Writing Pokemon Journey Through Life, CHAPTER 11 IS HERE! COME CHECK IT OUT AND COMMENT!
- Thread starter Moneyking63
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RE: Pokemon Journey Through Life, CHAPTER 7 IS HERE! COME CHECK IT OUT AND COMMENT!
Lol Duh
It was just cause i didnt want to leave you out of addressing people But I'm glad you eventually did
Lol Duh
It was just cause i didnt want to leave you out of addressing people But I'm glad you eventually didRE: Pokemon Journey Through Life, CHAPTER 7 IS HERE! COME CHECK IT OUT AND COMMENT!
Yeah, this chapter was pretty good, but there were a lot of mistakes. I know people said this already, but you should probably go through and try to fix them all. I wonder when/if they are going to see a legendary.
Yeah, this chapter was pretty good, but there were a lot of mistakes. I know people said this already, but you should probably go through and try to fix them all. I wonder when/if they are going to see a legendary.
RE: Pokemon Journey Through Life, CHAPTER 7 IS HERE! COME CHECK IT OUT AND COMMENT!
LOL
Ya i need to edit that, I will do it soon. But until then I have completed not only new tc's but Chapter 8, now i super checked this for gramatical errors. Now knowing me there are probably still a ton of mistakes so if you see any let me know Also Muckster I have figured out the perfect place for your character, unfortunately its not going to be for quite a few more chapters. As for chapter 8 drum roll please...bum bum bum bum bum. TA DA!
Chapter 8
Starly was soaring downs headed straight to the ground. It didn’t seem there was anything Matt could do except watch the bird plummet. As Starly was falling its wings suddenly shot up causing it to curve and start to fly. It was awake, but Matt couldn’t figure out what did caused it. Until Starly, which was headed straight for the tree, immediately went vertical and started to glow. Its glow was a white one, it was evolving! The white, glowing bird was now flying straight up the trunk of the tree. The glow had finally bounced off the bird and revealed a larger bird around 2 feet tall, its body was naturally bigger along with the curl on its head which had more fully wrapped around into a swirl. It had evolved from Starly into Staravia!
While Starly was falling Swablu had come down and waited by Max. Staravia was now in sight by the Swablu and the two trainers.
Barely acknowledging what had happened Matt wanted to finish the battle “Staravia quick attack!” Commanded Matt
Staravia quickly picked up a huge amount of speed and shot straight at Swablu who didn’t have time to get out of the way. Staravia had hit it perfectly causing it to be flung into the trunk of the tree and then ricocheted right into Max’s arms.
“Starl…I mean Staravia how did you evolve so quickly, that battle was magnificent!” Exclaimed Matt as Staravia flew onto his shoulder.
“Starly must have been really strong when you caught it Matt.” Replied Max
“Well anyone could have told you that,” Ellen said, she was sitting down on a branch just a couple feet lower from where Matt and Max were standing. “Matt what is it with you first a mountain then a tree. What’s next, are you going to be battling in the middle of the ocean?”
“Hey I’ll take whatever battle comes, whenever, wherever!”
“Good attitude Matt! Now can we please get out of this tree!” argued Ellen
“Sure I don’t see why not, Pikachu, Staravia lets go!” The trainers and there Pokémon slowly hopped from branch to branch. There were plenty of Pokémon still in the tree. Caterpies were hanging from branches, flocks of Pidgey were roosted on far up branches, and even some Beautifly roaming around the sky.
The 3 and their Pokémon jumped down from the lowest branch onto the ground. It seemed that quite a bit of trainers had left this morning to continue farther north towards the Pokémon League. However there was a battle going on near one of the buildings where trainers would sleep. It was a double battle, one trainer had out both a Pidgeotto and a Taillow while the other trainer had out a Yanma and an Electrike. The two birds both pulled off a double team at the same time, this completely surrounded Yanma and Electrike. They then both flew in with an Aerial Ace knocking out the dog and the bug.
The 3 walked over to the battle area; however Ellen’s intention was simply to make sure the cottage was theirs for sleeping tonight. As they were approaching the young trainer with the Yanma and Electrike ran off into the distance. The other trainer returned his Pidgeotto and Taillow and then started to walk away. He stopped however when he noticed Matt, Max, and Ellen walking toward them.
