake.
"Don't lose your footing Terraptor, use Ingrain!" Will seemed desperate, but fortunately it worked. The roots prevented Terraptor from falling. "Now use Frenzy plant!" Terraptor looked into Hippowdons Terrifying eyes, then commanded a huge thorny plant to attack Hippowdon. With one last ferocious roar, Hippowdon sprawled out onto the floor. Afterwards however, Terraptor stumbled, and fell to regain its stamina."I must say, you are impressing me", Said Angrail, "But not enough. Shadire!" His next pokemon was a ghost-like pokemon with haunting red eyes and feindish trailing arms and no legs. "Shadow ball!-
"Night slash!" Terraptor cut through the first Shadow ball and progressed to Shadire. However, Shadire fired rapidly until the bullets were too much for Terraptor. Stumbling weakly, Terraptor fell. "Terraptor!" Will gasped, "Swalot, show it how we play!"
"That? I highly doubt its potential. Shadow ball!" There were more rapid shots.
"Swallow!"Swalot swallowed up all the Shadow balls.
"But, thats-
"Now spit out!" Swalot fired a large shadow ball, with such force that Shadire was instantly KO'd.
"Urgh!" Said Angrail, realising his position, "Stormaster, finish the pest!" Angrail Released a large pokemon with a thundercloud on its head, and 4 wings no arms and no legs. It was Stormaster! "Use thunder disc!" Stormaster span round quickly, then tackled Swalot whilst hitting it with sparks. "Swalot, explosion!" Swalot began to swell up. Alarmed, Stormaster retreated to the other wall. Unfortunately it was a little late and Stormaster was partly caught in the explosion. Stormaster bashed against the wall, its thundercloud manically flying around. It quickly regrouped, and it opened its eyes again. "Flaruption, your my last hope!" Flaruption returned to the battlefield. Both trainers thought. Both were determined to win.
"Charge beam!"
"Flare blitz!" Stormaster grinned and fired a huge beam of electricity. Using the sheild of fire around it, Flaruption avoided it, but soon enough, it ran out. Flaruption grew slower and more fatigued. Stormaster triumphantly looked down at Flaruption. "You can still do it! Sky dive!", Flaruption's eyes grew red. It shot up, grabbed Stormaster, and started to go back down. "Teleport!" Shouted Angrail. With an annoying grin, Stormaster teleported away. Will Gasped, as Flaruption shot into the ground. Will ran over to cater for Flaruption. "And now!" Said Angrail, "I take my prize! The gem for Tyranoar!" He held the gem in his hand. "I am impressed Will. But not enough so that you claimed victory", Angrail dissappeared into the cave. Will tried to catch his breath. Gasping for air, Will returned Flaruption and pursued the man....
 
ah.... It's been a long time since I last visited, huh?
So, NOW you've amazed me. the only reason i'd log in was to post here... and edit my profile and stuff....
 
Don't worry guyz, it's back XD:

Chapter 2

Rushing through the murky hallways of a similarly murky cavern wasn’t a thing Angrail didn’t do much. Slipping through the shadows of the cave, Angrail slipped through the final door to his destination. However, what he saw quickly changed his sly and stealthy figure into a shocked, angered and slightly confused man. “Legend enterprises?!” He shouted, wishing he hadn‘t shortly after. It didn’t matter; Everybody was already looking at him. “Haha, still searching? I, Angrail, already have what you may be seeking”, Laughed Angrail, shining the gem before the miserable company’s very eyes.
Legend enterprises were failures anyway. Infamous for attempting legendary captures and failing uselessly, it was even worse when discovered that one man had bested the lot. And this, this, was how Angrail got his plan. Angrail had a way with words. He was very persuasive and cunning with his speech, and planned most of his phrases before speaking aloud. “Legend enterprises, clearly you haven’t had a success since… well, since ever?”
They sadly nodded.
“Legend enterprises, have you ever made any progress since you began your quest?”
More sad nods.
“Legend enterprises, have you ever WANTED to do something of significance?”
Now, there were excited nods.
“Have you ever wanted to capture the power of the most powerful, ancient pokemon to exist?!”
Now, there were cheers and chants, roars and screams of selfish and power hungry personalities.
“Then Join me! With I as your leader, we shall conquer the world for our own!”
“But Angrail sir, we cannot do this with our current shameful reputation!”
“We will not. As I finish, we rule under the name, of Team Nightmare!” He roared, as the whole cloud exploded in an outburst of chanting, cheering and applause. “I shall direct you to our base of operations soon enough. But for now-
“STOP!!” Will charged into the room in a frenzy of anger and confusion.
“Pest! Team, leave to your building. I shall join you shortly”, Said Angrail, withdrawing the gem he had previously acquired.
“Have fun playing face to face with a monster William!” Shouted Angrail, with an evil chuckle in his speech. As he tossed the gem onto the floor, he fled to join the rest of his newly gained crew.
The gem began to shake. Will began to shake. Rising from the ground, was not only a terror, but one of Will’s once in a lifetime chances…
 
Too short, seperate paragraphs. Your word choice is okay, but sometimes a little juvenile and repetitive. I like some of your writing techniques. The story is okay, but I would have has Angrail's thoughts explaned in the first paragraph.
 
