Writing Seven Days of Horror
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After enjoying his piece of cake, Ash went to the e-mailbox. To his great surprise, it contained an envelope, from a Mr. Phantom Baby Steale Phan P Gio Phantom Baby Steal DAM IT Phantom Baby WHY AM I SO CLUMPSY???? Giovanni Phantom Baby Stealer. In it was a rather well-writen safety manual for a blender. Ash did not know the dangers of putting one's hand inside a blender, and was therefore very happy with his letter. As Ash turned the page to see if there would be even more interesting information on the back, he noticed a letter directed at what he assumed to be him (as he was the only disgusting child around). He went to his mommy to show her the letter, as the waiter went to get some more cake.
Ash now had to decide which 4 human guests he would bring. He decided to go with the people he knew best: Todd Snap, the guy with the camera who appeared in some episodes and who got his own game for some reason (he also has a last name, which makes him a very excellent choice), Dawn, because of the skirt, Agatha, the love of his life, and the waiter.
"We especially shouldn't let Misty come, she's ugly."
Misty almost chocked on her piece of cake. If it weren't for the waiter, she might've died just then and there. Wow, makes you think, doesn't it? About how precious life is, how we should cherish every moment of it. We're all so frail, so easily broken, death is the rule, and life the exception. Oh how truly blessed we all are to be on this planet, living, breathing. Truly life is a wonderful experience.
Meanwhile, Team Rocket was playing Twister *insert sexual innuendo*
Even more meanwhile, in the Baby Stealing inc. Headquarters, Director Phantom B. Stealer was walking from one side of his office to the other, discussing his evil plans. However, the walls failed to respond.
"Why did I even start a company without any employees?", he questioned, but there was nobody around to hear him. (So, did he make a sound?)
Like a metaphor, he kept talking to himself, it had become sort of a habit.
"Did you pack enough babies?"
"All 4 of them, mom!"
"Good luck, Ash! have a nice trip! Enjoy! Don't stay up past 9! Don't forget to wear clean underwear! Brush your teeth after every meal! Eat healthy! Exercise regularly! Don't grow fat! Don't you dare grow fat!"
"Don't worry, mom, fat kids don't exist in the world of Pokémon!"
"I hate you!", questioned Misty. However, Ash was long gone...
HOWEVER, Misty found the letter Ash left on the kitchen table, and decided to go follow him because
Meanwhile, Mr. B. Stealer was stroking his cat.
"Your dinner will be here soon"
"Meow, what's wrong with regular catfood, meow?"
"Oh shut up you..."
TO BE CONTINUED...
Ash now had to decide which 4 human guests he would bring. He decided to go with the people he knew best: Todd Snap, the guy with the camera who appeared in some episodes and who got his own game for some reason (he also has a last name, which makes him a very excellent choice), Dawn, because of the skirt, Agatha, the love of his life, and the waiter.
"We especially shouldn't let Misty come, she's ugly."
Misty almost chocked on her piece of cake. If it weren't for the waiter, she might've died just then and there. Wow, makes you think, doesn't it? About how precious life is, how we should cherish every moment of it. We're all so frail, so easily broken, death is the rule, and life the exception. Oh how truly blessed we all are to be on this planet, living, breathing. Truly life is a wonderful experience.
Meanwhile, Team Rocket was playing Twister *insert sexual innuendo*
Even more meanwhile, in the Baby Stealing inc. Headquarters, Director Phantom B. Stealer was walking from one side of his office to the other, discussing his evil plans. However, the walls failed to respond.
"Why did I even start a company without any employees?", he questioned, but there was nobody around to hear him. (So, did he make a sound?)
Like a metaphor, he kept talking to himself, it had become sort of a habit.
"Did you pack enough babies?"
"All 4 of them, mom!"
"Good luck, Ash! have a nice trip! Enjoy! Don't stay up past 9! Don't forget to wear clean underwear! Brush your teeth after every meal! Eat healthy! Exercise regularly! Don't grow fat! Don't you dare grow fat!"
"Don't worry, mom, fat kids don't exist in the world of Pokémon!"
"I hate you!", questioned Misty. However, Ash was long gone...
HOWEVER, Misty found the letter Ash left on the kitchen table, and decided to go follow him because
Meanwhile, Mr. B. Stealer was stroking his cat.
