Writing Legend of Lucario (COMPLETE!)

Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris

I'm Chuck Norris. And your not. Ha ha.
Member
Chapter Index:
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Chapter 35
Chapter 36

Well, I was playing Mystery Dungeon this one day, and at one part they talked about a Lucario that appaently had 'The best rescue team ever' or something like that. So I thought I'd make something on why that is. Enjoy.

"It is described in mythology as the Pokémon that shaped the universe with it's 1,000 arms"-Pokémon Diamond on Arceus.

Before the universe dawned, there was a powerful deity named Arceus. It was said to have created the universe, and all the planets. On one of those planets, he created Mew, the first of beings now known as "Pokémon". These Pokémon had incredible powers, and used them to create civilazations and empires on this planet. But soon Pokémon also began using their powers for evil deeds, led by Darkrai, easily the most evil of all Pokémon. Slowly, their planet began deteriorating due to the barren waste the evil had left it. Arceus solved the problem by creating Humans, and gave them the ability and technology to capture and control Pokémon. Soon, the planet began to blossom with fresh life, and peace was restored. But Darkrai escaped. It hid away on a place called New Moon island, thinking of a way to overtake Arceus as the God of all Pokémon. One day, after years of plotting against Arceus, it learned of a way to rule the world as the most powerful being the universe had ever intended to have. Arceus, however was aware of this, and chose a human to go back in time, and stop Darkrai before his evil plan even began. This is the story of that human.

"Urgh...my head..."

Jin awoke groggily. He then felt a cold rush of air. Why was there cold air? Kanto usually has a very warm climate. He then realized he was in a forest in which he did not regonize. Snow covered the trees and ground everywhere. Was he dreaming? He rubbed a hand on his head. Except it wasn't a hand. It was a paw. He looked all around his body. Paw-like hands and feet, blue fur...He had become a Lucario.

"Hey! What are you doing?" He heard a feminine voice say. He looked and saw a Weavile. No way, Pokémon can't talk... but he figured if he somehow was turned into a Pokémon, he could now understand the language of Pokémon.

"I said 'What are you doing'?" Asked the Weavile again.

"Oh, um...nothing." Said Jin shyly.

"Then, shall we go on?" Said the Weavile in a persisting voice.

"Huh? Go where?" Asked Jin, confused.

"Sheesh, did you get amnesia or something?" Said the Weavile. "We're going to see Rayquaza!"

"R-Rayquaza?" Said Jin, a bit startled. He had heard of Rayquaza, but was never actually sure if it existed.

"Yeah," Said the Weavile "I was going to see Rayquaza, and along the way I met up with you, and you said you were also going to see him, so we decided to go together, and right now we just stopped for a rest."

"Oh, right, I remember." Jin lied.

"By the way, I never caught your name. What is it?"

"Jin."

"Jin, huh? Mine's Kurai." Said the Weavile. "Now, shall we continue?"

"Okay." Said Jin. He had no idea what was going on, but decided the best thing was to go along with it.

Suddenly, they heard a rustle in the trees. Jin turned, and before he could react, a large Mightyena lunged at him. Jin quickly jumped out of the way.

"Well, well," Said the Mightyena with a hungry look on it's face. "Looks like I'm getting two servings of dinner today!"

"As if," Said Kurai. "C'mon Jin, let's show off our fighting skills!"

I would like it if you added a comment/constructive critiscism on this story, or else it will probably die.
 
RE: Legend of Lucario

I like it. It is pretty good and can't wait for more. The chapter isn't too long or short, it is just right and it was pretty exciting and was descriptive enough to imagine. Good job!
 
RE: Legend of Lucario

One could describe this as a brief intro... but it's not bad at all! I've seen a LOT worse than this... you've set the stage very well with your beginning. I personally think ALL stories should have some form of intro like that - not necessarily along the same vein, but something for the reader to get their teeth into and to set the stage for what's going to happen.