“You see the battle?” Asked the boy
“Yes it was a great battle! You’re a doubles fan huh? Hey are your Pokémon still up for another battle?” Questioned Max
“Ha, well they didn’t get much of a workout with that other kid, sure we can do it!” Responded the boy
“Great, hey Matt why don’t you battle with me, it will still be 2 on 2. Oh by the way my names Max, that’s Matt, and tha…Hey where did Ellen go? Oh well let’s do this!”
“Ha looks like you’re really itching for a battle. By the way my name is Ahmad, but let’s get this underway, Pidgeotto, Taillow come on out!”
“Great come on out Treec…”
“Wait Max stop, can Swablu battle yet because you know grass has a type disadvantage to flying,” Said Matt trying to make this battle turn in their favor as much as possible.
“No way, your Staravia really knocked him silly; I have to go with Treecko”
“Fine then I better go with my type advantage, come on out Pikachu!”
“Treecko you’re up!”
Now all 4 Pokémon were out and ready to battle!
“Why don’t you two take the first move, I don’t need it!” Said Ahmad
“I told you I always get the first move,” replied Matt to Max “Well I better use it, Pikachu thunderbolt at Pidgeotto!” The electric attack was headed straight for the larger bird.
“Dodge it and use gust!” Ordered Ahmad, Pidgeotto’s wings started flapping rapidly. A small tornado of wind was accumulated and hurled at both Pikachu and Treecko.
“Get out of the way!” Matt and Max called in unison to their Pokémon. Pikachu and Treecko both ran into different directions, Pikachu ran to the left and Treecko ran to the right.
“Quick Attack!” Matt and Max called another order simultaneously. Pikachu and Treecko, who had successfully dodged the gust attack, and rocketed towards the birds. Pikachu jumped up and directly hit Pidgeotto with the quick attack, knocking it straight down to the ground. Treecko did the same, jumping up to hit Taillow; however it was not a direct hit, merely throwing Taillow off balance.
Pidgeotto slowly flew back up to where he was, Taillow and Pidgeotto were awaiting Ahmad’s orders. “Pidgeotto use gust! Taillow use whirlwind!” Ahmad commanded. The birds started flapping their wings, the whirlwind came first, there was wind everywhere. Pikachu and Treecko were barely able to keep their feet on the ground. The gust had been formed and was shot at Pikachu.
“Pikachu quick counter with discharge!” Pikachu quickly mustered up all the electricity in its body and shot it straight at the gust attack. The electricity hit the mini tornado sending it straight back at Pidgeotto. However the gust had been charged with electricity from the discharge. Pidgeotto was hit with the electric tornado causing it to be knocked back down to the ground. It was down for the count. Ahmad knew what happened and had ordered Taillow to stop the whirlwind.
“Pidgeotto return, you were great!” Congratulated Ahmad “Taillow lets finish this up, wing attack on Treecko!” Taillow’s wings started to glow and began rapidly flying straight towards Treecko.
“Treecko dodge it!” Called Max, however Taillow was too fast and it hit directly on Treecko. The type advantage was too strong, Treecko was knocked out.
“Treecko return, you were awesome I couldn’t have asked for more! Matt it looks like you’re going to have to end this”
“I can do that! Pikachu use double team!” ordered Matt, Pikachu sent copies of itself everywhere forming a circle around where Taillow was flying. “Quick Pikachu use thunderbolt!” Pikachu and all of its copies sent the electric bolt towards Taillow.
“Taillow dodge it!” called Ahmad but it couldn’t be done. All the copies shot there attack, Tallow was to intimidated by the copies and therefore couldn’t move. Taillow was struck directly with the attack and fell straight to the ground knocked out.
“Taillow return, you did good job. But how, we never lose?” questioned Ahmad.
“All I know is that Pikachu was amazing!” Said Matt as Pikachu ran into his arms.
“Hey you took out my Treecko so that’s something, great battle Ahmad,” Max went over to shake Ahmad’s hand.
“Yes that was a great battle! You’re really strong Ahmad” Matt stood up and went over to Ahmad to shake his hand.
“Well thanks guys that was a great battle on your part. But I will battle you again someday and I will win, but now I have to go and further train! Goodbye!” Ahmad ran off before Matt and Max could say anything further.
“Great Battle Matt, Pikachu you were awesome”
“Pika!”
“You were great to Max! So was Treecko, he fought hard!”
“Well thanks, hey where’d Ellen go it’s getting late?”