His thoughts are revealed later along the plotline. And yeah, the chapter was very very short, but it's just to get Team Nightmare cleared really. Still, expect a new one soon, with more action and stuff.
And I tried seperate paragraphs, but it was CPd from word.
 
Chapter 3

The ground shook violently, the walls collapsed into heaps of rubble, and the roof started crumbling away. In the midst of this frenzy of quakes and rock fall, was Will, scared and panicky. And still rising, was a long tail, with a spiked ball on it’s tip, and a shell, spiked as well. Finally, a figure arose: an enormous, dinosaur like ground pokemon recognised by Will as Tyranoar, a legendary pokemon of the region. Will quickly took his battling position. “Terraptor, come out!” Said Will releasing his pokemon. Tyranoar let loose a booming roar, blowing both Terraptor and Will further down the field. “Leaf blade Terraptor!” Shouted Will. Terraptor attempted a full swipe to it’s face, but Tyranoar was quick to react and blocked the attack with his tail. “CRRRRAAARRR!!” Boomed Tyranoar, using an earthquake knocking Terraptor against the wall behind him. Stunned but not off put, Terraptor managed to get back on it’s feat. “I’ll have to try and avoid direct contact”, Will thought, “Frenzy plant!”.

A familiar large thorny plant attacked Tyranoar, tossing him around the increasingly dangerous battlefield. “Ultra ball, go!” Will shouted, and tossed one of his ultra balls from his bag. However, this had proved too late already; The roof would crash down on him! Panic stricken, as Will was about to take his prize, a wall collapsed over the ultra ball, rendering his attempts useless. Unwillingly, he returned his Terraptor called upon Flaruption to escape. “Urrghh, one day, one day I’ll get one for sure!” He thought, and retreated to the local pokemon centre.

“Agents! This will be your first assignment! Come to the assembling hall quickly: we need a squad of at least 15 for this!” Blared the intercom in Team Nightmares newly acquired headquarters. Immediately grunts rushed in from all sides of the building. “Enough. Now, for a quick sum of this”, Said Angrail, “Ancient legend states that caves leading to two legendary beings of massive power have been detected in”…Angrail stopped. Bluelake city. His place of birth. The city of his great manor and family. Were his whole childhood lay rest at, and were now, he would have to bring overwhelming amounts of chaos to it. And worse, what he needed, belonged to his family friends. Angrail worriedly thought, but being as power hungry as he was, he made his final choice. “Bluelake city. Just take the paper and figure it out from there”, He sobbed miserably, handing them an army like mission plan. “Home”, he thought, as he left the room to return back to his office and sit on a large black chair.

“WHAT WE NOW KNOW OF AS THE “BLUELAKE INVASION” HAS BEEN INCREASINGLY MORE DANGEROUS. A GROUP OF THUGS NAMED TEAM NIGHTMARE HAS TAKEN ONE OF OUR CITIZENS HOSTAGE AND IS TRYING TO TAKE A BOOK CONTAINING SOME SORT OF ANCIENT LEGEND. DETAILS STILL PROVE RARE, BUT WE SHALL REPORT BACK SOON ENOUGH”, Buzzed out the T.V in the pokemon centre. This was obviously Will’s cue.

“I wouldn’t give such a priceless artefact to any common thief like you” Croaked the stubborn old man in a defensive fashion.
“Shut up and hand over the book, it won’t take any longer if you just tell us where the damn thing is!” Shouted a Nightmare grunt, “OR we could do this the harder way… Gastly, hypnosis!” He shouted, sending out a Gastly. The old man made furious attempts to resist, but to no avail. “Now, where is the book?!”
“Somewhere you won’t get your hands on it!” Shouted Will, once again bursting into the scene of danger.
“The hero is always the foolish!” Smirked the grunt, “As I’m quite sure you can’t survive a one on fifteen battle!” At this, many of the other grunts laughed, and released their pokemon, mainly consisting of Zubat, Gastly, and Crunchibi, a water and dark pokemon looking like a cross between a shark and a ray, with three bone patterns across it’s back. “Pick your choice now, buddy, A retreat or a loss?!” Will stared at the roof the floor, and then looked back into the eyes of his enemy. “I suppose the hero really is the foolish, so I’ll take you on!” He shouted, drawing a poke ball from his belt…

The paragraphs will look weird, but wait a while and I'll fix them up.
 
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