Grammatically, it's mostly right. You've got the spacing right. But be a little careful of the capitalization after speech. It is correct to NOT capitalize after speech when you end with a question mark (to my knowledge) when you aren't starting a new sentence. If you're starting something new then capitalize, but if it's just "said so and so" then don't.

Other than that, not bad! Keep it up and you'll have me reading a lot more ;)
 
RE: Legend of Lucario

This is way better then mine I love how you got the idea on how to make the fan-fac. I love this You will catch my bview when You update it. AWESOME START!
 
RE: Legend of Lucario

Here's Chapter Two!


Jin Gulped. He had been a skilled trainer as a human, but he wasn't sure if he could do it himself. Nontheless, he got ready for battle. The Mightyena lunged towards him, raising his claws to strike, but Jin gave him a right uppercut, knocking it backwards.

"Impressive." Said Kurai. "Now how 'bout I finish the deal?" Kurai lunged towards the Mightyena and slashed it with her claws. The Mightyena yelped before collapsing to the ground. Two deep clawmarks were visible on his chest.

"He'll be alright." Said Kurai. "Now why don't we get going?" With that, Kurai and Jin continued their journey. Meanwhile, questions began filling Jin's head again. How did he turn into a Lucario? He pinched himself. Nope, not dreaming. Than just what was happening? He was sure that Kurai would have no idea what he was talking about and call him crazy, so he just continued to follow her. After a couple of minutes walking across the path, they came to a hill.

"It should be right over this hill." Said Kurai as they began to walk up it. Soon they reached the top, and what Jin saw made his jaw drop.

Kurai noticed his expresson and said "What, don't tell me you thought we'd be the only one's here?"

Hundreds, no, Thousands of Pokémon covered a large, flat area of land. There were tents, small shacks too, apparently there were other groups of Pokémon that had settled here. But was most amazing was that in the sky, there seemed to be a large palace like place, completely made of clouds.

"C'mon, Jin, let's set up a camp and wait for Rayquaza to come." Said Kurai as they headed for the area.

"Welcome to my shop. Whaddya need?" Said a Hairyama. Jin and Kurai were standing in front of a shack with "Hairyama's Shop" Scrawled on it.

"You got a tent or something?" Asked Kurai.

"Sure. That's 400 Pokédollars." Said the Hairyama as it pulled out a tent kit.

"Hold on." Said Kurai. She reached into the large crown shaped hair on her head, rummaged through it a bit, and pulled out a couple coins and gave them to the Hairyama. "There ya go."

"Pleasure doin' buisness with you." Said the Hairyama.

"So, now that we have a camp and stuff, what do we do now?" Asked Jin, hoping his question wasn't stupid.

"Well, I guess we just wait for Rayquaza." Said Kurai. "Now, how do we go about the means of starting a fire-" As if planned, a Blaziken walked by.

"Hey you! Could you help us with this fire here?" Said Jin.

"Hmm?" Grunted the Blaziken as he turned toward Jin with a look that intimidated Jin.

"Oh, um, me and my friend here would like you to start a fire."

"You and your friend?" Said the Blaziken coldly as it looked at Jin, then Kurai. "Now isn't that a sight, having a Dark Pokémon here."

"Yeah whatever, just start the fire." Said Kurai, getting annoyed by him. Almost effortlessly the Blaziken fired a fireball from it's hands onto the pile of wood, igniting a bright flame before leaving.

"Sheesh, that guy gave me the creeps." Said Kurai. "Well, we did get a fire."

Jin nodded in agreement then stuck out his hands into the fire to warm them up from the frozen conditions of the forest. But as quickly as the Blaziken had lighted the fire, a gust of wind blew it out. Then it started happening to everyone's fires.

"Hey, what's going-" Said Jin, but then saw something that answered his question was answered. The bottom large cloud palace in the air had opened up, releasing a gust of wind. Then from that opening, with a loud roar, Rayquaza emerged.
 
