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Daren

Proud ownr of 300 Chimchars and counting
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This is a story about the Sinnoh Battle Frontier and the Frontier Brains. While Pokemon leaves them as jsut emotionless pixel characters, I hpe to add a bit of depth and background that Pokemon never gave some of these characters the chance to have. That being said, I present to you, the Pulse of the Frontier:

Chapter One: Dahlia: Roulette Goddess
Chapter Two: Darach: Castle Valet
Chapter Three: Argenta: Hall Matron
Chapter Four: Mars: Galactic Commander


Chapter One: Dahlia: Roulette Goddess
It was all up to the roll of the dice now. This was nothing new to her. She had based her life, her career, her Frontier Facility, on luck; on chance. Her life had been what she liked to call, the chance of a lifetime. But Dahlia’s favorite part about chances, or luck as some called it, was that it wouldn’t work on its own, for it to work, you have to take it. So as the die flew from her palm into the whirlpool shaped mechanism and down the winding tube, Dahlia followed them with her mind.

Even when the die had disappeared into a cube container at the base of the machine, Dahlia watched them, taking her chance. A large screen flashed to life and displayed two die, one blue and one yellow. A mechanized voice then came from the speakers.

“Chance has taken its toll. Dahlia’s first Pokemon shall be Dusknoir followed by Blaziken and then Togekiss. The challenger shall begin with Absol followed by Scizor and Gliscor. The battle style will be 1 vs. 1 and the best two out of three wins.”

Dahlia smirked. She had the advantage of type in rounds two and three. The challenger, a black haired boy about the age of fifteen groaned and mumbled something about having terrible luck. Don’t blame the die sweetie, She thought to herself, Chance is so much more than that.

The two battlers stepped out onto the playing wheel. Since Dahlia based her Battle Facility on a roulette casino, the playing field was shaped somewhat like the inside of a pinball machine. The other Frontier Brains called it strange and inappropriate, but she loved it. Dahlia chose the Poke-Ball with the letter ‘D’ engraved on it and after giving it a quick kiss, she threw it into the middle of the arena. In a burst of light, an ominous, ghastly creature appeared in the middle of the field. “Let’s show them what we’re made of Absol!” Shouted the challenger as he unleashed from his ball, a doglike Pokemon with a crescent shaped object around its neck. The creature screamed its battle cry and then put itself into a defensive stance.

Poor kid, Thought Dahlia, Has no idea who he’s dealing with. Then aloud she said, “The first move belongs to the challenger, and that’s you. Remember, let chance take its toll and victory is never far away!”

“Ya, whatever,” The boy scoffed, “Let’s hit em’ hard Absol, use Double Team and then follow it up with Dark Pulse!”

The being of Absol was suddenly multiplied and Dusknoir was instantly surrounded by many proxy Absols. Then, coming from all of them at once, a black wave swept over the reaper Pokemon and threw it to the floor. The boy sneered. Dahlia looked over the scene with a frown. In her mind, she calculated her chances, one real Pokemon and Nine phonies. So that’s a One out of Ten chance. Well, the odds have never been pretty before and that hasn’t stopped me. “Well,” She said with a laugh, “There’s no chance if one isn’t taken! Dusknoir; attack the one directly behind you with a Will-O-the-Wisp!”

Obediently, Dusknoir fired the tiny blue flaming particles at the Pokemon behind it. But the attack simply sailed through the illusion Pokemon. Another Dark Pulse attack came from the army of Absols. Once again, Dusknoir was struck and knocked to the floor, fighting for consciousness.

“How’s that whole chance thing working out for ya’?” The boy taunted, “Why don’t you just concede this round Dahlia? It’s obvious that you can’t beat us!”

“I wouldn’t dream of giving up,” She replied with a smirk, “I’m going to take my chances with Will-O-the-Wisp once more! And this time, aim for the one beside you!”

Summoning all of its strength, the Reaper Pokemon sent the flames flying once more toward one of the Absols. This time, it hit dead on and a live flame danced around Absols mane. The dark Pokemon shrieked in horror and threw itself roughly to the earth, extinguishing the flames. The challenger stood speechless before asking, “How on earth did you know which one was the real Absol?”

“If I had known sweetie, I would have hit it the first time,” She replied, “Let’s just call it a lucky guess. Now Dusknoir, let’s finish this battle with Shadow Ball!”

“Not so fast!” The boy snapped his face hot with anger, “Absol! Use Haze and it will miss you for sure!” At the same moment as the crackling ball of dark energy was released from Dusknoir’s body, the room was filled with a deep mist that blocked all sight. Even Absol’s silhouette was almost invisible in the midst of the haze. The ball streaked through the darkness, missing the target by a matter of yards. The boy let out a harsh chuckle. “I guess when it comes to aiming, two eyes are better than one.”

“We’ll see.”

Just then, a loud bopping noise was heard as the Shadow Ball attack collided with the pinball plunger and redirected towards Absol. The attack slammed full force into its target and threw the disaster Pokemon to the floor. When the haze had faded away, Absol was picked up unconscious. The boy blinked in astonished disbelief, “How? Never mind, bad matchup or not, Scizor, its time to show Dahlia that we play for keeps!”

