H'okay, I ended up picking Fennekin as my starter, and a friend playing with me chose Chespin. Seems like Fennekin is the easy mode starter because there are tons of Bugs for you to nuke early game. Chespin will have a hard time, although it gets Rollout pretty early which helps a lot. It's no Snivy, don't worry.
Final evos look much, much better in full animation. Don't judge the designs until you've seen them. But...
Delphox has the worst cry I have *ever* heard. I am not joking. It's *awful*. It literally sounds like Delphox is trying to *speak* and doing it *terribly*. Nothing will possibly prepare you for it.