RE: Legend of Lucario

Very good! Nothing that is bad about it. It was very good. Can't wait for more!
 
RE: Legend of Lucario

Here's Chapter 3!


Jin had to put everything he had into preventing himself from gasping. The legendary Pokémon Rayquaza was flying in the air above. Had he still been a human, he would've grabbed the Masterball he'd been saving for his whole life and chuck it at the dragon. He silently cursed himself for being a Pokémon.

"Greetings, my people." Boomed the Rayquaza in a high and powerful tone. "I would like to thank you all for devoting yourselves to becoming your own Rescue Teams."

Rescue Teams? What was that? Jin wondered. He then realized he had never asked Kurai why exactly they were going to see Rayquaza. He prayed for an explanation on what a rescue team was.

"As you know," Continued Rayquaza. "As a member of a Rescue Team, you are to save Pokémon who have been subject to being exposed to natural disasters, losing their way, or being a victim of a Criminal Pokémon." Jin silently let out a sigh of releif on hearing an explanation.

"Now, take these." Said the Rayquaza. From the hole in the palace in which it came, thousands of white badges shaped like eggs with wings began falling from the sky. Jin was able to grab one. "After completing your mission, hold this badge out to the rescued Pokémon. It will transport all of you back here. It will also teleport you to the destination of where the distress signal came from."

"Now," Continued Rayquaza, "There are two ways to accept a mission. One is to have a message personally delivered to you via Pelliper. But if your new here, chances are no one's heard of you, so you can go to the Message Board, directly below this castle." All eyes turned to under the castle, where a large bulletin board was. "There are various missions posted there. Anyone may accept them. That is all you need to know. I wish you all good luck." With that, Ryquaza flew back into the palace made of clouds, and the door closed.

"Well, Jin, how about we go check out that message board?" Said Kurai.

"O-oh, right." Said Jin, still somewhat in awe of seeing Rayquaza. The two then walked towards the message board, were all the others had gathered as well. Kurai spotted one and took it.

"Hey, Jin, this Mission's in Frosty Forest. I'm familiar with the place, so let's go there, why don't we check it out?"

"Sure." Said Jin. He secretly hoped it would be easy, after all he still really didn't know how strong he truly was. Before he could ponder any more, the badge he still hadn't taken out of his hand began to glow and engulf them in a light so bright Jin couldn't see anything. When the light ended Jin and Kurai were in the forest in which Jin awoke to be a Pokémon. So this place is called Frosty Forest, huh?Thought Jin. His thoughts were soon interrupted by voices.

"Are you the rescue team that came to help us?"

"Oh, thank you!"

Jin looked and saw a Sudowoodo and a Mr. Mime with looks of panic on their faces.

"So just what's the problem?" Asked Kurai.

"It's terrible," Said the Sudowoodo. "Me and my friend Mr. Mime were out exploring with our kids when we were seperated!"

"We've been looking for hours but they're nowhere!" Said the Mr. Mime franticly.

"Hey, no prob, we'll find your kids, right Jin?" Said Kurai.

"Right!" Said Jin. Pokémon or not, he still thought he should help anyone in need.

"Then let's go! Said Kurai, as she and Jin headed towards the depths of Frosty Forest.

I apologize if this was a boring chapter, but Jin really had to know what he was doing. They'll start getting more actiony now.
 
RE: Legend of Lucario

Don't worry about one chapter that dosen't have a lot of action, stories with nothing but action end up being bad stories. Keep up the good work!
 
RE: Legend of Lucario

I like Pokeymanz said:
"Hey, no prob, we'll find your kids, right Jin?" Said Jin.
Click to expand...


Other than that, it was a good chapter. Though you need to fix that...
 
RE: Legend of Lucario

Here's the next chapter, where the REAL plot starts to unfold...