“That’s the spirit! Remember, you don’t stand a chance unless you take one!” Dahlia said him with a wink, “Now it’s time to turn up the heat Blaziken! You know the routine!”

The blaze chicken Pokemon and the steel bug Pokemon circled each other around the arena. Determination burned in their eyes as they moved, each waiting for the other Pokemon to make the first move. Scizor didn’t have to wait long. Instead of charging toward its opponent, Blaziken made a dash for the other side of the stage. It was surrounded by a cloud of flames shaped like a large wheel. It collided with the left plunger and ricocheted back towards Scizor with tremendous speed. The bug Pokemon was faster though and it maneuvered itself out of the path of the oncoming Pokemon.

Blaziken wasn’t deterred. It merely threw itself against the opposite plunger and came back with multiplied speed. Still Scizor dodged, although Blaziken kept returning in its flaming armor even faster than before. As the blaze chicken Pokemon sailed toward Scizor for the seventh time, the targeted Pokemon held out an iron claw and caught Blaziken’s feather leg in a vice. Blaziken was thrown to the floor of the arena and was knocked out. Scizor’s trainer beamed with pride. “Fantastic job Scizor!” He said, returning the red Pokemon to its Poke-Ball, “What do you say Dahlia? Want to just hand me my Battle Pin and spare your final Pokemon the pain?”

“I said I wasn’t going to give up and I meant it!” She replied, a twinge of anger sprouting in her chest, “Togekiss and I will take our chances with you! Togekiss go! Let’s finish up our little game!”

“Go Gliscor! Bite its wing!” The challenger commanded to his Pokemon, “Show no mercy and don’t take any chances!”

The bat Pokemon made a dive for Togekiss but the jubilee Pokemon quickly evaded the attack and headed toward the floor of the pinball arena. Electricity engulfed Gliscor’s saber-sharp fangs as it zoomed through the air in hot pursuit. The two Pokemon wound aimlessly through the area, twisting and turning around the mesh of obstacles. Once, Gliscor collided head on with a plunger when Togekiss banked around a tight corner and it was thrown some distance away. “This is your chance Togekiss! Use Future Sight now!” Dahlia cried, “Then follow it up with Metronome!”

Togekiss’ eyes turned a bright shade of pink as it focused its thoughts and looked for a brief moment into the future. Then, as soon as it had come, the pinkish color vanished from its eyes and all returned to normal. The challenger scoffed, “Way to waste an attack! Gliscor, use thunder fang on that pest and win us our Battle Pin!”

Togekiss wiggled around in the air using its metronome attack, summoning a move at random. What resulted was a roost attack, healing it completely. Dahlia winced at the unhelpful attack, as Togekiss was already at its full health. Gliscor’s fangs dug into Togekiss’ fair hide and electricity suddenly coursed through the poor Pokemon’s body. Dahlia’s brow furrowed, “Don’t give in Togekiss! Use Metronome again!”

Togekiss summoned once again, an attack from random. Instantly, Gliscor was blasted head-on by a Water Spout attack. The jet of water sent Gliscor flying into the ceiling above, only to loop around and return to its ominous hovering position above Togekiss. “You think that you can taunt us with your puddles, Dahlia?” Sneered the challenger, “Finish it off with your Guillotine!”

Calling forth all of its strength, the bat Pokemon charged toward Togekiss, its claw gaping open as if it were itself a guillotine ready to chop its target in two. Dahlia tried to shut out what she knew was about to happen and Togekiss braced for impact. But it never came. A beam of light generated by Togekiss from the past struck Gliscor on the wing and sent it hurtling down, careening into the floor below. The crash that resulted shook the arena and Gliscor was returned to its Poke-ball unconscious.

The challenging trainer shook his head and then looked into Dahlia’s golden-yellow eyes with a sad smile. He brushed a lock of dark hair from in front of his eyes and crossed the arena to stand before her.

“You taught me something today Dahlia, and I will never forget it, I’ve gained something today worth much much more than a Battle Pin, thank you,” he said, “I hope to battle you again soon, and by that time, I hope to have become much stronger and perhaps…if I’m lucky…The result of our affair might be different.”

And with that, he turned on his heel and left the Facility. As the metal door slammed shut behind him, Dahlia placed a hand over her heart. She strolled down into the arena and after giving it a soft kiss, she returned Togekiss to its Poke-Ball. I’ve learned something too, She said to herself.

But her thoughts were interrupted by a knock on the door. Startled, Dahlia hurried up out of the arena and down the hallway to the far door. In the minute it took her to cross the large room, the caller rung the bell at the very least six more times. When she pulled open the metal door, a stocky man with a green jacket and blonde hair pushed his way inside. Dahlia recognized him immediately as her fellow Frontier Brain, Palmer. But the way he closed the door so quickly behind him, and the way he panted, as if he had been running very fast, which was not his style, unnerved her that something was unnatural about his calling. She was about to ask him what was wrong but he cut her off.