“I think she went into the cottage to get us some beds”
Matt returned Pikachu so he could rest and then they walked into the cottage. They found Ellen in one of the rooms lying on the bottom of a bunk bed, her Pokémon were out lying on the floor as well. The room was small and made of wood; there were 2 bunk beds and a small dresser.
“So this is where you were, thanks for telling us Elle!” Said Max angrily
“I noticed you guys were battling the bird guy so I thought I’d snag us a room! You really should be thanking me,” replied Ellen
“Yes thank you Ellen, now can we not turn this into a huge fight.” Responded Matt
“Fine” replied Ellen and Max simultaneously.
“Well why don’t you guys let your Pokémon out and let them play,” exclaimed Ellen.
“Good idea, come on out everyone!” Matt threw up his 3 Pokeballs and Piplup, Pikachu, and Staravia came out to play.
“You guys come out too,” Max sent out Treecko and Swablu, even though they were a little tired they managed fine.
It got late quick, after just hanging out in their room everyone decided to go to bed. Matt had the bottom bunk of one of the bunk beds where Max had the top of the same one. Ellen was on the bottom of the other bunk bed. Ponyta and Pikachu were asleep on the floor, Cyndaquil was on the bed with Ellen, Piplup and Staravia were on the bed with Matt, and Treecko and Swablu were on Max’s bed. They all fell asleep quite quickly after a long day. Matt had another dream that night. He was standing on a small beach alone. In front of him was the ocean, but all of a sudden a dark hole opened up, a small brown figure came out of it. It looked at Matt and then ran down onto the beach and into the distance. There was then a voice. It was deep and it said something but Matt couldn’t understand it. Then there was another red flash and Matt had instantly woken up. What was that, again with the weird dreams? Someone or something is trying to tell me something. I can’t make much of it now though I better get back to sleep before I wake up anyone else. And Matt fell right back asleep.
Well there it is, mysterious no? Hope you liked it!
LOL
Ya i need to edit that, I will do it soon. But until then I have completed not only new tc's but Chapter 8, now i super checked this for gramatical errors. Now knowing me there are probably still a ton of mistakes so if you see any let me know
Also Muckster I have figured out the perfect place for your character, unfortunately its not going to be for quite a few more chapters. As for chapter 8 drum roll please...bum bum bum bum bum. TA DA! Chapter 8
Starly was soaring downs headed straight to the ground. It didn’t seem there was anything Matt could do except watch the bird plummet. As Starly was falling its wings suddenly shot up causing it to curve and start to fly. It was awake, but Matt couldn’t figure out what did caused it. Until Starly, which was headed straight for the tree, immediately went vertical and started to glow. Its glow was a white one, it was evolving! The white, glowing bird was now flying straight up the trunk of the tree. The glow had finally bounced off the bird and revealed a larger bird around 2 feet tall, its body was naturally bigger along with the curl on its head which had more fully wrapped around into a swirl. It had evolved from Starly into Staravia!
While Starly was falling Swablu had come down and waited by Max. Staravia was now in sight by the Swablu and the two trainers.
Barely acknowledging what had happened Matt wanted to finish the battle “Staravia quick attack!” Commanded Matt
Staravia quickly picked up a huge amount of speed and shot straight at Swablu who didn’t have time to get out of the way. Staravia had hit it perfectly causing it to be flung into the trunk of the tree and then ricocheted right into Max’s arms.
“Starl…I mean Staravia how did you evolve so quickly, that battle was magnificent!” Exclaimed Matt as Staravia flew onto his shoulder.
“Starly must have been really strong when you caught it Matt.” Replied Max
“Well anyone could have told you that,” Ellen said, she was sitting down on a branch just a couple feet lower from where Matt and Max were standing. “Matt what is it with you first a mountain then a tree. What’s next, are you going to be battling in the middle of the ocean?”
“Hey I’ll take whatever battle comes, whenever, wherever!”
“Good attitude Matt! Now can we please get out of this tree!” argued Ellen
“Sure I don’t see why not, Pikachu, Staravia lets go!” The trainers and there Pokémon slowly hopped from branch to branch. There were plenty of Pokémon still in the tree. Caterpies were hanging from branches, flocks of Pidgey were roosted on far up branches, and even some Beautifly roaming around the sky.