Jin and Kurai had been traveling through the forest for some time now, looking for the Sudowoodo and Mr. Mime's kids while fighting off various Pokémon, when Jin remembered something he had wanted to asked Kurai.

"Hey, Kurai," Asked Jin.

"What is it, Jin?"

"That Blaziken said it was unusual for you to be there. Why is that?"

"Well," Responded Kurai. "Dark Pokémon are gaining a reputation for doing all sorts of crimes and dirty work."

"Oh." Said Jin. He then felt kind of bad for asking.

"I don't mind," Said Kurai, seeing Jin's expression. "After all, it is sort of true. I might be like that too, but my parents abandoned me at birth, so I have no idea about regular Dark Pokémon customs."

"Your parents abandoned you?" Said Jin, shocked.

"Like I said, Dark Pokémon are gaining a reputation." Said Kurai. Suddenly, and without warning a scream echoed throughout the woods.

"Do you think that could be those kids?" Asked Jin.

"Likely. We should check it out then!" Said Kurai alertly as they headed in the direction of the screams. When they arrived at the scene, they saw a Bonsly and Mime Jr. being surrounded by three Murkrow.

"Hey, you guys, stop that!" Said Jin to the Murkrow.

"Well, well, and just who might you be?" Asked one of the Mukrow. "Well, whatever. Sorry, but I can't just give you these kiddies right here. We're givin' these to da boss, see? Da boss' gotta please HIS boss, see?"

"Well, it looks like your boss isn't going to be pleased today then." Said Jin. "We'll be taking those kids back."

"It seems you need to be taught not to mess with us the hard way." Sneered the Murkrow. "Let's get 'em boys!" The three Murkrow then flew at Jin and Kurai. One of them flew right at Jin's head, but almost instinctively Jin fired an Aura Sphere at it, knocking it backwards. Another one flew for Kurai, who reacted by blowing an Icy Wind at it, causing the Murkrow to collapse in a freezing state. The last one tried to try a sneak attack on Jin, but using the sense he had obtained by becoming a Pokémon, he was able to detect it, and delivered a swift kick to the Murkrow sending it colliding into the pile of other beaten Murkrows.

"Tch, you win this round, punks." Said one of the Murkrow in obvious agony. "Those kids probably wouldn't have been worth much anyway. Let's go guys." And with that, the Murkrows flew away. Jin and Kurai then approached the terrified Bonsly and Mime Jr.

"A-a-a-are you going to hurt us?" Said the Mime Jr.

"Don't worry, we're a rescue team, here to save you." Said Jin calmly.

"Really? Does that mean you'll bring us back to our parents?" Said the Bonsly.

"Yes." Said Jin. With that his badge began to shine, until the light surrounded them all, sending them out the forest.
 
RE: Legend of Lucario

Cool, it was a really good chapter. Wonderful job!
 
RE: Legend of Lucario

Here's the next chapter!

After the rescue of the Mime Jr. and Bonsly, Jin and Kurai headed back to their camp to stock up on supplies and rest.

"All in a days work, right Kurai?" Said Jin, taking a bite out of an apple.

"Yeah, though there was something strange about what those Murkrow said." Said Kurai with a puzzled look on her face.

"What's that?" Questioned Jin.

"Well, they said their boss has to please his boss. Now by 'Their Boss' they likely meant a Honchkrow. But Honchkrow, aside from the pack of Murkrow that they lead, tend to be loners from everyone else."

"Oh. I'm sure it's nothing. Maybe there's two Honchkrows or something." Said Jin without much care in the subject.

"Yeah, you're probably right." Agreed Kurai.

A few weeks went by. Jin and Kurai went on some more missions, rescuing Pokémon in various places, and forgot everything about those Murkrow. After a couple of missions, they were upgraded from Normal Rank to Bronze Rank.

"Wow, is this badge cool-looking or what?" Said Jin, holding his new badge. It looked almost identical to the one before, though it was a bronze color.