"Your dinner will be here soon"
"Meow, what's wrong with regular catfood, meow?"
"Oh shut up you..."
TO BE CONTINUED...
PMJ
Silhouette Gloom of the Sundown Lands
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looooooooooooooooool
Oh man. The funny thing about this is that in the first draft of chapter one (of 27772) it had a big scene where Ash's mom and Misty were doing some sort of team limbo game and it was chock full of innuendo. I deleted it cause it was dumb. It also had a conversation between Ash and Professor Oak where Oak hinted at himself being a pedophile (but really it was because he is a limbo champion).
Yeah. Needless to say, the revised version is a lot better and a lot less stupid ;/
I can't get enough of that image, lol
This is great stuff c-m, GO BACON GO
Oh man. The funny thing about this is that in the first draft of chapter one (of 27772) it had a big scene where Ash's mom and Misty were doing some sort of team limbo game and it was chock full of innuendo. I deleted it cause it was dumb. It also had a conversation between Ash and Professor Oak where Oak hinted at himself being a pedophile (but really it was because he is a limbo champion).
Yeah. Needless to say, the revised version is a lot better and a lot less stupid ;/
I can't get enough of that image, lol
This is great stuff c-m, GO BACON GO
Ash contemplated his empty suitcase. It wasn't very large, so he could only pack it with essentials. He looked around his room for things to take, running through a mental checklist. Clothes? Check. Deodorant? Check. Babies? Check. Too bad he couldn't find his toothbrush... oh well. After filling it with everything he needed, he sat on the suitcase to cram everything in and heaved the zipper across, sealing it shut.
Pikachu watched him in silence, mulling over its options. Ash had told it that no Pokemon were going to be allowed on this trip. This is it, thought Pikachu, this is where I make my escape from this cursed life. I'll move to... to Slateport City! Ash won't be around to know I am gone, and by the time he returns I'll be so far away that not even The Device will be able to find me!
Ash flopped onto his bed and stared at the ceiling. "It sure does suck that I can't take any Pokemon with me..." he said to himself. "I'll have company with Agatha, Dawn, the Waiter and..." he paused "that... that other guy, but it won't be the same without my Pokemon". He turned over to stare at the Pikachu, who was looking out the window, dreaming of sweet sweet freedom.
"But what can I do? The letter was pretty clear, "No Pokemon Allowed". There's just no way that..." Ash stopped in mid thought. He sat up quickly and fumbled in his pockets, pulling out his trusty AR-9000. It sparkled in the setting sun shining through the window.
"Yes! Yes of course!" he exclaimed, punching in codes and hexidecimals and god knows what into the magical device. Pikachu wasn't paying attention, he was too busy thinking about the green fields, blue skies and wild forests that awaited him in his soon to be Ash-less life.
"Yeah, got it!" Yelled Ash in triumph, holding the AR-9000 in his raised hand. Pikachu turned around in horror. "ACTION REPLAY, ACTIVA-"
Glitch.
The entire world froze. Airplanes floated in the air. Cars stood still on the motorways. An enraged Pikachu ready to leap and maul its master, frozen in time.
Two angels descended, frowns upon their pale glowing faces.
"That is the second time he has glitched this week." said one.
"I don't know why we cannot just take the bloody thing off him. He is extremely irresponsible with it" said the other.
"He doesn't like it when we directly intervene" said the First. "He says it disrupts the very fabric of existence, splitting the Universe into an endless stream of infinite possibilities, rendering all of life obsolete and meaningless due to the removal of free will and instead all events being governed by random chaotic quantum effects."
"Oh." Said the Second.
The First approached Ash, and waved a hand over the AR-9000, restructuring the code into something functional. The First withdrew his hand and let out a long, pitiful sigh.
"You'll never guess what he's about to turn that Pikachu into." said the First.
"What?" said the Second.
"You'll see." said the First. The Angels floated away, and time began to flow again. The world had not changed... not much, anyway. There was one less Pikachu in Kanto now, and in its place there was a very upset looking yellow toothbrush being stuffed into a suitcase by a gleeful Ash.