“There’s no time to explain!” He exclaimed, taking her by the hand, “We have to get to the Battle castle if there is to be any hope left for this world! Something terrible has happened! I’ll explain everything to you on the way, but for now you must hurry!”
 
RE: Pulse of the Frontier - The Story (Please critique, needs work!)

6/10 not exactly top-notch.
Evil grin. Thank me for criticizing your art work.


Behold, I have not idea what I was talking about. Good work, spelling, punctuation (believe me, I could go on forever). Nice effort overall.
 
RE: Pulse of the Frontier - The Story (Please critique, needs work!)

very good storyline, you can picture what's going to happen next :p
 
RE: Pulse of the Frontier - The Story (Please critique, needs work!)

Thanks you guys, the next chapter should be up either today or tommorow, it will also star one of the remaining four Frontier Brains, who it will be is up to you to try and guess :)
 
RE: Pulse of the Frontier - The Story (Please critique, needs work!)

Here's Chapter 2, I kind of rushed it so if there are any problems please alert me. I would like to make my story as grammatically correct as possible.

Chapter Two: Darach: Castle Valet

Perfect. Just the way he liked it. A place for everything and everything in its place; that was Darach. The Castle valet brushed a strand of jet-black hair out of his eye and strolled merrily down the enormous corridor that was the left wing of the Battle Castle. A loud ‘caw’ sound echoed through the room and a large hawk-like Pokmon swept through the air only to land gracefully atop the man’s shoulder.

“Why hello Staraptor,” He greeted his bird, stroking its neck, “Did you have a nice flight this morning, perhaps you are ready to work on mastering your Brave Bird attack eh?”

Staraptor nodded its head and left its perch on his shoulder, soaring down the hall and through the open door at the end of the hallway. It collided directly with a young girl turning the corner and the two fell to the marble floor in a heap. Horrified by the mess of feathers, girl, and bird, Darach hurried over and helped the young lady to her feet. Locks of magnificent blonde hair fell down to the end of the girl’s mini-dress and were almost caught beneath her high-heels as she hobbled up and retained her stately posture.

“Dear me,” Darach apologized, fumbling madly for words as he bent over to pick up a feather that had fallen upon the otherwise spotless floor in the collision, “I…I…I’m dreadfully sorry…Staraptor…would you be so kind as to watch where you’re going?”

The girl giggled sweetly. “It wasn’t the poor Pokemon’s fault,” She replied, wrapping her arms around the slightly disturbed Pokemon’s neck, “The sweet thing couldn’t help it when I stepped so rudely into its path, Darach.”

“But Lady Caitlyn, I do insist that you accept my humblest apologies on account of Staraptor’s recklessness and…what’s this?” Darach said, extending the girl’s arm to reveal a small red bruise, “Your ladyship, you have acquired a scar, oh dear, I will fetch the castle Nurse immediately!”

“Darach, please!” Caitlyn cried, pulling free of his tender grasp, “I’m not a child anymore, please stop treating me like I’m too frail and weak to fend for myself just because I can’t battle!”

“But, your ladyship, you’re the princess of this castle, I was appointed by your mother and employed by yourself to watch over you,” Darach replied, pushing his glasses higher up onto his nose, “I care only about your personal safety, I just couldn’t stand the thought of your fair beauty and health being compromised because I wasn’t on my guard!”

Caitlyn took the older man’s hand in her smaller one. Darach took a deep breath and sighed it out. His eyes stuck to Caitlyn’s beautiful blue ones and he found no hope for escape from their beckoning call. Small tears formed in his eyes and he embraced the girl fondly. It seemed to Darach like his life had held no meaning before Caitlyn, the princess of the battle tower had stumbled into it. Her ailing parents knew that when they passed away, that Caitlyn would be left as the sole heir to govern the castle as she wished.

However, the girl had one flaw. Every ruler, be it king or prince, or princess or queen of the Battle Castle shared a similar skill. This skill was that of the Pokemon trainer. Each member of the legendary family had demonstrated exceptional skill in the arts of Pokemon battling and rightly so, for a ruler could not keep his or her position unless he or she accepted all challenges and ended up victorious.

Unfortunately, it seemed that Caitlyn had missed this gene altogether. She could not win a Pokemon Battle for the life of her and her only Pokemon was an Ambipom. As a result of a lack of training, Ambipom forgot it’s move-set entirely and became more of a pet than a partner.

So when the day arrived when Caitlyn’s aged parents passed away and the crown was given to her, that her position was challenged. Horrified, the girl could do nothing but accept. Sensing her predicament, Darach, the girl’s butler, came to her rescue and battled and defeated her challenger so soundly that no more challenges were made. From that point on, all challengers were dealt with by Darach and his trusty Staraptor.

“Thank you Darach,” the words that Caitlyn had spoken five years ago still rung in his head, “I hope that you will stay here with me forever.”