The 3 and their Pokémon jumped down from the lowest branch onto the ground. It seemed that quite a bit of trainers had left this morning to continue farther north towards the Pokémon League. However there was a battle going on near one of the buildings where trainers would sleep. It was a double battle, one trainer had out both a Pidgeotto and a Taillow while the other trainer had out a Yanma and an Electrike. The two birds both pulled off a double team at the same time, this completely surrounded Yanma and Electrike. They then both flew in with an Aerial Ace knocking out the dog and the bug.
The 3 walked over to the battle area; however Ellen’s intention was simply to make sure the cottage was theirs for sleeping tonight. As they were approaching the young trainer with the Yanma and Electrike ran off into the distance. The other trainer returned his Pidgeotto and Taillow and then started to walk away. He stopped however when he noticed Matt, Max, and Ellen walking toward them.
“You see the battle?” Asked the boy
“Yes it was a great battle! You’re a doubles fan huh? Hey are your Pokémon still up for another battle?” Questioned Max
“Ha, well they didn’t get much of a workout with that other kid, sure we can do it!” Responded the boy
“Great, hey Matt why don’t you battle with me, it will still be 2 on 2. Oh by the way my names Max, that’s Matt, and tha…Hey where did Ellen go? Oh well let’s do this!”
“Ha looks like you’re really itching for a battle. By the way my name is Ahmad, but let’s get this underway, Pidgeotto, Taillow come on out!”
“Great come on out Treec…”
“Wait Max stop, can Swablu battle yet because you know grass has a type disadvantage to flying,” Said Matt trying to make this battle turn in their favor as much as possible.
“No way, your Staravia really knocked him silly; I have to go with Treecko”
“Fine then I better go with my type advantage, come on out Pikachu!”
“Treecko you’re up!”
Now all 4 Pokémon were out and ready to battle!
“Why don’t you two take the first move, I don’t need it!” Said Ahmad
“I told you I always get the first move,” replied Matt to Max “Well I better use it, Pikachu thunderbolt at Pidgeotto!” The electric attack was headed straight for the larger bird.
“Dodge it and use gust!” Ordered Ahmad, Pidgeotto’s wings started flapping rapidly. A small tornado of wind was accumulated and hurled at both Pikachu and Treecko.
“Get out of the way!” Matt and Max called in unison to their Pokémon. Pikachu and Treecko both ran into different directions, Pikachu ran to the left and Treecko ran to the right.
“Quick Attack!” Matt and Max called another order simultaneously. Pikachu and Treecko, who had successfully dodged the gust attack, and rocketed towards the birds. Pikachu jumped up and directly hit Pidgeotto with the quick attack, knocking it straight down to the ground. Treecko did the same, jumping up to hit Taillow; however it was not a direct hit, merely throwing Taillow off balance.
Pidgeotto slowly flew back up to where he was, Taillow and Pidgeotto were awaiting Ahmad’s orders. “Pidgeotto use gust! Taillow use whirlwind!” Ahmad commanded. The birds started flapping their wings, the whirlwind came first, there was wind everywhere. Pikachu and Treecko were barely able to keep their feet on the ground. The gust had been formed and was shot at Pikachu.
“Pikachu quick counter with discharge!” Pikachu quickly mustered up all the electricity in its body and shot it straight at the gust attack. The electricity hit the mini tornado sending it straight back at Pidgeotto. However the gust had been charged with electricity from the discharge. Pidgeotto was hit with the electric tornado causing it to be knocked back down to the ground. It was down for the count. Ahmad knew what happened and had ordered Taillow to stop the whirlwind.
“Pidgeotto return, you were great!” Congratulated Ahmad “Taillow lets finish this up, wing attack on Treecko!” Taillow’s wings started to glow and began rapidly flying straight towards Treecko.
“Treecko dodge it!” Called Max, however Taillow was too fast and it hit directly on Treecko. The type advantage was too strong, Treecko was knocked out.
“Treecko return, you were awesome I couldn’t have asked for more! Matt it looks like you’re going to have to end this”
“I can do that! Pikachu use double team!” ordered Matt, Pikachu sent copies of itself everywhere forming a circle around where Taillow was flying. “Quick Pikachu use thunderbolt!” Pikachu and all of its copies sent the electric bolt towards Taillow.
“Taillow dodge it!” called Ahmad but it couldn’t be done. All the copies shot there attack, Tallow was to intimidated by the copies and therefore couldn’t move. Taillow was struck directly with the attack and fell straight to the ground knocked out.