Pikachu watched him in silence, mulling over its options. Ash had told it that no Pokemon were going to be allowed on this trip. This is it, thought Pikachu, this is where I make my escape from this cursed life. I'll move to... to Slateport City! Ash won't be around to know I am gone, and by the time he returns I'll be so far away that not even The Device will be able to find me!
Ash flopped onto his bed and stared at the ceiling. "It sure does suck that I can't take any Pokemon with me..." he said to himself. "I'll have company with Agatha, Dawn, the Waiter and..." he paused "that... that other guy, but it won't be the same without my Pokemon". He turned over to stare at the Pikachu, who was looking out the window, dreaming of sweet sweet freedom.
"But what can I do? The letter was pretty clear, "No Pokemon Allowed". There's just no way that..." Ash stopped in mid thought. He sat up quickly and fumbled in his pockets, pulling out his trusty AR-9000. It sparkled in the setting sun shining through the window.
"Yes! Yes of course!" he exclaimed, punching in codes and hexidecimals and god knows what into the magical device. Pikachu wasn't paying attention, he was too busy thinking about the green fields, blue skies and wild forests that awaited him in his soon to be Ash-less life.
"Yeah, got it!" Yelled Ash in triumph, holding the AR-9000 in his raised hand. Pikachu turned around in horror. "ACTION REPLAY, ACTIVA-"
Glitch.
The entire world froze. Airplanes floated in the air. Cars stood still on the motorways. An enraged Pikachu ready to leap and maul its master, frozen in time.
Two angels descended, frowns upon their pale glowing faces.
"That is the second time he has glitched this week." said one.
"I don't know why we cannot just take the bloody thing off him. He is extremely irresponsible with it" said the other.
"He doesn't like it when we directly intervene" said the First. "He says it disrupts the very fabric of existence, splitting the Universe into an endless stream of infinite possibilities, rendering all of life obsolete and meaningless due to the removal of free will and instead all events being governed by random chaotic quantum effects."
"Oh." Said the Second.
The First approached Ash, and waved a hand over the AR-9000, restructuring the code into something functional. The First withdrew his hand and let out a long, pitiful sigh.
"You'll never guess what he's about to turn that Pikachu into." said the First.
"What?" said the Second.
"You'll see." said the First. The Angels floated away, and time began to flow again. The world had not changed... not much, anyway. There was one less Pikachu in Kanto now, and in its place there was a very upset looking yellow toothbrush being stuffed into a suitcase by a gleeful Ash.
Awesome 
GO MATT GO.
GO MATT GO.
EPIC job.
But here:
You should've said:
But here:
You should've said:
EPIC POST.bacon said:
But, yeah, the thesaurus gives us such awesome alternatives as "Astronomical", "Monumental", "Formidable", "Awesome", "Wonderful", "Striking", "Over-whelming", "Mind-blowing", "Impressive", "Breathtaking", "Majestic", "Formidable", "Fascinating", "Incredible" and so much more.
And all of them fall short of describing this EPIC story.
PMJ
Silhouette Gloom of the Sundown Lands
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The waiter is more c-m's thing so I hope that I don't disgrace him, forgive me if that happens.
CHAPTER... THREE?: The Astronomical, Monumental, Formidable, Awesome, Wonderful, Striking, Overwhelming, Mind-blowing, Impressive, Breathtaking, Majestic, Formidable, Fascinating, Incredible Adventures of Pikachu the Toothbrush... And So Much More
For the second time in one day, Pikachu was enveloped in total darkness.
However, this time was different. Instead of welcoming the sweet release of merciful death, Pikachu was now a toothbrush and stuffed between seven pairs of briefs and deodorant which, to Pikachu, smelled like Rapidash vomit. The smell was horrid, and Pikachu tried to barf, but much to his dismay, he was incapable of such at thing, as he had no features with which to expel his puke. Mystically enough, his sense of smell was intact, and so he had no choice but to endure the stench.
He tried holding his breath, but quickly found out he had no breath to hold. Toothbrushes don't need to breathe. They don't need to smell, either, but then again, this was Ash we were talking about. Ash in control of a device as powerful as the AR-9000 was like trying to sky dive using a Pikachu as a parachute.
The toothbrush sighed as much as a toothbrush could sigh. He hoped he'd never have to go through that again. It was a miracle either of them were alive. Now that he thought about it, the AR-9000 was probably the reason they survived that ordeal...