Suddenly, all emotions were forgotten by a loud rap at the door. Darach was irritated by this untimely interruption; regardless, he hurried to open the door. Staraptor, who had recovered by this time, and Caitlyn followed him curiously. As Darach opened the door, he was about to say that there would be no challenges until the following day, but the entrance of Palmer and Dahlia made him forget this.

“Why Palmer, Dahlia, what ever are you doing here?” Darach inquired, giving them a quizzical look.

“I only wish that I knew,” Dahlia replied, glaring at Palmer.

“I will explain, but I believe it would be best if we talked privately,” Palmer said, motioning with his head toward Caitlyn. Reluctantly, Darach excused the girl from the room and then took his place on an armchair and offered places on a large sofa to Palmer and Dahlia. “As you both should well remember, twenty years ago, Scott Harris founded this wonderful place which he called the Battle Frontier. There were five of us; Siiarra, the mother of our Caitlyn, you Dahlia, Argenta, Thorton, and I. The program seemed to be working well and so five years later, Scott also founded the Kanto and Hoenn Battle Frontiers. The former worked marvelously and many skilled trainers found their skills tested by the power of the Frontier Brains. The latter, however, proved catastrophic. The Frontier Brains, fueled by their lust for this newfound power, rebelled against Scott’s authority. Doing so, they almost succeeded in undoing the fabric of our space-time by bringing Deoxys to earth by way of an intergalactic rover. However, their plan failed when their leader, Valrem was supposedly killed by Deoxys and his body was taken into space. After this, Scott nearly scrapped the program in an attempt to prevent any further problems. In the end, it was the combined efforts of me and Brandon, the brain behind the Battle Pyramid from the Kanto Battle Frontier that made Scott change his mind.”

“Don’t you think we already know all of that?” Darach snapped, “I’ve been trying to forget that day for many years and although I was never really an official member of the Battle Frontier, I played a part in that affair as well. But might I ask what you have brought that up for now, fifteen years later?”

“I was getting to that,” Palmer replied, annoyed at having been interrupted so rudely, “I have acquired intelligence through my son, Jun, that a meteorite crashed to earth late last night that appeared to be the same one that brought Deoxys here the first time. Previously, we did all that we could to keep the affair quiet but with my son’s big mouth the public will find out about it soon enough. If Deoxys truly has returned to our planet, it could mean more than the destruction of the Battle Frontier, but the work of tearing apart the fabric of space-time that this Pokemon began so many years ago may be completed, and if that happens, all hope is lost.”
 
RE: Pulse of the Frontier - The Story (Please critique, needs work!)

Chapter Three: Argenta: Hall Matron
The fierce winds whipped her magenta hair in front of her face and the snow fell down in flurries upon her head. Lightning streaked across the dark sky and she was sufficiently drenched from the torrents of rain; perfect weather for flying. Agenta climbed into the cockpit of her mini-jet fastening the over-sized seatbelt loosely around her waist. Beside her, Drifblim floated, fighting off nature’s onslaught.

“Maybe you should stay at the hall this time,” Argenta suggested, “You’re a balloon, these are the farthest things from your ideal flying conditions.”

The Pokemon that floated beside her was shaped very similarly to a hot-air-balloon, it had an ‘X’ in the center of it’s body to represent where it had been scarred once by lightning in a similar flight. However, despite Argenta’s soothing words, Drifblim was unmoved. Even through the harsh gale, it floated in perfect sync with it’s owner’s craft. Argenta chuckled.

“You know this is why you are my favorite,” She said with a smile. She pulled a pair of goggles that sat atop her head over her eyes and started the engine. Within a moment, the jet churned to life and she began slowly to rise through the air. The combined sound of the thunder, the wind, and the roar of Argenta’s engine was deafening. The craft had no doors, this was mostly so that Drifblim and her other flying Pokemon could accompany her in her plane if they were too tired to fly themselves.

The cold wind nipped at her cheeks as she fought with the controls to keep the craft in the air through the tremendous power of the storm. A flash of lightning nearby caused her in a sudden moment of panic to bank steeply to the left. This gave the wind a position for resistance and it tossed the jet about as if it were a beach ball. Argenta struggled to keep herself from being thrown from the craft.

Another bolt of lightning illuminated the sky. For a split second, Argenta thought she saw a strangely familiar object hurtling toward the earth. It looked like a meteorite; but then it couldn’t have been. This sudden distraction from her navigation of the craft resulted in a loss of control and the jet was sent plummeting toward the earth below. Argenta pulled with all of her might on the controls, praying that it would only bank upward and avoid what was sure to otherwise mean destruction.

She didn’t feel the collision. Instants before the plane crashed into a burning heap on the ground far below, she sifted into unconsciousness and blacked out. When she next opened her eyes, her first assumption was that she had died and was now in some sort of waiting room for the afterlife. Nothing that she saw seemed material, all was obscure, faded images, memories that she had forgotten; faceless people that she had met in the Poke-mart or who had challenged her in the Battle Hall. It was like a dream. But the next thing she saw made it seem more like a nightmare. A man, not obscure like the others, but clear like water, was moving toward her. He was familiar, far too familiar. He had betrayed her and she hated him. Yet his smile was so charming, so sweet, so deceptive, so vile. Valrem would not make a fool of her again.