“Taillow return, you did good job. But how, we never lose?” questioned Ahmad.
“All I know is that Pikachu was amazing!” Said Matt as Pikachu ran into his arms.
“Hey you took out my Treecko so that’s something, great battle Ahmad,” Max went over to shake Ahmad’s hand.
“Yes that was a great battle! You’re really strong Ahmad” Matt stood up and went over to Ahmad to shake his hand.
“Well thanks guys that was a great battle on your part. But I will battle you again someday and I will win, but now I have to go and further train! Goodbye!” Ahmad ran off before Matt and Max could say anything further.
“Great Battle Matt, Pikachu you were awesome”
“Pika!”
“You were great to Max! So was Treecko, he fought hard!”
“Well thanks, hey where’d Ellen go it’s getting late?”
“I think she went into the cottage to get us some beds”
Matt returned Pikachu so he could rest and then they walked into the cottage. They found Ellen in one of the rooms lying on the bottom of a bunk bed, her Pokémon were out lying on the floor as well. The room was small and made of wood; there were 2 bunk beds and a small dresser.
“So this is where you were, thanks for telling us Elle!” Said Max angrily
“I noticed you guys were battling the bird guy so I thought I’d snag us a room! You really should be thanking me,” replied Ellen
“Yes thank you Ellen, now can we not turn this into a huge fight.” Responded Matt
“Fine” replied Ellen and Max simultaneously.
“Well why don’t you guys let your Pokémon out and let them play,” exclaimed Ellen.
“Good idea, come on out everyone!” Matt threw up his 3 Pokeballs and Piplup, Pikachu, and Staravia came out to play.
“You guys come out too,” Max sent out Treecko and Swablu, even though they were a little tired they managed fine.
It got late quick, after just hanging out in their room everyone decided to go to bed. Matt had the bottom bunk of one of the bunk beds where Max had the top of the same one. Ellen was on the bottom of the other bunk bed. Ponyta and Pikachu were asleep on the floor, Cyndaquil was on the bed with Ellen, Piplup and Staravia were on the bed with Matt, and Treecko and Swablu were on Max’s bed. They all fell asleep quite quickly after a long day. Matt had another dream that night. He was standing on a small beach alone. In front of him was the ocean, but all of a sudden a dark hole opened up, a small brown figure came out of it. It looked at Matt and then ran down onto the beach and into the distance. There was then a voice. It was deep and it said something but Matt couldn’t understand it. Then there was another red flash and Matt had instantly woken up. What was that, again with the weird dreams? Someone or something is trying to tell me something. I can’t make much of it now though I better get back to sleep before I wake up anyone else. And Matt fell right back asleep.
Well there it is, mysterious no? Hope you liked it!
RE: Pokemon Journey Through Life, CHAPTER 8 IS HERE! COME CHECK IT OUT AND COMMENT!
Yay! My character! YAY!
Yay! My character! YAY!
RE: Pokemon Journey Through Life, CHAPTER 8 IS HERE! COME CHECK IT OUT AND COMMENT!
Yay! My character! YAY!
Yay! My character! YAY!
RE: Pokemon Journey Through Life, CHAPTER 8 IS HERE! COME CHECK IT OUT AND COMMENT!
Hmm hmm... you know where THAT is going
Ok, so, my input this time. As always, the content is good! You seem to have a knack for fighting and not travelling too much though. Not a bad thing, since most action comes from battles, but if you ever want to get around the island, you need to travel too
People must either not be reading my fic, or weren't paying attention during our "discussion", if they can't see the significance of a certain... section of that. You know it, I know it, so unless someone else picks up on it we'll leave it at that, yes?
Now... glad to see CONSISTENCY in the grammer this time - that side is much better. Now let's focus on the final point(s) of CORRECTNESS for it, and you'll be fine.
The only speech thing I really noticed was that you still capitalized the first word after the speech; namely the Said, Exclaimed, Shouted and such. Unless the word SHOULD be capitalized as standard (like a name or something), this is incorrect. Word won't complain, but that's because it too needs English lessons. Once or twice you got this down, mostly at the end, but this is now one of the few things you need to look at.
Of course, a little variety wouldn't necessarily be bad. By that I mean this - sometimes you could say "Matt said" as opposed to "said Matt" - same result, but a different way around it. "Matt said, anger in his voice" could create a lot more impact than simply "said Matt angrily" for example - and it'd make a lot more sense at the same time.