He tried to fall asleep to pass the time, but to his horror, toothbrushes didn't need to sleep, either. He was forced to sit there, awake and completely alert, until Ash needed him.
Meanwhile, Ash was on the phone with Todd Snap.
"So, who are you again?" Ash wondered.
"My name's Todd. I'm a photographer," Mr. Snap explained.
"Have we ever met, Todd?" Ash wondered a second time.
"I'm not sure. I have my own game, though, so I'm pretty important," Todd explained a second time.
"Dude, that's great, because I have a game of my own too! Ever played Pokemon Puzzle Challenge? It's all about me!!" Ash did not wonder, but rather exclaimed as he tried breaking the fourth wall, but didn't quite get it.
"Your game sucks. Mine is way better!" the Taker of Pictures of Pocket Monsters countered, having played the game in question.
Elsewhere...
DING DONG
The waiter answered the door. "Le yes?"
Agatha punched the waiter in his gut. "Let me in!" she screeched in a voice that Ash found very arousing. She stepped over the waiter, who was on the ground and in pain.
"Sorry, le ma'am," the waiter squeaked out as he rubbed his stomach.
Suddenly, Agatha was filled with some sort of nostalgia, and she too felt like rubbing her stomach as only pregnant old ladies do.
So she did.
It was amazing. She felt like nothing she'd ever felt like before, like she was flying through the air with a flock of Pidgey (she liked Pidgey) and they were attacking a bunch of Gliscor (she hated Gliscor, but didn't really know why).
"Mmmm," the old crone said as she continued to rub her stomach.
Meanwhile...
"AT LEAST MY GAME HAS REAL POKEMON IN IT!" Todd screamed at the other person.
"OH YEAH??? WELL AT LEAST PEOPLE KNOW WHO I AM!" Ash retaliated.
Todd felt like he'd been hit in his stomach. He grasped it tightly. "That hurt," Todd said.
"Yeah bro, I'm sorry man. Shoot, it's all good, yo. Drop by my crib and we'll chill a minute fo we leave, aight?" Ash gangstered.
"Sure, sounds like fun," Todd said as he hung up. He hopped in the ZERO-ONE, ready for takeoff, despite the craft having no visible controls, seats, seat belts, doors, or windows. With the power of his snappy mind (that's what we call a pun), he ordered the mysterious craft to fly straight for Pallet Town, and it did, despite never having been to Pallet Town.
"Now that that's done, I think I'll brush my teeth. It's been a long day," Ash said. He went to his suitcase and dug out his yellow toothbrush. He carried it to the bathroom and started to sing.
"IF YOU WANNA BE MY LOVER, YOU GOTTA GET WITH MY FRIENDS"
Pikachu really wished he could die. As Ash squirted toothpaste onto Pikachu's bristles, the toothbrush came up with a plan. "I've come up with a plan!" If Pikachu could grin evilly, he would have. "I'll wait until he puts me in his mouth, then I'll shock the pants off him! Surely that will put him out of his misery!"
Ash continued humming his favorite song as he began brushing. Pikachu gathered up as much electric energy as he could and expelled it with so much force he felt like his body would explode from the force. In a way, Pikachu hoped it would. The vibration from the blast felt so powerful it was like an earthquake in his own body.
"BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ" went the toothbrush.
"Cool, electric toothbrush!" Ash said with glee as he continued humming and scrubbing.
Pikachu really wished he could die.
Elsewhere...
DING DONG
The waiter answered the door. "Le yes?"
Agatha Todd Snap punched the waiter in his gut. "Let me in!" she he screeched in a voice that Ash found very arousing. She He stepped over the waiter, who was on the ground and in pain.
"Sorry, lema'am sir," the waiter squeaked out as he rubbed his stomach.
CHAPTER... THREE?: The Astronomical, Monumental, Formidable, Awesome, Wonderful, Striking, Overwhelming, Mind-blowing, Impressive, Breathtaking, Majestic, Formidable, Fascinating, Incredible Adventures of Pikachu the Toothbrush... And So Much More
For the second time in one day, Pikachu was enveloped in total darkness.