"Yeah, sure is something." Said Kurai. Their amazement of the badge, however, was short lived, as the cloud castle's bottom began opening again. Everyone turned and looked at the spectacle that was occuring. Jin wondered what was happening. Was Rayquaza going to say something again?

This time, it wasn't Rayquaza that came out. It was a Blaziken and Charizard that came jumping out of the castle.

"Hey Jin, isn't that the Blaziken from when we first got here?" Asked Kurai. Jin looked at him closely, and could tell it was in fact the Blaziken from before. Jin heared whispers from other Pokémon talking about them.

"Wow, isn't that team Fireblaze?"

"Yeah, they're a Gold-Ranked team, it must be an important mission!"

"The Charizard's name is Mokutan, the Blaziken's Hinote, I think."

"I wish I could be like them!"

Suddenly Kurai got a crooked look on her face. "Hey Jin, why don't we follow them?"

"W-what do you mean, Kurai?" Said Jin.

"C'mon, don't you want to see some Gold-Ranked members in action? It's not like we'll be interfering with their work, we'll just secretly watch and learn."

"Well, when you put it like that, it sounds okay." Said Jin, as they began to follow them into Frosty Forest.

As always, please comment or give cronstructive criticsm. Also, with school starting again, updates will be slower.
 
RE: Legend of Lucario

It was a great chapter except one spelling mistake.

I like Pokeymanz said:
Here's the next chapter!

After the rescue of the Mime Jr. and Bonsly, Jin and Kurai headed back ot their camp to stock up on supplies and rest.
Click to expand...

It should be to, not ot, lol.
 
RE: Legend of Lucario

Alright, here's the next chapter, and prehaps the last until next saturday.

As the Charizard and Blaziken walked through Frosty Forest, secretly being followed by Jin and Kurai, they began to converse amongst themselves, with Jin and Kurai listening in.

"Hey Hinote, why do you think this is such an important mission?" Asked the Charizard.

"Dunno, Mokutan." Said the Blaziken apparently named Hinote without much of a care. Jin and Kurai could tell by the tone of his voice he was definetly the Blaziken from when they first arrived.

"Rayquaza said it was some Honchkrow causing trouble, but I don't see the big deal behind that." Replied the Charizard named Mokutan.

"Hey Kurai, do you think that has to do with those Murkrow we encountered a few weeks ago?" Said Jin, barely his breath.

"I knew there was something fishy about them." Whispered Kurai back. Taking unhearble footsteps behind Mokutan and Hinote. They followed them for a while until the came to a stop.

"Did you hear that?" Said Mokutan. Fear flowed into Jin's body. Had they discovered them?

"Yeah. He's here." Said Hinote. Just then, Jin heard a loud woosh through the trees, before in full veiw in front of Hinote and Mokutan, a Honchkrow emerged.

"Oh dear, I screwed up." Cackled the Honchkrow. "I was going for a sneak attack, but I accidently brushed against some leaves when I saw that there were more than just you two." The fire rescue team turned and saw Jin and Kurai following them.

"What are you doing here?! This is dangerous!" Demanded Mokutan.

"Umm...watching and learning?" Said Kurai with an innocent smile on her face.

"Well then, I guess you can learn how to die!" Said the Honchkrow with an evil laugh as it lunged towards Jin and Kurai, only to be tackled to ground by Mokutan.

"Sorry, not if I can help it." He said. However to his apperent surprise the Honchkrow jumped up instantly and used it's wing to strike a night slash, throwing Mokutan backwards and slightly injured, though he kept his fighting stance. Hinote then jumped at the Honchkrow, but It whirlwinded him, sending him flying in the sky. It then almost instantly flew right up to Hinote using another Night Slash to throw him to the ground, apperently knocking him out. Mokutan stared in disbeleif, aghast of how powerful the Honchkrow was.

"Th-that power, it ain't that of a normal Honchkrows..."