A second point would be that SOME sentences read a little... fast. I felt you were missing one or two commas in places to assist readability a little further. I'll give the couple of examples I can find in the short time I'm looking for them, along with how I would have written them (as in how I actually read them in my mind)
There... that's enough to show what I'm talking about. The sentences you wrote aren't WRONG persay, but they don't read as well as they would with the commas in place. Remember that commas are used to separate actions and suchlike, as well as providing a small break in the middle of the sentence. Just remember that they AREN'T a substitute for a period... too many commas in a sentence causes it to become convoluted and impossible to read (this is called Comma Splicing if you're interested ).
My last SMALL point is one that is often hard to spot/avoid... but it's nasty when it comes up (kinda like bugs in systems)... the dreaded run-on sentence. I found one in this chapter, if I can remember where it is... *looks for a minute*
Dammit... I KNOW there was one there, but I went on to fix other parts and lost it... I'll try again later to find it. But I know there was a sentence which should have had something like 3 commas in it and there were none, which makes it FAR to fast when it is being read. Just watch for it, ok?
It's definitely better than the last one - it's just me being picky as always. I'm only trying to help you though, as you know
Keep at it!
Hmm hmm... you know where THAT is going
Ok, so, my input this time. As always, the content is good! You seem to have a knack for fighting and not travelling too much though
. Not a bad thing, since most action comes from battles, but if you ever want to get around the island, you need to travel too People must either not be reading my fic, or weren't paying attention during our "discussion", if they can't see the significance of a certain... section of that. You know it, I know it, so unless someone else picks up on it we'll leave it at that, yes?
Now... glad to see CONSISTENCY in the grammer this time - that side is much better. Now let's focus on the final point(s) of CORRECTNESS for it, and you'll be fine.
The only speech thing I really noticed was that you still capitalized the first word after the speech; namely the Said, Exclaimed, Shouted and such. Unless the word SHOULD be capitalized as standard (like a name or something), this is incorrect. Word won't complain, but that's because it too needs English lessons
. Once or twice you got this down, mostly at the end, but this is now one of the few things you need to look at.Of course, a little variety wouldn't necessarily be bad. By that I mean this - sometimes you could say "Matt said" as opposed to "said Matt" - same result, but a different way around it. "Matt said, anger in his voice" could create a lot more impact than simply "said Matt angrily" for example - and it'd make a lot more sense at the same time.
A second point would be that SOME sentences read a little... fast. I felt you were missing one or two commas in places to assist readability a little further. I'll give the couple of examples I can find in the short time I'm looking for them, along with how I would have written them (as in how I actually read them in my mind
)Moneyking63 said:
Calum's version (there's a little more than just a fast sentence here... said:“I can do that! Pikachu use double team!” ordered Matt. (not ,
MoneyKing63 said:
Calum's version (All 3 sentences have the exact same problem said:
There... that's enough to show what I'm talking about
. The sentences you wrote aren't WRONG persay, but they don't read as well as they would with the commas in place. Remember that commas are used to separate actions and suchlike, as well as providing a small break in the middle of the sentence. Just remember that they AREN'T a substitute for a period... too many commas in a sentence causes it to become convoluted and impossible to read (this is called Comma Splicing if you're interested ).My last SMALL point is one that is often hard to spot/avoid... but it's nasty when it comes up (kinda like bugs in systems)... the dreaded run-on sentence. I found one in this chapter, if I can remember where it is... *looks for a minute*
Dammit... I KNOW there was one there, but I went on to fix other parts and lost it... I'll try again later to find it. But I know there was a sentence which should have had something like 3 commas in it and there were none, which makes it FAR to fast when it is being read. Just watch for it, ok?
It's definitely better than the last one - it's just me being picky as always
. I'm only trying to help you though, as you know Keep at it!
RE: Pokemon Journey Through Life, CHAPTER 8 IS HERE! COME CHECK IT OUT AND COMMENT!
Well 1st of thanks everyone for liking the chapter. I'm glad most of the grammer was better.
2nd Yes i realized I do need to travel more but trust me I'll take care of that trust me. I always have a plan!
3rd ok I get all those points the "said" thing ok I understand that now, same for the commas and periods. Hmm there was a run on you say, when I was looking through it I caught one and fixed it there must have been another one. And yes of course I know these are all for constructive purposes.