He moved closer and now they were practically nose to nose. Argenta tried to scream, she tried to run but she couldn’t. She could only stand there and be absorbed by him. Slowly, his face grew distorted and warped and it began to change shape. The result horrified her. The face was extraterrestrial. She found herself staring into the empty eyes of Deoxys. For years she had tried to forget. But now something forced her to remember everything. Somehow she knew. It was far from over. It was beginning again. All of the grief, the pain, the betrayal, the heart-break; it was happening again.

“No, I won’t let you deceive me again!” She cried, tears rolling down her cheeks like a river, “I will not be your puppet! You did to me what you let Deoxys do to you! My friends may be naïve enough to think you’re dead but I know what happened to you Valrem! Why did you let Deoxys do it to you?”

Through the tears that clogged her eyes, she watched the world around her fade away. The being before her was the last to disappear, but then even Deoxys vanished into the endless darkness. Then she was falling; falling through the blackness with nothing beneath her. Then she stopped. She landed with a thud upon some invisible substance. It appeared that there was no material in any direction and only an endless abyss of space. She wasn’t quite sure what happened next but she must have blacked out again because when she opened her eyes, she was in a large basket being carried about by Drifblim. The balloon Pokemon squealed in delight when it noticed its master’s awakening.

Argenta sat up wearily. She realized that she must have gone unconscious due to high amounts of pressure. Drifblim had obviously rescued her from the fate which her jet had met with. But these things were far from the hot topics in her mind. Had she really seen what she thought she saw? It seemed to be an illusion but the chill that went down her spine at the reoccurring face in her brain felt all too real. It took a moment for her to realize that she was no longer in the air at all; but rather, in her living room, being flown around in small circles by Drifblim as some sort of soothing remedy.

“Argenta? Are you alright?”

Argenta was startled to hear Thorton’s voice as he stepped into the room from the adjoining kitchen. In his hand he held an ice packet and a glass of water. Thorton and Argenta had known each other longer than any of the other Frontier Brains and they had also been two of the first of Scott’s acquaintances. Thorton helped Drifblim to lay her down on the couch and then put the ice packet to her forehead.

“You’re lucky you woke up when you did,” He said, “I was just about to pour this glass of water over your face. I knew that if you didn’t wake up after that, you were either playing a prank or you were dead.”

“I would like to think that we had known each-other long enough that you would have out ruled the former, Thorton,” She replied despite the sudden pain that came from speaking. Thorton shrugged.

“I don’t know, judging by your angle of trajectory and the velocity of your fall, the g-forces induced would be enough to kill even a Garchomp,” He said, “But when I looked past the data, which is something I rarely do, I remembered that we were talking about Argenta here and that kinda disrupts any kind of equation.”

Argenta smiled. She would have laughed if her whole body, including her throat, didn’t ache. Therefore, she just smiled. Thorton was a genius. He could take a part a scientific calculator, delete all of its data, reprogram it, and put it back together again with a music-playing application. He could outsmart some of the lead brains in the world. Once he had even taken a survey to see why most Torchics crossed the road. But the best part about Thorton was that when he did as he liked to put it, look past the data, he was one of the best friends anyone could have. Argenta smiled again.

Thorton set down the water glass and sighed. He sat at the far end of the couch and looked down at the floor. Argenta knew he was avoiding eye contact. This was standard procedure. Thorton liked raining on people’s parade even less than most people. Whatever Thorton wasn’t saying was going to hit Argenta in a soft spot. She tried to meet eyes with him, only then would he start talking.

Thorton saw what she was doing and quickly took out his Poke’-tech. It was his own invention. He could spend hours on it, whether he was analyzing data for a new species of Pokemon or playing a virtual game of ping-pong. Argenta and he were the only ones that could really understand the device enough to make it work though, and that was why it hadn’t hit shelves by this time. With Argenta’s help, Thorton was going to try to make it less complicated. He pressed a few buttons and voiced a few commands before handing the device to Argenta. The image on the screen made her heart stand still. She had seen it falling from the sky only a matter of hours ago.

“You saw it didn’t you,” Thorton asked, his eyes locked on her bright red ones, “The dream that you witnessed when you blacked out was nothing natural. Whoever or whatever this thing is was trying to contact you. Whether it was to warn you or to threaten you I don’t know. You have enemies Argenta. We have enemies. You’re not an idiot. I’m am not an idiot. Valrem is alive.”
 
RE: Pulse of the Frontier - Chapter Three is up! (Please critique, needs work!)

Thank you Seth! You just gave me the motivation that I needed to keep working on this thing! :D. Expect Chapter 4 to be up soon!
 
RE: Pulse of the Frontier - Chapter Three is up! (Please critique, needs work!)