"You bet your tail I ain't a normal Honchkrow." Said the Honchkrow with a smirk on it's face. "I'm a member of the Dark Six, Kyouto!"

"Dark...Six?" Said Mokutan with fear in his voice of what that could be.

"I reckon you haven't heard of us." Said the Honchkrow. "We try to keep our doings in secret, so rescue teams don't try to track us down, which gives me every more reason to finish you off." With that, Kyouto opened his mouth and fired a Dark Pulse, sending Mokutan flying backwards as he let out a shreik of pain.

"Jin!" Said Kurai suddenly. "We have to help him!"

"I dunno, he looks tough. Do you really think we can beat him?" Said Jin in a worried voice.

"I'm not sure, but three-on-one is a lot better than one-on-one, don't you agree?" Said Kurai back.

Jin thought about it. "You're right. Alright Kyouto!" He said with power in his voice. "Your fight just got a whole lot tougher!"
 
RE: Legend of Lucario

Very nice chapter...I really liked it and the idea of the Dark Six. Very nice and I can't wait until the next chapter...(Don't care when it comes, i just love this fanfic)
 
RE: Legend of Lucario

You're doing great!! The "Dark Six" is an excellent idea! Can't wait to hear more about them!
 
RE: Legend of Lucario

so this is a theme from mystery dungeon but i say post all the chapters on the one page but great story hard to make sense of the first 2 chapters but great job with the others.
 
RE: Legend of Lucario

Here's the next chapter!

"Kyuoto, prepare to fight!" Said Kurai, striking a fighting pose.

"Oh really? You two wanna play with us? How annoying." Said Kyouto, as if he wasn't taking it seriously.

"You guys...should leave." Said Mokutan, painfully able to stand back up after getting hit by Kyouto's Dark Pulse. "He's...too strong."

"We can't just leave you here!" Said Jin. "You'll die!"

"Yeah! It's the duty of a rescue team to help Pokémon in trouble!" Said Kurai.

"I'll...be fine." Said Mokutan inbetween groans of pain.

"YOU'LL BE DEAD!" Shrieked Kyouto as he flew at Mokutan with rapid speed. However, Jin fired an Aura Sphere, causing Kyouto to dodge therefore missing Mokutan and causing him to land on the ground.

"You annoying little pest, I aught to..."

"TAKE THIS!" Without warning, Kurai had used Quick Attack to appear right next to Kyouto, then slashed at him, giving him some damage and a deep scar on his wing.

"YOU!" Said Kyouto in anger of being damaged and prepared a Dark Pulse attack, but Jin, like Kurai, Extremespeeded towards Kyouto and punched him across the face, sending him backwards.

"Looks like you're a bit slow." Mocked Jin. While all of this was happening, Mokutan watched in his injured state.

"Incredible." He thought. "How can rescue team members of their rank fight at this level? If not for the requirement of completing a certain amount of Missions, they might have the Gold Rank already."

"Alright, you kids have had your fun. But this time..." Said Kyouto. "I AIN'T HOLDIN' BACK!!!" With that he began to charge for a Dark Pulse, and to Jin, it looked as if this one was going to be much more powerful than any before. His mind quickly raced to find an attack to counter it, when he remembered:

Dragon Pulse.

Jin's arm began glowing a bluish color, all of his power seemingly flowing into it. Kyouto fired the Dark Pulse, almost twice as big as the one he had severly damaged Mokutan with.

"Sorry." Said Jin. "But that's not gonna work." Jin pointed his arm and a large blue beam, the size of Kyuoto's Black one, shot out of it. It overpowered Kyouto's, however and blasted him, sending him shrieking and flying bakcwards.

"Nice. Now why don't I finish the deal?" Said Kurai. "ICY WIND!"

From Kurai's mouth, a large gust of blue wind shot out, with tiny ice crystals in them. It hit Kyouto with full force, trapping him within a large chunk of ice, a look of shock and pain still on his face.
 
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