Thanks for the help Calum and thanks to everyone for the comments!
Well 1st of thanks everyone for liking the chapter. I'm glad most of the grammer was better.
2nd Yes i realized I do need to travel more but trust me I'll take care of that trust me
. I always have a plan! 3rd ok I get all those points the "said" thing ok I understand that now, same for the commas and periods. Hmm there was a run on you say, when I was looking through it I caught one and fixed it there must have been another one. And yes of course I know these are all for constructive purposes.
Thanks for the help Calum and thanks to everyone for the comments!
RE: Pokemon Journey Through Life, CHAPTER 8 IS HERE! COME CHECK IT OUT AND COMMENT!
Well, I just finished reading it! It's really nice
I really don't know what else to say about it, but it is great!
I can't wait to read more chapters of this story!
Well, I just finished reading it! It's really nice
I really don't know what else to say about it, but it is great!
I can't wait to read more chapters of this story!
RE: Pokemon Journey Through Life, CHAPTER 8 IS HERE! COME CHECK IT OUT AND COMMENT!
GREAT!! i know i am never on but i just read it and it is awsome!!
GREAT!! i know i am never on but i just read it and it is awsome!!
RE: Pokemon Journey Through Life, CHAPTER 8 IS HERE! COME CHECK IT OUT AND COMMENT!
RR nice to see you on! Glad you really like it!
Delcatty Lover Glad to see you like!
Almost done with the next chapter but school is really taking its toll right now so I'm Pretty busy, It should be up soon though!
RR nice to see you on
! Glad you really like it!Delcatty Lover Glad to see you like!
Almost done with the next chapter but school is really taking its toll right now so I'm Pretty busy, It should be up soon though!
RE: Pokemon Journey Through Life, CHAPTER 8 IS HERE! COME CHECK IT OUT AND COMMENT!
I can be a character too, right?
Name: Bryan
Pokemon: Pachirisu, Bunneary, I guess you can pick the rest
Age: 14
Is there anything else I forgot to add?
Please tell me.
And thank you for letting me be in this story!
I can be a character too, right?
Name: Bryan
Pokemon: Pachirisu, Bunneary, I guess you can pick the rest
Age: 14
Is there anything else I forgot to add?
Please tell me.
And thank you for letting me be in this story!
RE: Pokemon Journey Through Life, CHAPTER 8 IS HERE! COME CHECK IT OUT AND COMMENT!
Great, I'm not sure when you'll be appearing but your in! I am having alot of homework right now, alot going on to.
Great, I'm not sure when you'll be appearing but your in! I am having alot of homework right now, alot going on to.
RE: Pokemon Journey Through Life, CHAPTER 8 IS HERE! COME CHECK IT OUT AND COMMENT!
OHHHH !!! IT'S AWESOME !! And the thrill is starting, hehehehe who could be that strange monster on Matt's dreams ? All of the characters are appearing now....
OHHHH !!! IT'S AWESOME !! And the thrill is starting, hehehehe who could be that strange monster on Matt's dreams ? All of the characters are appearing now....
RE: Pokemon Journey Through Life, CHAPTER 8 IS HERE! COME CHECK IT OUT AND COMMENT!
Glad you like the progression! As for what you think that thing is, just wait!
Glad you like the progression! As for what you think that thing is, just wait!
RE: Pokemon Journey Through Life, CHAPTER 8 IS HERE! COME CHECK IT OUT AND COMMENT!
Me thinks thats Darkrai. in Chapter 8, My character said He'll be back, Does that mean Anything?
Me thinks thats Darkrai. in Chapter 8, My character said He'll be back, Does that mean Anything?
RE: Pokemon Journey Through Life, CHAPTER 8 IS HERE! COME CHECK IT OUT AND COMMENT!
Time will tell all things! Well I can't say much but I wouldn't look too deep into it, like I said all of these characters are not going to be Main characters. But that doesn't mean they wont show up again to help out. Just wait and see thats all i can say!
Time will tell all things! Well I can't say much but I wouldn't look too deep into it, like I said all of these characters are not going to be Main characters. But that doesn't mean they wont show up again to help out. Just wait and see thats all i can say!
RE: Pokemon Journey Through Life, CHAPTER 8 IS HERE! COME CHECK IT OUT AND COMMENT!
I'm SO Gonna read this Fanfic! (Which I already am)
I'm SO Gonna read this Fanfic! (Which I already am
)