Chapter 4: Mars: Galactic Commander
“Why should I trust you?” She sat behind her desk, reclined in a large armchair. Her face was buried in a book, and the pages were soiled from tears; tears that came from the heartbreak of being abandoned. The pain was unbearable. She had been abandoned by her family, by her friends, and then, when she joined Team Galactic, she made the mistake of putting her trust into a leader that she thought would never abandon her. She thought wrong. He was gone. Many of the Grunts beneath her as well as her colleague Jupiter who were ailed by her pain, tried to convince her that Cyrus had only gone away for a while and would be back soon. She wouldn’t fall for another lie.

If Mars had learned one thing in her life, it was this: the answers to loneliness and grief are not friends. They will leave you, and they will take a piece of your heart with them, leaving you more miserable than before. It was the worst feeling to be betrayed by someone you trusted; to realize that they never really loved you like you thought you did. It had been eight years since she had run away from her family in hopes of finding a cure to this horrible disease of loneliness.

As one often does when they run off into the world in search of something, Mars met a man of similar ambition. His name was Cyrus. He introduced to her his dream of creating a new and sinless world without pain, suffering, or heartbreak. Cyrus saw the potential in Mars and quickly offered her a position of authority in the organization he planned on founding. He was the first person to tell Mars he thought she was special. Mars loved him; and she had thought he loved her back.

The tears that wetted the flimsy pages of the book made them tear more easily in her hand. He had told her when he stepped into the portal atop Mt. Coronet that he would come back for her. He promised her. She had made a mark on her wall every time he had made that same promise to her and now the pinkish color was barely visible beneath the thousands of markings. Markings representing thousands of times that the man who said she was special made a promise to her that he had broken.

She ripped out another of the pages and cast it toward the wastebasket beside her desk. Instead, the pages floated, missing their target and falling into a small patch of light on the floor where the moonlight seeped in through the partially closed blinds. Trust had brought her heartbreak countless times before; why on earth should she trust the man that stood behind her?

“Because, you know that I will be the answer to all of your problems.”

“You can’t begin to summarize my problems.”

“Do you doubt me? You are stuck between a rock and a hard place, Mars. You hate to give up on the wonderful relationships that you thought would last forever but you don’t want to be naïve enough to assume that he’s coming back for you. You hate the loneliness but know that by establishing friendships that are sure to end in treachery, you will only dig yourself into a deeper pit.”

Mars dropped her head into her hands and rubbed her red eyes. “So?” She said quietly, turning to face him, “You seem to know me pretty well, I only wish I knew myself like that. So? What is your solution?”

He smiled, flashing a mouthful of gleaming white teeth. “My solution?” He said, taking her hand in his, “Simple; the solution is power. Join me Mars and we will continue where Cyrus left off. We will return this sinful disgusting world to Alpha; to Arceus.”



I know its short but...
 
RE: Pulse of the Frontier - Chapter Three is up! (Please critique, needs work!)

C'mon guys, I know people are ready because of the poll, please tell me what you think of it!
 
RE: Pulse of the Frontier - Chapter Three is up! (Please critique, needs work!)

its really really good! See, I dont have any idea who that Valrem guy is, but if he is a secret bad guy talking to mars, that makes sense. I didnt understand who was talking to her, and you repeated that the man she loved or whatever betrayed her. In any case, I didnt notice any errors, but then again i was just reading it for the fun of it.Also, thats how my story is. I have over 100 views, but only 12 replies, and most are from me...
 
RE: Pulse of the Frontier - Chapter Three is up! (Please critique, needs work!)

It's rather good. The grammar and spelling were good, although there was one sentence, which could have been said better. In chapter 3: Thorton didn’t like raining on people’s parade even less than most people. That says that he doesn't like doing so less than other people. What you meant was: Thorton liked raining on people's parade even less than most people.

Other than that, I didn't really spot any errors, but why did you go with the anime version, and have the Hoenn BF in Kanto?
 
RE: Pulse of the Frontier - Chapter Three is up! (Please critique, needs work!)

Thanks for the tips on the sentence, I'll change that. Also, I don't play the games, I thought that was where it was. :D
 
RE: Pulse of the Frontier - Chapter Three is up! (Please critique, needs work!)

That is great I love it!
the grammar was good too!
 
RE: Pulse of the Frontier - Chapter Three is up! (Please critique, needs work!)

Ok, I'm new here and I've been reading this. To me, it sounds great! ^_^ I'd love to see you continue...very suspenseful. Keep it up!

btw, just curious but how old are the brains in here? It seems that they are of similar age? I could've sworn Thorton doesn't seem to be a day older than 14 in the games...just a curiosity.
 
RE: Pulse of the Frontier - Chapter Three is up! (Please critique, needs work!)