However, this time was different. Instead of welcoming the sweet release of merciful death, Pikachu was now a toothbrush and stuffed between seven pairs of briefs and deodorant which, to Pikachu, smelled like Rapidash vomit. The smell was horrid, and Pikachu tried to barf, but much to his dismay, he was incapable of such at thing, as he had no features with which to expel his puke. Mystically enough, his sense of smell was intact, and so he had no choice but to endure the stench.
He tried holding his breath, but quickly found out he had no breath to hold. Toothbrushes don't need to breathe. They don't need to smell, either, but then again, this was Ash we were talking about. Ash in control of a device as powerful as the AR-9000 was like trying to sky dive using a Pikachu as a parachute.
The toothbrush sighed as much as a toothbrush could sigh. He hoped he'd never have to go through that again. It was a miracle either of them were alive. Now that he thought about it, the AR-9000 was probably the reason they survived that ordeal...
He tried to fall asleep to pass the time, but to his horror, toothbrushes didn't need to sleep, either. He was forced to sit there, awake and completely alert, until Ash needed him.
Meanwhile, Ash was on the phone with Todd Snap.
"So, who are you again?" Ash wondered.
"My name's Todd. I'm a photographer," Mr. Snap explained.
"Have we ever met, Todd?" Ash wondered a second time.
"I'm not sure. I have my own game, though, so I'm pretty important," Todd explained a second time.
"Dude, that's great, because I have a game of my own too! Ever played Pokemon Puzzle Challenge? It's all about me!!" Ash did not wonder, but rather exclaimed as he tried breaking the fourth wall, but didn't quite get it.
"Your game sucks. Mine is way better!" the Taker of Pictures of Pocket Monsters countered, having played the game in question.
Elsewhere...
DING DONG
The waiter answered the door. "Le yes?"
Agatha punched the waiter in his gut. "Let me in!" she screeched in a voice that Ash found very arousing. She stepped over the waiter, who was on the ground and in pain.
"Sorry, le ma'am," the waiter squeaked out as he rubbed his stomach.
Suddenly, Agatha was filled with some sort of nostalgia, and she too felt like rubbing her stomach as only pregnant old ladies do.
So she did.
It was amazing. She felt like nothing she'd ever felt like before, like she was flying through the air with a flock of Pidgey (she liked Pidgey) and they were attacking a bunch of Gliscor (she hated Gliscor, but didn't really know why).
"Mmmm," the old crone said as she continued to rub her stomach.
Meanwhile...
"AT LEAST MY GAME HAS REAL POKEMON IN IT!" Todd screamed at the other person.
"OH YEAH??? WELL AT LEAST PEOPLE KNOW WHO I AM!" Ash retaliated.
Todd felt like he'd been hit in his stomach. He grasped it tightly. "That hurt," Todd said.
"Yeah bro, I'm sorry man. Shoot, it's all good, yo. Drop by my crib and we'll chill a minute fo we leave, aight?" Ash gangstered.
"Sure, sounds like fun," Todd said as he hung up. He hopped in the ZERO-ONE, ready for takeoff, despite the craft having no visible controls, seats, seat belts, doors, or windows. With the power of his snappy mind (that's what we call a pun), he ordered the mysterious craft to fly straight for Pallet Town, and it did, despite never having been to Pallet Town.
"Now that that's done, I think I'll brush my teeth. It's been a long day," Ash said. He went to his suitcase and dug out his yellow toothbrush. He carried it to the bathroom and started to sing.
"IF YOU WANNA BE MY LOVER, YOU GOTTA GET WITH MY FRIENDS"
Pikachu really wished he could die. As Ash squirted toothpaste onto Pikachu's bristles, the toothbrush came up with a plan. "I've come up with a plan!" If Pikachu could grin evilly, he would have. "I'll wait until he puts me in his mouth, then I'll shock the pants off him! Surely that will put him out of his misery!"
Ash continued humming his favorite song as he began brushing. Pikachu gathered up as much electric energy as he could and expelled it with so much force he felt like his body would explode from the force. In a way, Pikachu hoped it would. The vibration from the blast felt so powerful it was like an earthquake in his own body.
"BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ" went the toothbrush.
"Cool, electric toothbrush!" Ash said with glee as he continued humming and scrubbing.
Pikachu really wished he could die.
Elsewhere...
DING DONG
The waiter answered the door. "Le yes?"
"Sorry, le
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