Thanks for all of the critique people, I know its been a while but I've been busy with the writing contest and getting ready for worlds. Also, in answer to your qustion Ava, I would say the Frontier Brains are sort of like:
Dahlia - mid-twenties
Darach - late-forties
Argenta - early-thirties
Thorton - early-twenties
Palmer - mid-thirties

Anyways, here is the fifth chapter:
Chapter 5: Thorton: Factory Head
Thorton climbed up the mountain-sized pile of junk, heaving out busted circuit boards, snapped antennas, and other assorted odds and ends from the pile. He was in heaven. A world made completely of various junked mechanical instruments, each a piece to solving the puzzle that would fit in a different way than the rest. He chuckled, recalling his all-time favorite proverb, “One man’s junk is another man’s treasure, that certainly applies here doesn’t it Electivire?”

The large, furry creature that was Electivire raised its head from behind another mountain of junk and gave Thorton a thumbs-up. Then the Pokemon’s twin tails began to glow and a beeping sound came from the device clamped around its wrist. In excitement, Thorton dropped his armload of knick-knacks and slid down the pile, hurrying over to the place where Electivire was busy excavating a rusted object buried deep.

“Did you find it Electivire?” Thorton cried, aiding his Pokemon with the unearthing of the object. With some difficulty, they succeeded in its uncovering and Thorton instantly set about the business of making sure that it was completely intact. Electivire watched, hopefully awaiting its master’s conclusion. Thorton’s face paled.

“Electivire,” He said, “There is a piece missing, a crucial piece. We have to find it! Completed, this will be the last piece necessary for finishing my machine!” Groping madly around in the jumble, Thorton and his Pokemon continued their search, setting the object in the grasp of Electivire’s tails to prevent its getting lost in the junkyard. Suddenly, the sound of crunching of metal beneath boots that came from behind him made Thorton turn.

“Is this what you were looking for?” Brandon asked, handing him a small panel with a cord dangling from one side. Brandon was head of the Battle Pyramid, a facility from the Kanto Battle Frontier.

“Brandon!” Thorton exclaimed, taking the piece in his hands, “Thank you! It’s exactly what I needed! But what on earth are you doing all the way here in Sinnoh?”

“Well, when your flying pyramid crash lands in the middle of the Sinnoh Battle Frontier what’re you going to do?” Brandon replied with a chuckle, “You see…”

“One of the hover panels on the base of the pyramid stopped working and the misbalance of hover power threw the pyramid out of the sky,” Thorton finished. Observing Brandon’s shocked expression he said, “Hey, I designed it, remember? The only way that ship is going to crash is if one of the hover panels starts bugging.”

“Can you fix it?” Brandon asked, although he already knew the answer. Thorton gave him a look that said ‘you have got to be kidding me’ and then continued his examination of the piece of equipment he had been tinkering with. Then, something about Brandon’s story made him stop what he was doing and address his friend, “Brandon, it is battling season for you, what were you doing flying over Sinnoh?”

Brandon set his jaw in a grim line. Thorton did likewise. It was one of the ways they promised that they would tell whatever information was to follow to no one. Then Brandon pulled from the pack that was slung round his shoulder, a photograph, laminated in a clear protective sealing. He handed it to Thorton.

“As you probably well know, after Cyrus disappeared into the Distorted World in search of a new one, Saturn abandoned the team to start his own gang, and Charon was arrested at Stark Mountain, the remaining pieces of Team Galactic split between Sinnoh and Kanto. This has all by now become big news across all regions, especially those mentioned. Many have dismissed Team Galactic as defeated, but I know better. Ever since the incident on Mount Coronet and the three great lakes of Sinnoh, when the peace and tranquility of the world was put at stake, I have begun watching Team Galactic with a peeled eye. Three days ago, I checked my hidden camera for the twelve photos it took every day. All were just empty pictures of the outside of the Galactic Kanto Head Quarters except for this one.”

Thorton said nothing as he looked over the image. He gulped down what for most would have been words of fear and terror. Thorton didn’t freak out. It was what had made him a Frontier Brain in the first place. He always kept his cool; even in the direst of situations; and this was dire.

“So, Team Galactic had a visitor,” Thorton said, trying to conceal his worry, “A visitor from another planet.” He handed Brandon back the blurry picture of Deoxys standing in the doorway of the Galactic Kanto Head Quarters.
 
RE: Pulse of the Frontier - Chapter Three is up! (Please critique, needs work!)

Great chapter, Daren! ^_^ I wonder who is this Valrem...and what is his connection to Argenta? Did she once love him? Well, great work again! I'm looking forward to your next updates!

Pretty please? I'm jittery from all that suspense, quite strnage coming from an almost-18-year-old, but I am looking forward to it.
 
RE: Pulse of the Frontier - Chapter Five is up! (Please critique, needs work!)

Chapter 6: Palmer: Tower Tycoon
Dahlia, Palmer, Brandon, Darach, Thorton, and Argenta all at around a table that easily could have been situated at by a dozen more. Everywhere anyone of the brains looked, they met with the mirrored reflections of their own grim expressions. All had been silent since Palmer had finished his retelling of the situation at hand.

“You know there is only one option,” Dahlia spoke up, breaking the ice, “We were only just barely able to defeat Deoxys and Valrem last time they came here, it will be even harder now that they are expecting resistance. We certainly can’t do it alone, but revealing any of this information publically could be catastrophic and could get many innocent people hurt. We need to gather our fellow Kanto Frontier Brains, your friends, Brandon.”

The Pyramid King nodded but said nothing. His mouth was set in a dismal line and it appeared that he was sort of toning Dahlia out as he sat thinking. She hadn’t at all meant to make a serious suggestion, as it seemed obvious that no matter how many Frontier Brains worked together, Deoxys’ power could not be matched. Her remark was merely a way to break the wicked spell of silence. It was an awful, hopeless silence; that which occurs when a situation proves so desperate that none care to openly make suggestions that will ultimately prove useless.

The younger of the brains looked expectantly at the elder, hoping to find some trace of hope inside his expression; but there was none, thus, the group just sat there dismally, each contemplating inside their own chances inside their heads. Palmer looked up from the photograph of Deoxys that had been passed around the table and took another look around his comrades. No doubt many of them were considering abandoning the others and hiding in some desolate part of Sinnoh; a futile gamble at a few more hours of life.

He tried to smile, hoping that his expression might re-instill optimism in his friends. The team had spent many years together since the founding of the Frontier. They had been chosen by Scott because he knew that they were the five that would be the most compatible with one another. Only Darach met his gaze, and in the old man’s eyes, Palmer saw a spark of promise.

“Do you have anything Darach?” Palmer inquired expectantly.

“Not much of anything really,” He replied, but it was obvious that from within a cranium, something was sprouting that he was itching to release. The others bade him tell all. “The only element of battle that was strong enough to prove the undoing of Valrem last time was surprise. He had no clue whatsoever that his allies, Deoxys and the Hoenn Brains, would ultimately betray him. We are all aware that Valrem is a master of deceit and no doubt he has tricked the broken remains of Team Galactic, the only ones who are desperate enough to believe him. I also propose that he is probably planning to betray the Galactics, but not if they betray him first.”

The Castle Valet paused for a moment to observe the effect that his words had made on his partners. Four out of five of the faces he met eyes with looked skeptical to say the least and Brandon had already lost interest and was busy contemplating his own scheme. A bit irritated at the exception of his plot, he continued, “I have had affairs with Galactic prior and if I’ve learned anything, many of them, including Commander Saturn, who is now wandering Sinnoh as leader of his own gang, can be bought into anything. Even into turning us into Team Galactic. Or at least, some of us, the others will have to travel to Hoenn and gather up Valrem’s old ‘friends’ I’m sure they would adore our rendezvous plans with him.”

At the conclusion of Darach’s plan, he looked flushed with pride. Dahlia and Argenta appeared to be bought by the Valet’s plan whereas the more logical of the five, Thorton, Palmer, and Brandon simply shook their heads. The three mumbled about the obvious flaws in the plan and began discussing amongst themselves again. Angered by the condemnation of his plot, Darach opened his mouth to speak but he was cut off by Argenta, whom stood from her seat and addressed the group.

“What’s wrong with you!?” She snapped, her eyes fixed mainly on palmer and Thorton, “You can’t possibly be the same Brains that once announced openly that we could do anything together. You’ve given the situation up as hopeless and here Darach has demonstrated a sense of hope, I don’t deny that it is but a faint sliver, but it is hope nonetheless; and you reject it! If this is the end, I for one plan to do everything in my power to at least give Deoxys…err. I mean, Valrem a run for his money!”

She was panting from over enthusiasm by the time she had finished. Palmer and Thorton looked dumbfounded while Dahlia and Darach appeared like they could give her a standing ovation. Brandon nodded, but this time, he was smiling.

“The matron is right,” Brandon said, “It is our duty to do our best to defend this world and to go down fighting. Darach has been so kind as to produce for us a plan of action. I suggest that as a last-resort, we follow it. A perhaps, if Arceus wills, we can drive Deoxys off. If we’re going to do anything, we have to o it right and that means fast. I will go and gather as many other Brains as I can; I suggest that you five seek out Commander Saturn and perhaps Charon.”

With that, Brandon left the room, no doubt headed for the Hoenn Frontier. The other five Brains sat there for a moment before one by one, they stood, the last to do so being Argenta. After holding a quick discussion on the subject of how exactly to track down Saturn, they turned their separate ways and departed. The last to leave was Argenta, with the excuse that her shoelaces had come undone and that she must wait a moment to fix them.

However, when the other Brains had left, she forgot her shoe, the laces of which remained tied, she reached across the table for the photograph and stared longingly at it. It appeared in the image that Deoxys stood directly behind a stocky man, blocking him mostly from view. Argenta knew that looks could be deceiving. She also knew that there were not two beings in the picture. There was only one.





I know that not a lot has happened in the last few chapters and I have answered no mysteries and I've introduced a lot of new ones but bear with me, in the next chapter, many secrets will be revealed.
 
RE: Pulse of the Frontier - Chapter Six is up! (Who is Valrem? Find out soon)

Ooohhh cool! I'm seriously likin' this now! Great work as usual! If'love Argenta and Darach! More please!
 
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